


When I Almost Lost You

by CorpsesPlayingPoker



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: F/M, Kidnapping, Original Character(s), Slavery
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-13
Updated: 2019-04-21
Packaged: 2019-06-26 20:25:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 70,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15670650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CorpsesPlayingPoker/pseuds/CorpsesPlayingPoker
Summary: After a fight with Kagome Inuyasha storms off. But when he doesn't come back the group begins to worry, and finds evidence that something terrible has happened to him. How far will Kagome go to get him back? Rated for violence and language.





	1. What Have I Done?

Chapter 1: What Have I Done?

  
The sun had completely set and Inuyasha still wasn't back. At first Kagome tried to tell herself he was just mad, but as the minutes ticked by she was really getting worried. It wasn't like him to be alone on his human night or miss dinner.

Kagome looked up from the fire as Sango and Kirara returned. Alone.

"It's no use, it's too dark to see anything." Sango glared at Kagome as she spoke, before shaking her head. "We'll start looking again at sunrise."

Kagome hugged her knees against the cold of the December night, looking into the thick forest that surrounded their small camp. She scanned all around her, hoping to see a flash of red.

"Hey, don't worry!" Shippo tried to cheer her up. "He probably just got lost when his sense of smell went away at sundown. He'll find us in the morning."

Kagome smiled at the fox boy. "I'm sure you're right..." She looked back out at the forest, thinking about what had happened earlier. It was such a stupid fight, she could barely remember what started it. But she definitely remembered how it had ended.

...

_"Where are you going?" she angrily demanded._

_"Out." Inuyasha said. He turned to leave. "You know, you could be a little grateful for me saving your ass every damn day."_

_Kagome felt her anger boil over as she stood up, and before she even realized what she was saying it was already half-way out of her mouth._

_"Go on, get out of here! No one wants you around! No one would miss you if you never came back!"_

_The rest of their group looked at her, and she could have sworn that, for just a moment, Inuyasha had paused mid-step. But then he just continued walking, before leaping into the treetops._

_"Kagome," Sango looked to the girl from the future as the group watched Inuyasha leave. "you really shouldn't say things like that to him."_

_Kagome crossed her arms. "It's his fault! He's such a jerk!"_

_Sango shook her head. "What if the last thing you ever get to say to him is that nobody would miss him?"_

_"That would be fine by me!"_

_Seeing that Kagome wasn't in the mood to listen Sango simply turned back to building their fire along with Miroku._

...

At sunup Inuyasha still wasn't back. Now everyone was worried.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome called out as she, Miroku, and Shippo searched on the ground while Sango and Kirara looked for him from the air. They had been searching for hours without any sign of him. She was getting frantic. "Inuyasha please answer me! I'm sorry! I didn't mean it!"

Kagome felt tears fill her eyes. She really hadn't meant it. What if he didn't come back and really had left forever? What if he was hurt or dead? What if the last thing she ever said to him is that nobody would miss him?

"Wait a minute!"

Shippo held his hand up before he hopped onto Kagome's head and sniffed the air. Although not quite as strong as Inuyasha's nose, he could still smell much better than a human.

"I think...I think...over there!" He pointed to their side. "I smell his scent!" He nearly fell off as Kagome ran through the undergrowth. "Whoa! Hey!"

"Inuyasha! Inuyasha!" She called, finding a break in the trees that had a road running through it. They had actually made it to the other side of the forest. But still no sign of Inuyasha...

"Kagome, is he..." Miroku began before noticing something odd on the grass.

Blood.

"Over here!"

Kagome walked with Shippo over to the monk. There was a streak of blood on the grass. Not a lot, certainly not a deadly amount to lose. But still it wasn't a good sign.

"Shippo...is it...?" Kagome began as the kitsune sniffed the ground.

"It's his all right, and he lost it when he was a human." Shippo told her. He started to follow a scent trail, only to jump back and grab his foot as a small electrical arc hit it.

"OW! OW! OW!" He hopped on one foot before Kagome picked him up. "I stepped on something! It burned!"

Miroku bent down and felt in the thick grass, withdrawing something long. The three of them immediately recognized it.

The untransformed Tessaiga.

...

As the sun began to set their small group made camp again. The mood was somber, no one feeling much like making small talk. Even Shippo wasn't his usual cheery self, instead curled up with Kirara.

It was no longer a question of Inuyasha leaving them voluntarily. He had been kidnapped.

They all had the same questions. Who could kidnap Inuyasha? How could they contain him? Why would they do it?

"Do you think it was Sesshomaru? Or maybe Naraku?" Miroku asked Kagome as he handed her a bowl of soup.

"Maybe..." Kagome shook her head. "...no. If it was Sesshomaru he would have taken Tessaiga. And Naraku wouldn't leave any doubt, he'd want us to know it was him." She stared into her reflection in the soup for a few moments. "It's all my fault, isn't it?"

"No..." The monk began. "You didn't know..."

"Yes it is."

All eyes went to Sango, who drank from her soup before continuing. "Yes, it is your fault Kagome. You decided your stubborn pride was more important than Inuyasha's safety. You should never have let him leave on his human night."

Tears filled Kagome's eyes for what felt like the tenth time that day. "How...how can you say that?"

"Because it's the truth. Admit it, you expected him to come crawling back to you. You take him entirely for granted."

Kagome set her soup down and stood, hands balling into fists at her sides. "I do not take Inuyasha for granted!"

"Sango, can I talk to you for a moment?" Miroku pulled the youkai slayer to her feet and led her behind a tree before the two women could get into a fist fight.

"Look, you want her to hate herself? Well she does." He said sternly, his voice holding none of it's usual calm. "Beating up on her isn't going to help us find Inuyasha."

Sango looked away from him. "You think I don't know that? But what else can I do right now? I feel so damn helpless..."

Miroku took her hands in his and sighed. "Yeah, I know, I feel the same. I want to find him too. But we won't be able to help Inuyasha if we turn on each other."

The two of them stood like that for a few moments. Nothing more needed to be said. They both knew the pain of losing a family member, and even if they weren't related to Inuyasha they still considered him family.

After a minute Sango walked back from behind the tree, sitting next to Kagome. She handed Kagome her soup, saying nothing.

Kagome took the soup, lost in thought. 'Do I take Inuyasha for granted? But it's so easy too...he's always there. Inuyasha, I'm sorry if I ever made you feel unappreciated.'

...

The first time Inuyasha woke up in the dark room he had yelled and struggled. The chains on his wrists seemed to pull the strength from his body. Some sort of magic he guessed. He could barely stand, much less fight back. Then the man had come and said one thing to him.

"Animals don't talk."

The man had put a muzzle on him, then led him out of the dark room. He hated the feeling of the muzzle. It had a metal bit that cut his mouth if he tried to move too fast. As his eyes struggled with the light the man had thrown him over a stone block and taken a whip to him. He had screamed into the muzzle, out of both pain and wounded pride.

Once the flogging was over he was put back in the dark room, his chains hung to a hook on the ceiling that forced him to stand on his tiptoes with his arms in the air. He hung there naked and alone, his body aching, for...he wasn't sure how long. Hours? Days? The total darkness made it hard to judge how much time had passed.

But eventually the man had returned. He removed the muzzle, and once again his captive had shouted at him.

"Animals don't talk."

The muzzle went right back on, and he had once again been taken out of the dark room, thrown over the block, flogged until blood ran down his back, then taken back to the dark room and hung in his chains.

Another indeterminable period of time passed. Everything hurt. He was very thirsty, and starting to see things moving in the darkness. It was just his mind playing tricks on him...right?

Hanging in the darkness, he finally admitted it to himself.

No one was coming for him.

Why would they? He was a fool to believe anyone wanted him around. He was weak, just like his half-brother always said he was. He was a filthy, tainted hanyou and Kagome had cast him out. No, thrown him away like the trash he was. She was probably with Koga right now. They'd probably already defeated Naraku.

He looked up as the door to the dark room open once again. It was the man again. This time he had two things in his hands. The whip, and a bowl of water.

"Animals don't talk." He said, letting his captive down from the hook and removing the muzzle.

Inuyasha looked at the bowl, licking his dry, cracked lips.

He remained silent.

The man placed the bowl on the floor.

Slowly, Inuyasha approached the bowl on all fours and took a small sip. The water tasted funny, probably drugged. But what choice did he have?

And so Inuyasha began to lap up the water in the bowl, even as his vision started to blur.

"Good dog."  
  



	2. I Will Find You

Chapter 2: I Will Find You

"Help me!"

Kagome ran through a forest towards the sound of his voice.

"Inuyasha! Where are you?"

All around her was darkness. She couldn't see anything.

"Kagome please!"

She ran towards the anguished cries, branches tearing at her face.

"I'm coming Inuyasha!"

But it seemed like no matter how hard she ran she never got closer. She pushed herself until her lungs felt like they would burst.

"Why Kagome? Why won't you save me?!" Inuyasha's voice screamed out. "Why did you abandon me?!"

"Inuyasha I'm sorry! I can't find you! Inuyasha? Inuyasha?!"

"INUYASHA!"

Miroku looked to the girl from the future from his position next to the fire as she sat up in her sleeping bag, wide-eyed and panting.

"Another nightmare?" Miroku asked. The group had stopped for the night on the way back to Keade's village, and Miroku had taken first watch. Sango sat up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

Kagome tried to get her breathing under control even as a concerned Shippo hopped into her arms, trying to calm her down. "It's okay Kagome. Like you told me, dreams can't hurt you."

Kagome gave the boy a slight smile before laying back down. It had been like this for the past three nights. It seemed like every time she tried to sleep she would dream of trying to find Inuyasha. The first night he was hurt when she found him. On the second night he was already dead by the time she got to him. Now it seemed she couldn't find him at all.

She just felt so helpless! She wanted to do more, but had no idea what. It wasn't like she could call up the police in her time and tell them a boy with dog ears had been kidnapped 500 years ago.

"We should have looked in that forest for another day." Sango said out loud to no one in particular as she petted Kirara. "We might have missed something..."

"We've been over his." Miroku told her. "We're almost out of food and none of us can hunt as well as Inuyasha can. It won't help him if we starve."

Kagome turned to her side in her sleeping bag as she thought how true that was. Inuyasha nearly always insisted on doing all the hunting and fishing for the group himself. Of course he said it was because the rest of them took too long, and he had made it seem so easy with his abilities. He just lept into the air and brought down birds with a swipe of his claws. Or sniffed out rabbits and pounced on them. Or pulled fish from a stream, his hand moving too fast for their merely human eyes to see. But she suspected he really insisted on doing it because he enjoyed providing for them.

Kagome closed her eyes, but after about twenty minutes sleep still wouldn't come. She was too worried about Inuyasha, to afraid of another nightmare.

"Get some sleep, I might as well take next watch." she told the monk as she stood. It was strange, even though she often slept in the open she had never felt unsafe with Inuyasha watching over them. But without him the night seemed darker, malevolent in a way. When she had suggested they sleep in shifts the others had readily agreed. And as Miroku laid down near the fire she got out her bow and an arrow, constantly scanning the darkness for threats.

'Inuyasha...where are you?'

...

The next day their group finally arrived back at Kaede's village in mid-morning. The old priestess immediately knew something was wrong just by the looks on their faces, not to mention Inuyasha's absence. She made them tea as Kagome told her everything that had happened.

"I agree, this doesn't sound like any plot of Naraku's." Kaede said, handing Kagome her tea. "Strange that there has been no demand for ransom."

"What do you think that means?" Sango asked before she took a sip of tea.

"It means whoever has taken him plans to keep him." She left out the other option to spare Kagome's feeling. They could have taken Inuyasha to torture him and then kill him somewhere else.

"I don't suppose you have a tracking spell or something that can locate him?" Miroku asked as he held his teacup.

Kaede shook her head sadly. "Would that it were possible. Such spells must be cast before they are needed, with the person to be tracked present."

After their tea Sango had announced she was going back out with Kirara to search a village near the forest they had lost Inuyasha in. No one had the heart to remind her that they had already spend a day asking around there as a group, with no luck. It was clear that Inuyasha's loss had hit her especially hard.

After Miroku, Sango, and Shippo had left Kagome looked to Keade. "Kaede can I ask you something?

Kaede sat next to her. "Of course. What's on your mind?"

Kagome finished off her tea, then stared into the empty cup. "Am I...am I a bad person?"

The old priestess raised her eyebrow. "What? No of course not! What brought this up?"

Kagome continued to stare at her empty teacup. "On the night after Inuyasha went missing Sango said it was all my fault and that I take him for granted. What if she's right?"

"Nonsense." Kaede placed a hand on her back. "You care deeply for Inuyasha. Anyone can see that."

"Do I? I always tell myself that I don't think of Inuyasha as less than human, that I accept him for who he is. But now I wonder if I really do think of him as a human. I don't put beads on the other's necks. I don't sit Miroku even though he sometimes really deserves it..."

She sniffed, tears filling her eyes. "I...I never take his side. I act like he's always wrong about everything no matter what. And what I said to him...what if he doesn't forgive me?"

The old woman hugged her to her shoulder. "Kagome, look at me."

The girl looked at her, a few tears falling.

"When Inuyasha gets back, and have no doubt he will, these are things you need to talk with him about if you think they are so. But I will tell you right now that you are not a bad person. Bad people never question their motives. Bad people are always sure of their righteousness. You make mistakes, you are only human. But as long as you recognize those mistakes, and try to make up for them, you are never going to be a bad person."

...

Kagome stood before the well, looking down into it. She chewed her lip, unsure.

Should she really go back to her own time? Inuyasha was still out there, somewhere. But Kaede had insisted. She'd said that Sango and Miroku would keep up the search, and she could check in every day.

It just felt wrong. Like she was abandoning Inuyasha. Still, her family was important to her too...

'Please be safe Inuyasha, wherever you are.'

She jumped into the well, feeling the familiar sensations that accompanied her travels through time, until she landed at the bottom in the old well house in her time.

The first thing that hit her was how cold it was. She looked down and could see frost on the bottom of the well.

Climbing up was hard, the metal bars were so cold that they hurt her hands. And when she got to the top a blast of cold wind nearly send her falling back. The door to the well house had been left wide open, letting in the cold and wind. Kagome pulled her backpack tight as if she expected it to offer any protection against the cold, and headed out of the small building. She could see the lights were on, and sighed in relief. Whoever was still awake at this hour didn't matter. She just couldn't be alone right now.

...

"So there has been no trace of him?" Grandfather Higurashi asked. He set out some hot tea for her as they sat together in the kitchen.

"None." Kagome told him as she looked around. They had put up the Christmas decorations and lights while she had been in the past. She smiled a little, in spite of herself, when she saw the drawings of Santa Sota and herself had made in kindergarten hanging up on the refrigerator, just like they had every Christmas since she was five.

"Is there anything I can do?" He asked his granddaughter.

Kagome sighed. "Not really no." She paused. "Don't tell Sota Inuyasha's gone. Let him enjoy his Christmas."

The old man nodded. "Will you be going to school in the morning? No one would blame you if you want to stay home"

"I guess I should go." she said, taking her tea. "I just hope I can keep it together. It's not like I can tell anyone else what has happened." She looked across the table at him.

"Well, just remember that we are here for you." He reached out a wrinkled hand, wiping away the single tear on her cheek.

...

Sango hopped off of Kirara. "Let's rest for a while." she said, sitting on a tree stump. The fire cat transformed into her smaller form and jumped into her lap. Sango petted her for a moment, then sighed.

"You think I should have told the others?" she asked Kirara. "I mean, surely the possibility has crossed their minds since we found the Tessaiga."

The fire cat blinked up at her before mewling and licking her hand.

"I see your point. He's right, they wouldn't understand. That's why he asked me to do it."

...

_Sango stared at Inuyasha as of he had asked to set her mother on fire._

_"What...do you even know what you're asking?"_

_"Yeah. I want you to kill me." Inuyasha told her._

_"But...but why?" she asked. "Are you that unhappy with your life?"_

_"Not right now idiot!" He huffed, grabbing her shoulders. "I mean if I go too far. If I lose my mind like that again and can't come back. If that happens I want you to kill me."_

_Sango removed herself from his grip. "Inuyasha, I can't do that. Why don't you ask one of the others?"_

_"Are you kidding? They'd never do it." He said. "They'd probably do something stupid trying to get me to turn back, and end up being killed." He sat down and threw a small stick into the fire, watching it burn. "You're the only one I can trust to do what needs to be done if it comes to that."_

_He held out his clawed hands. "I can still feel their blood on my hands. And the worst thing? I remember liking it. I remember feeling like I wanted to kill everyone in the world."_

_"Why does it bother you so much?" Sango asked, sitting next to him. "Those men were rapists and murders. You've killed many youkai...why do these human deaths upset you so much?"_

_Inuyasha was silent for a few moments as he looked at the fire. "If I tell you why, will you promise to kill me if I get out of control?"_

_"Maybe." she said._

_He let out a breath. "Don't laugh, but it's because I promised my Mother I wouldn't kill humans."_

_Sango gave him a look of amazement. "Really?"_

_"Yes really." He said. "She made me promise. She told me I wasn't like the monsters that raided villages, dragging away people to be eaten. She told me I was better than that. That I had to protect people even when they were mean to me, and never ever use my claws on them. And now I've let her down..." He looked to her. "I don't want to be a monster. I don't want to kill you or Miroku or Kagome or Shippo."_

_Sango placed her hand on his shoulder. "I understand. Alright, I promise you that if you ever lose yourself permanently, I will end your life."_

...

Sango opened the pouch at her side, taking out a small, padded wooden box. She opened it and took out a small glass vial, checking to see if it was still intact. She held it up to the moonlight, noting the dark green liquid within.

"I promise Inuyasha, I will find you. You will either return to us as yourself, or you will never return."


	3. Regrets

Chapter 3: Regrets

The old man looked across the small table to the slave trader. "Thank you for your hospitality Renzo. But my visit here is strictly business. My Lord wishes to know how much longer until the merchandise is ready?"

Renzo sat his cup down. "I'll tell you the same thing I told him. It'll be ready when it's ready. Quality takes time."

"My Lord understands that, but he is eager to try out his new property."

Renzo ran a hand through his dark hair. Though he was almost forty, he was still powerfully built. Weak men did not survive long in his cruel trade. "I know, but he must understand that I can't leave the job half done. Would he rather wait a little longer, or risk getting torn to pieces if the training wears off?"

The old man across from him emptied his cup. "Nevertheless, I feel I should at least inspect the merchandise before I go. Make sure my Lord is getting his money's worth. Is that a problem?"

"No problem at all." Renzo stood and led him from the room, down the stairs to the cells.

"So, why hanyous?"

"Plenty of reasons." Renzo began "They can fetch a high price if you find the right buyer. If they're looking for a laborer, get a strong hanyou. A bodyguard or assassin? Get one with sharp teeth and claws. An exotic concubine? Get a pretty one. And most of them don't have any family to come after me, or at least none who would care too."

"But how do you capture them? Isn't it dangerous?"

"Not if you know what you're doing. You just have to mask your scent and stay downwind, then watch them. All hanyou have a period of time when they are fully human. Once I know when it is I can take a few of my men and grab them, get them in those old power-draining shackles I bought from a down on his luck monk. But that's the easy part."

The old man nodded as they passed a few of the slave trader's guards. "And the hard part?"

"I have to break them. Whippings, solitude, darkness, starvation, all have their uses." He pulled a small glass vial from his shirt, showing his guest the red liquid.

"And a little of my secret formula in their water dish to weaken their wills."

The two men reached a door at the bottom of the stairs. Renzo grabbed the whip from the hook it always hung on and slid the door open. The old man stared at the silver-haired form on the floor, watching as it cowered in fear of the slave trader, it's distress evident even with the muzzle that covered it's mouth. He frowned.

"The whip marks on it's back, my Lord will be displeased."

"Relax." Renzo snapped the whip once, making his captive throw himself at his feet. "Once I know it's broken I'll take the shackles off and it's youkai healing should get rid of those cuts. Just feed it, clean it up, and your Lord will find it obedient and eager to please him."

The old man nodded. "Can you at least give me a rough estimate as to how much longer this will take?"

Renzo shrugged before he pulled the silver-haired boy out of the room and threw him across the flogging block. "Another week at most. Then your Lord has nothing to worry about." He cracked the whip across the boy's bare back. The boy yelped from behind his muzzle, but made no move to defend himself.

"When I break them, they stay broken."

...

Kagome felt like she was living in a nightmare.

She had tried to distract herself with school. She threw herself into her studies, but it was no use. She couldn't stop worrying about Inuyasha. Once she got home she headed straight for the well, always hoping for news. But it never came. Sango and Kirara had searched far and wide, even enlisting those the group had helped in the past to look. But no one had seen so much as a hint of Inuyasha. Her friends were getting worried about her, and her school had called in her mother for a talk about her declining grades. So she had been forced to tell her mother everything that had happened. And, of course, Sota had overheard them. He had taken it about as well as a child his age could be expected too.

Now it was Christmas Day, two weeks since anyone had seen Inuyasha. While she gratefully accepted the presents from her mother, brother, and grandfather, each of them knew that the one thing she really wanted was missing.

Afterwards she lay on her bed, trying to look around for something, anything, to take her mind off of Inuyasha for even a moment. But everything in her room reminded her of him...

There was the windowsill he liked to perch on to watch her do her homework...

There was what was left of the alarm clock he had accidentally broken. He had even attempted to fix it later on, without success. But she had appreciated the effort...

There was the locket with their pictures in it from the school festival. She smiled a little at the memory. They both looked so mad in it...

There was the hairbrush she used to brush his hair whenever she could convince him to let her do so...

And there was her closet, where she had hidden...

Kagome stood up and walked to her closet. She open the closet door and took out a bag, removing two items from it. Presents she had intended to give Inuyasha for Christmas. He was hard to gift shop for since he didn't really seem to like anything other than food. Or really understand the point of owning more than he could carry.

She had gotten him two things; a bulk pack of ramen with chicken and pork (his favorite), and a picture she had taken of their group eating a watermelon she had brought from her time. She had hoped that, whenever he was feeling lonely, he could look at it and remember he did have friends.

She couldn't help laughing a little at the picture. Inuyasha had watermelon juice and seeds all over his face and was giving her his biggest sharp-toothed grin. Once he could be convinced to let his guard down he was actually pretty fun to be around. She had seen hints that he was coming out of his shell in the way he played with Buyo and Sota, and sometimes Shippo.

And there was that one time...

...

_Kagome stepped out of the well in the feudal era, surprised Inuyasha wasn't there to complain about how long she'd been gone even though she had told him she'd be back today. She shrugged and headed for Kaede's village._

_On the way she ran into Sango, who took her hand. "Kagome you have to see this, it's Inuyasha." she said, starting to drag her into the bushes._

_"Wait, what's wrong?" Kagome felt herself growing concerned. "Did something happen to him?"_

_"What? Oh no, it's just...well...you have to see it for yourself."_

_The slayer led her to a clearing in the outskirts of the village. As Kagome watched she saw Inuyasha, along with a group of village children._

_"No fair Inuyasha! You didn't go as high that time!"_

_"I'm next!"_

_"No me!"_

_"Hey hey hey, one at a time. Everybody gets a turn." The dog-eared boy said with a smile on his face. He picked up a little girl and placed her on his shoulders, then jumped into the trees, leaping from tree to tree with practiced ease._

_"He's been doing it all morning." Sango told her, a look of endearment on her face._

...

"Their parents would have been so mad at you!" Kagome laughed, wiping her eyes. "You thought you were in trouble when you saw us. But we thought it was so cute we just told you to be careful."

Those were the days, before...

Kagome put the picture and ramen back in the bag and into her closet. She didn't want anything to do with Christmas anymore, and she couldn't stay here where everything reminded her of Inuyasha. With only a quick word to her mother she headed back to the feudal era.

Half an hour later she sat with Kaede at her home, drinking tea.

"He'll be found. You know how tough he is." Kaede tried to reassure her. She thought for a moment, then went into another room.

"I have something for you." she called out, carrying out a paper wrapped package.

"Inuyasha wanted to give it to you for this...Christmas thing you do in your time."

Kagome wiped her eyes, taking the package and opening it.

Inside was an outfit like Inuyasha wore, made of the red hair of the firerat. The only difference was the sleeves were embroidered with a wavy purple pattern.

Kagome's mouth hung open. "Where did he...?"

"He made them, with only a little help from myself. He said you sometimes get hurt, and he wanted you to be better protected." The old miko told her. She put a hand on the girl's shoulder. "Look on the inside of the collar."

Kagome pulled it up and looked. There, stitched on the inside were the words For Kagome, From Inuyasha.

"I've been teaching him to read and write too." Kaede admitted. "He wanted to surprise you."

Kagome dripped tears onto the clothes as she held them and smiled. It was the most thoughtful gift anyone had ever given her...

_"No one would miss you if you never came back!"_

"I don't deserve this." she handed it back to Kaede.

"What? Why would you think that?"

"I'm a horrible person! Now he's gone and it's all my fault!" Kagome ran out of the house, Kaede sadly watching her go.

'Inuyasha, you must come back to us. It will destroy Kagome if you don't.'

...

Kagome stood before the sacred tree as the sun set. It had snowed lightly, covering the ground with a thin layer of white powder.

"Inuyasha, I've said most of this in my head what feels like a million times." She began, closing her eyes for a moment. "Maybe saying it out loud here, where you slept for fifty years, I can pretend that somehow you'll hear it."

She felt the tears spill down her cheeks, quickly turning from warm to cold as she hung her head in shame.

"I'm sorry for what I said. I do miss you. I miss hearing your voice. I miss how you would carry me on your back. I always felt so safe in your arms. Like nothing could ever hurt me when I'm with you."

She sniffed, opening her eyes.

"I'm sorry that I hurt you because of my pride and immaturity. And not just this one time."

The tears reached her chin, dropping to the snow-covered ground.

"I hurt you in other ways. I used the beads in anger to hurt you for petty reasons, sometimes no reason at all. I avoided telling Koga that I don't want to be with him, because I knew it made you jealous whenever he came around. I guess I thought of it as some sort of revenge for Kikyo...as if it was your fault you met her first."

Kagome placed her forehead against the tree.

"And now you're missing, maybe hurt or dead, all because of me. You have every right to hate me. I can only ask for your forgiveness, even though I know I don't deserve it."

She wiped her eyes and looked up.

"But I really do appreciate all that you do. You're the bravest, most selfless person I've ever known. You put your life on the line all the time. Not just for us, but for total strangers. And you never complain or ask for a reward."

Kagome stepped back from the tree.

"There's something else I need to tell you, something I can only wish I'd had the courage to say when you were here. I love you Inuyasha. I've loved you for a long time now. That's why it hurt so bad when I saw you with Kikyo. I know that doesn't excuse what I've done to you, how I've acted. I had my chance, and I let it slip through my fingers. But I want you to know I'll never stop looking for you. We went to all of the villages we've saved to get help. Hundreds of people are looking for you now, and many more are praying for your safety. I even got Koga's clan to help out. If you're still out there, we'll find you. And once we do I'm going to take off those beads. You'll be free. You won't have to stay with me anymore. Just knowing you're safe will have to be enough for me."

She heard a sound behind her, before turning to see Miroku and Sango.

"How...how long have you two been listening?"

Sango slowly approached her, looking on her without any of the anger that had defined their interactions for these last two weeks. "Long enough." She put her hand on the sacred tree.

"Inuyasha," she began. "Thank you. Thank you for your forgiveness. When we first met and I was being tricked by Naraku, I almost killed you. You immediately forgave me, when you could have killed me and been justified in defending yourself. Later on I took your Tessaiga and tried to give it to Naraku in exchange for Kohaku's life. But even then you refused to condemn me. You never even brought it up again. You treated me as if I'd never done anything to betray your trust. I can never repay you for your mercy, but I'm going to try."

Sango looked to Kagome.

"You would forgive anyone. I'd bet you'd even forgive Sesshomaru for all he's done to you if you thought he regretted it. And that's how I know you'll forgive Kagome."

Kagome gave a small smile at that, then stood back as Miroku approached the sacred tree.

"I admit, I took you for granted myself. How many of our battles have we won on your strength alone? But I want you too know that even though I sometimes tease you, I have nothing but respect for you, and I'm proud to call you my friend."

He let out a breath, watching as it came out as fog in the chill air. "The truth is, before I met you I had no hope for the future. I thought at best I could father a child to carry on the fight before dying from my curse. But seeing you, how you never accept fate, you gave me hope that maybe I can survive all of this after all. Maybe my destiny isn't an early death. Maybe we really can win. That's why you have to come back to us."

Kagome smiled at her two friends. "Thank you both. It means a lot to..."

He words were cut off by Sango pointing behind her. There, in the distance, was one of Kikyo's soul collectors carrying a soul for it's mistress.

"Kikyo must be in the area." Miroku said, even though it was obvious to the two girls.

Kagome frowned. "To bad with all of the power she put in the spell on those beads, she didn't think to have them able to track him..."

Her eyes suddenly lit up, and she turned and headed in the direction the soul collector had gone, ignoring the shouts of her companions.


	4. Sacrifice

Chapter 4: Sacrifice

Kikyo wasn't sure why she had wandered near her old village. Maybe it had just been an accident? Maybe she had wanted to remember happier times? But for now such questions weren't at the forefront of her mind. She had a much more pressing need.

She was hungry.

She looked up as one of her soul collectors returned with one of the treasured glowing, wispy orbs. Kikyo grabbed the soul and pulled it into her body, feeling it's power flow through her, reviving her clay flesh. She knew that come the morning she would hate herself. Even now as hungry as she was there was a small spark of guilt associated with the act of devouring a soul. But she knew well that she would be hungry again in a few days, and would once again send out her soul collectors to gather more souls to sustain her unliving flesh.

Sometimes Kikyo tried to tell herself that it was all for the greater good. That only she could destroy Naraku and that was worth any price. Sometimes she almost believed it. But ultimately that was a lie and she knew it. She simply didn't want to die again, and would do anything to preserve even this horrid mockery of life.

"Kikyo!"

The undead miko was suddenly jolted out of her thoughts. From behind some bushes her double appeared, quite out of breath. "I need to speak with you!"

Kikyo looked impassively at the strangely dressed girl. "What do you want?" she finally asked before drawing another soul into herself.

Kagome cringed, briefly wondering who that soul had belonged too as it disappeared into Kikyo. "It's Inuyasha. He was kidnapped two weeks ago and I want...I need your help to find him."

Kikyo was unmoved. "Why should I help you? Or him?" The bitterness and scorn in her voice made Kagome take a step back. "He has made his choice. Anyone can see that."

Kagome took a deep breath. She'd known this would be difficult. But at least Kikyo hadn't attempted to kill her. Yet. That was an improvement.

"Because I know you still love him." Kagome pleaded. "I know because I feel that love too. We share a soul, whether you like it or not."

"You know nothing about me child." Kikyo turned to leave.

"And because I can offer you something." Kagome quickly added. "Something you want more than anything." She had hoped that Kikyo would help out of the goodness of her heart, but it was pretty clear that wasn't going to be the case.

The undead miko paused. "What could you possibly have to interest me?"

Kagome took a breath. "I can give you life."

Kikyo turned back to her, staring at the girl. "That's impossible."

"No it isn't. I'll use the jewel to wish you alive again." Kagome explained.

Kikyo was actually surprised. She had her own plans for the jewel, to use it to destroy Naraku. She had never even considered the possibility that someone else might use the jewel to benefit her. Could this girl truly be that selfless?

To be alive again. To no longer have to devour souls. To feel heat and cold. To taste food. To breath. To do all of the things that the living took for granted...

"Are you serious? I'm...I'm not even sure if that would work." Kikyo admitted after a few moments.

"If it could turn Inuyasha human, maybe it can do the same for you?" Kagome said as she approached the dead girl. "It's worth a try, isn't it?"

Kikyo thought for a moment. "That would still require Naraku's death. He has most of the jewel."

'Because you gave it to him.' Kagome grumbled in her thoughts. "Well, with you working with our group he won't stand a chance! You'll be alive again in no time!"

Kikyo studied the younger girl. True, it might work. But there was something else she wanted if she was going to live again.

She wanted Inuyasha.

"I have a further condition. Once I'm alive again, you take the jewel to your time and never return."

Kagome felt like her heart had stopped. She'd already known that Inuyasha would be furious with her, even hate her, once he was back. But she had still held out hope that maybe, somehow, she would be able to make it up to him. Kikyo had just slammed the door on that hope.

"I...I..." Kagome stammered. She'd know she would have to sacrifice to get Kikyo's help. But to never see Inuyasha again...

Maybe it was for the best? Inuyasha loved Kikyo, right? He had been through so much in his life, who was she to deny him his happiness?

'He would do it for you. He tried to do it for you when he pushed you through the well and tried to seal it.' she thought. 'You owe it to him.'

She felt like throwing up as the words left her mouth. "Alright, I promise to take the jewel to my time and never return. But only once Inuyasha is safe and we've defeated Naraku."

Kikyo nodded, slowly walking towards Kagome as she slung her bow over her shoulder. "What do you need me for?"

"The spell on the beads. You cast it right?" Kagome asked her. "Can you change the spell on them to allow me to track Inuyasha?"

Kikyo shook her head. "You don't know what you're asking. To lay a spell is one thing. To change one already in place would require so much power...I don't think even I have that much."

Kagome wasn't about to give up. "But what if you, me, and Kaede worked together? Would that be enough power?"

Kikyo looked up at the suggestion. Working together? She had never even considered... "Maybe."

"Well we have to try." Kagome motioned Kikyo to follow her. "We all owe it to Inuyasha."

...

'The old village hasn't changed much.' Kikyo noted as she followed the three towards her old shrine. Sure there were a few new homes she thought, but nothing too out of place from fifty years ago.

That was until she saw Kaede. Her baby sister, now an old woman. Even though she had seen her before, when she had been brought back by the witch, it was still a shocking reminder about just how much time had passed.

"Kikyo?" Kaede asked, her one eye staring wide. "Why...why are you here?"

"Kaede..."

Sometimes, after she had eaten a few souls and her hunger had gone down to a tolerable level, Kikyo could think about other things besides revenge. Now she found herself briefly wondering how Kaede had grown up. Their parents died when Kaede was an infant, and Kikyo had raised her sister since she was only a child herself.

'Were you happy Kaede? Did you miss me? Why didn't it occur to me to ask about you until just now?'

She quickly banished those thoughts. "I have come to find Inuyasha. I intend to change the spell on the beads to a tracking spell. I'll need your help."

...

Sango and Miroku sat outside of the shrine, Shippo between the two of them.

"Kikyo isn't gonna try to take Kagome's soul is she?" The kitsune asked Sango, clearly worried.

'I wouldn't put it past her.' Sango thought, forcing herself to smile and humor the little boy. "Don't worry Shippo. We'll stop her if she tries anything."

Miroku nodded. "Hey Shippo, can you go get Kirara? I need to discuss something with Sango."

The kitsune raised an eyebrow, then shrugged and headed to find the fire cat.

"What's this about?" The slayer asked, keeping her eyes on his hands. But he made no move to grope her.

"Sango," he began, giving her an uncharacteristically serious look. "In a few days I have to be setting out on my journey again. With or without Inuyasha."

The dark-haired girl was silent as she processed this. "Because of your curse?" she guessed.

The monk nodded. "Please don't be angry with me. I have to continue the search for Naraku. I can't stay here any longer."

Sango looked at him for a moment, then threw her arms around him. "I understand. You've done everything you could searching for Inuyasha."

Miroku closed his eyes as he hugged her back. "Will you join me?"

Sango blinked, then pulled away with a sad look. "I can't. Not until I see Inuyasha again."

"Why?" He asked.

"Because of a promise I made to him." she sighed. "A promise to take care of him if his other half becomes dominant."

Miroku's face took on a serious cast again. "Do you mean...?"

Sango nodded, opening her side pouch, removing the wooden box, and showing him the vial of green liquid. "It's from my village, a formula known only to the elders. This is the last vial in existence. One drop of this coating a blade would be enough for a youkai ten times his size."

The monk turned the vial over in his hand. "You promised him?"

"If he's completely lost to his youkai side. If he's too far gone for the Tessaiga to seal his youkai blood and all that's left is a raging beast." She explained.

Miroku closed his eyes, then sighed and nodded before handing it back to her. "It's the right thing to do. It's the only thing to do if it comes to that. But if you do this, you know Kagome will never forgive you."

Sango nodded sadly before placing the vial back in it's box and putting the box back in her side pouch. "I know." She placed her arms back around him, laying her head on his chest. "Will you stay with me for a few minutes? I don't want to be alone right now."

Miroku grinned, leaning down and kissing the top of her head. "Of course."

...

The three miko's had been at work for almost an hour. Kikyo and Kaede did most of the talking, discussing concepts far above Kagome's head. Now she wished she's paid more attention to her grandfather's talks. From what little she could understand it was possible to change the spell on the beads. But for some reason Kaede didn't want to do it.

"So, can it be done?" She finally asked.

"Yes, but there's a problem." Kaede explained. "The only way to make it work will bind you even closer to him."

Kagome had a feeling she wasn't going to like what Kaede had to say next. "What...what do you mean?"

Kaede took Kagome's hands in hers as Kikyo watched. 'Kaede...you see her as the daughter you never had, don't you?'

"You will sense his emotions." Kaede paused. "You will feel his pain..."

Kagome looked into Kaede's good eye. Inuyasha was so tough that he could be impaled through the chest and be up walking the next day. But she was just a human. One who hissed in pain if she pulled on a tangle while brushing her hair.

She shook her head. There was no choice. Inuyasha needed to be found now. Inuyasha had always been the one who had to make sacrifices. Sacrifice his abilities to be with Kikyo. Put his life on the line for Kagome. It was time someone sacrificed for him.

She nodded that she understood. "Do it!"

The three of them sat in a circle. Kaede, Kikyo, and Kagome all began to chant as one. For a moment a blue, ethereal image of the beads appeared around Kagome's own neck.

Then the pain began.

Kagome had thought she had prepared herself. She thought that whatever Inuyasha had gone through couldn't be as bad as the dozens of scenarios that had run through her mind. She had even allowed herself to entertain the fantasy that maybe Inuyasha would be found unhurt, with his arms crossed and grumpily demanding to know what took them so long.

She was wrong.

Kagome screamed as she fell to the floor, drawing Miroku, Sango, and Shippo. Her friends gathered around her, all talking at once as she writhed.

It was nearly five minutes before the girl's mind was clear enough to make out the individual sensations from the generalized feeling of agony. She felt like she hadn't eaten in weeks. Beyond that her right eye felt swollen, as if she had been punched in it, and her back felt like a mass of raw flesh so mistreated that even the light touch of Kaede's hand sent a searing fire through her.

"Get back!"

All hands withdrew from Kagome. She slowly dragged herself to her feet, eyes blazing with anger and pain.

"Kagome..." Kaede began, only to be cut off.

"They're starving him." Kagome said out loud. "And beating him, right now. And they've done something to his mind, something in his water." She pointed a shaky hand to the west. "That way!" She began to walk out of the room, limping painfully. "Sango, call Kirara!"

Kikyo watched her slowly and painfully mount the fire cat, then fly off on it along with her slayer friend. Despite herself, she admired the girl's courage.

'Would I have done this for Inuyasha, even if I knew I had to give him up?'

"Come on!" The monk shouted to her, the kitsune on his shoulder. "We can follow them."

...

Kikyo was silent as she, along with the monk and kitsune, followed the two girls and fire cat. Finally she spoke.

"Monk?"

"Miroku." He replied. "My name is Miroku."

"The beads on your wrist, what are they for?"

Miroku sighed. "My grandfather was cursed by Naraku with a hole in his hand that consumed everything around it. When he died the curse passed to my father, and when he was consumed by it, it passed to me."

Kikyo nodded. "Is that why you travel with Inuyasha? To defeat Naraku?"

"That's one reason." Miroku said. "The other is that he is my friend. We help each other out."

"And the girls?"

"They have names too. Sango and Kagome." He told her.

"And I'm Shippo." The kitsune glared at her. "And you'd better not try to hurt Kagome again!"

Kikyo ignored him. "Why do they follow Inuyasha?"

"Sango's village was massacred by youkai sent by Naraku, and he has turned her younger brother into a mind-controlled slave." He said. "At first Naraku tricked Sango into thinking Inuyasha had done it. She attacked him, but he spared her life. They've become close friends since then."

Kikyo was silent for a moment. "And the other girl...Kagome?"

Miroku looked over his shoulder at her. "Kagome follows Inuyasha because she loves him. She loves him so much, that she's willing to give him up to you." His voice lowered on the word you.

"Your contempt for me is obvious." she said. "Perhaps I deserve it."

"Not contempt. Pity." Miroku corrected her. "I pity you. I mourn for the person you once were. I mourn for the life you could have had, had you only accepted Inuyasha as he is instead of trying to change him into what you wanted him to be."

"Are you blaming me for what Naraku has done?" Kikyo demanded.

"No. But you certainly made things easier for him." Miroku said. "You're the one who decided Inuyasha was unworthy of your love unless he was human. You're the one who immediately assumed he'd turned on you. You're the one who gave the jewel to Naraku, leading to the release of his youkai side."

"Wait. What do you mean the release of his youkai side?"

Miroku paused mid-step. "You really don't know?"

"No, what do you mean?" Kikyo asked.

"Because you gave Naraku our jewel shards, he gained the ability to create new youkai." Shippo piped up. "They've killed a lot of people, and one of them broke Inuyasha's sword. It was holding back his youkai blood, but thanks to you he now goes mad if he's away from his sword and gets too badly hurt." The kitsune glared at her from his perch on Miroku's shoulder, tears in his eyes. "He killed some people last time it happened and it made him really sad. But what do you care? You only want to hurt him as much as you can anyway."

Kikyo stared at the kitsune. "I...I didn't think..."

"Don't even try!" The tiny boy cut her off. "I'll never forgive you for what you did to my friends! Let's get out of here Miroku."

Miroku watched Kikyo sink to her knees. Though he wished Shippo had been a bit more diplomatic about telling her, maybe this was for the best. Over Shippo's protests he offered her his hand.

"Come on, we still have to rescue Inuyasha. We can catch up with the others if we hurry."

Kikyo looked up at him, her eyes wide even though her body was incapable of real tears, and took his hand.


	5. Rescue?

Chapter 5: Rescue?

"Hurry up!"

"Don't push her. She's flying as fast as she can, but she still needs to save enough strength to take us back."

Kagome turned to Sango, her eyes filled with anger. "Don't fucking tell me what to do!"

The slayer said nothing as the other girl glared at her, before Kagome's eyes went wide and one hand flew to her mouth.

"Sango...I'm so sorry..." Her cheeks were pink with embarrassment. Kagome wasn't usually one to curse. She didn't think she'd said that particular word out loud before once in her whole life. Why had it just sprung to her lips like that?

"It's alright." Sango quickly replied. "Kaede did say that while bonded with Inuyasha like this you're going to feel a lot of his personality and emotions and might do or say things you wouldn't normally do."

Kagome nodded her head before reaching down and patting Kirara's side. "But I'm still sorry. And I'm sorry to you too Kirara."

Although Kagome had grown more-or-less desensitized to it by now, Inuyasha's dirty mouth had gotten on her nerves at first (though to his credit lately he had seemed to notice her disapproval of his cursing and made an effort to reign it in). At one point she had joked with herself that she just might consider washing his mouth out with soap like swearing children got in old books and movies. That was until she had learned more of his past. Afterwards she guessed it was a combination of the natural desire of all children to seem grow up by engaging in taboo behavior, and losing his mother at a young age. He had probably picked up the bad habit as a boy, and never had anyone around to tell him to stop.

And there she went, thinking about his past again.

She usually tried not to dwell on it, both because it made her sad and because Inuyasha clearly didn't like the topic, but it was heart-wrenching when she thought about Inuyasha's childhood. She couldn't help imagining a tiny Inuyasha all alone in a world that hated him just for existing. Hiding from youkai and humans, shivering in the cold, with no one to hold him when he was sad or upset. It made her want to hug him and tell him everything would be okay, that she wouldn't let anyone hurt him.

Kagome shook her head. She might as well forget about it. She'd had her chance with him and she'd carelessly thrown it away. Inuyasha was going to be with Kikyo now. Kikyo would give him all of the love and support he needed.

...As much as a woman who had tried to kill him twice could.

...And tried to kill her.

...And tried to drag him to hell.

...And ate souls like they were cups of ramen.

Well, maybe she would get better once she was human again?

Kagome was suddenly pulled out of her thoughts by a sudden pain over her left eye that made her scream. The rest of the pain had lessened to a general ache, but this was hot and fresh.

"Kagome?" Sango grabbed her shoulders. "You okay?"

"Someone just kicked him in the face." She mumbled. "Let's hurry. I want to hurt these people badly..."

Sango looked around as they flew over a forest in the light if the full moon. This was the same forest they had lost Inuyasha in.

"Kagome, we already searched here..."

Kagome looked back at her. "I know, but he's close...Wait a minute!" She turned to Sango and grabbed her shoulders.

"Do you remember why we went to this forest in the first place?"

"Of course." Sango replied. "A man approached us when we were staying at in the last village saying that there was a possible jewel shard in here..." Her eyes widened. "Oh...Oh no..."

"Someone wanted us to come here just so they could kidnap Inuyasha." Kagome said out loud what they were both thinking. "And I fell for it."

"We fell for it." Sango corrected her. ""We all did."

Kagome faced forwards and scanned the area. "Down there Kirara." she pointed to a heavily wooded section of the forest. The firecat growled to confirm and headed down through the trees, until she landed on the ground in front of an overgrown stone fort. The structure was so overtaken by the forest that it was entirely hidden when viewed from above, and one could have walked right past it thinking it's outer walls were a natural rock outcropping. The perfect camouflage.

"Halt!"

A man appeared on the wall, his bow trained on them. "State your business!"

Kagome reached for her bow with a growl, her lips curling to reveal her teeth, before Sango grabbed her wrist. "We don't know how many they are. Let's see if we can do this without bloodshed."

"We have come for Inuyasha." Sango called back.

"There is no one here by that name." The guard replied. "Please leave."

"WE KNOW HE'S IN THERE!" Kagome drew an arrow and pulled back her bowstring. Willing all of her anger into the arrow she let it fly, hitting the stone wall and exploding, blowing a hole through it. The guard stared wide-eyed, his mouth hanging open.

"THE NEXT ONE GOES UP YOUR ASS!" Kagome yelled, no longer even noticing she had Inuyasha's mannerisms. "WHERE IS HE?"

The guard ducked and sounded an alarm. "We have intruders!" Instantly men began pouring out of the old fort, about twenty in all. Sango pulled her hiraikotsu from her back, Kirara at her side.

"I didn't know you could do that."

Kagome readied another arrow. "Neither did I."

...

"It's no use." Miroku finally admitted. "We can't keep up with them. I can't even see them anymore."

"They took a left turn here."

Miroku looked to Kikyo as he remembered. "Ah, you can sense Kagome's jewel shards."

Kikyo nodded. "Let's hurry."

As they walked Kikyo avoided looking at the monk. Every time her eyes traveled up she saw the little kitsune boy on his shoulders and feared meeting his accusing gaze again. She was still trying to process everything he had told her.

Inuyasha's youkai side was loose? It took over his body sometimes? All because of a broken sword?

"Keep your wits about you Kikyo." Miroku said, drawing her out of her thoughts. "Naraku could choose this moment to spring a trap if he's learned of Inuyasha's kidnapping."

Kikyo scanned the area. "I don't sense any jewel shards in the area besides the child's."

"Kagome." Miroku corrected her. "He could still have created a spawn to target us without getting his hands dirty. It's happened to us before."

The undead miko thought on that. "Does that happen often?"

"Ever since you gave him our jewel shards just to hurt us." Shippo glared at her.

"I have my reasons." Kikyo replied, only just then realizing she was trying to justify her actions to a child. A youkai child. One she didn't even know.

"Yeah I know, you want to make Inuyasha suffer and you don't care who else gets killed." Shippo accused her.

"That is not why I did it!"

Miroku quickly turned and put his hand over Shippo's mouth while giving him a 'knock it off' look.

"Kikyo, I admit it does look bad on your end. Inuyasha told us he didn't think you were evil, but to willingly help Naraku is a vile act."

"I am not helping him!" Kikyo protested louder than she had meant to. She took a breath to calm down, a habit she had developed back when she still needed to breathe. "I'm setting a trap."

Miroku gave her a puzzled look. "I don't understand."

"Once Naraku has the completed jewel I will purify him and it out of existence." She explained.

Or rather that had been the plan until just a little over an hour and a half ago...

"What makes you so sure it will work out that way?" The monk demanded. "How do you know he won't gain further powers? Powers that could make your abilities useless? And I have to admit, Shippo does make a point. His spawn have killed hundreds, maybe even thousands."

Shippo squirmed free of Miroku's grip. "Don't bother." The boy told him, glaring at Kikyo with tears shining in his eyes. The loss of his friend over these two weeks had been hard on him, as was to be expected. "The lives of others mean nothing to her. She's the only one who matters and everyone else might as well not exist."

"Monk..." Kikyo began, her voice cold. "Tell your pet to be silent before I decide to purify it."

Miroku held Shippo in front of him, made the boy face him, and gave what he hoped was a 'stern father' look. "Shippo, enough."

The kitsune sniffled, burying his face in Miroku's shoulder. Kikyo was surprised at the tenderness between them. It had been so long since she had felt anything like that. Only her bond to Inuyasha gave her anything remotely close to that anymore, and even then when he embraced her it wasn't the same as when she had been alive.

'But I can live again once I have the jewel. I can get back everything that was stolen from me. I can have all of the things I was denied in life.'

She hoped that all sounded more convincing than it did in her head.

...

Although no atheist (it was rather hard to disbelieve in the supernatural when you rode on a fire cat and exterminated rampaging youkai as a profession), Sango didn't consider herself particularly religious. Her training took up most of the time she might have otherwise devoted to it. Despite that she had picked up a few things throughout her young life. Honoring ancestors was important, the soul was reincarnated after death (usually), and killing humans was bad karma and she should try not to do so if it could be avoided. And usually that wasn't a problem since their group rarely faced a human that Inuyasha (or indeed she herself) couldn't easily overpower like a child and put in his place.

But now, with twenty men running towards her, it looked like she might have to take on some bad karma. As she readied her hiraikotsu she offered a silent prayer of apology to whatever kami might be listening.

"Now now, there's no reason for all of this."

Kagome saw the guards pause, then open their ranks to reveal a man. He wore the rich clothes of nobility, but they were faded, stained, and looked a size too small. His hair was tied back behind him, and he carried a sword at his side. He looked untrustworthy, brutal, and selfish. Though her mother had always taught her to not judge based on first impressions, Kagome was pretty sure he really was all of those things.

"I am Renzo." The man said. "Why have you blown a hole in my wall?"

"We're here for Inuyasha." Sango replied, still ready to throw her hiraikotsu if he tried anything. "Long silver hair, dog ears. Where is he?"

"The dog?" He asked. "I'm training it for it's new master. That's what I do."

"Training? Master?" Kagome repeated as if the words were utterly foreign to her. "You...you're a slave trader?"

"That's right." Renzo told her. "I specialize in hanyou slaves."

That was when it really hit her. He was no superpowered youkai. No priest or monk filled with spiritual powers. He was just a man, like anyone else, who wanted to make a profit and didn't care what he had to do to get it.

She angrily drew an arrow. "You son of a bitch!"

"Kagome no!" Sango grabbed her bow. "We're not here to fight a war. We're here to get Inuyasha."

Renzo seemed to consider his options for a moment.

"Alright. You can have it."

Kagome paused. "Are you serious? Just like that?"

"Yes." Renzo nodded. "I clearly am no match for the three of you. I might as well cut my losses." He held up his hands. "Follow me to the cells where I keep my merchandise."

The girls and fire cat slowly approached him. "And why should we trust you?" Sango asked.

The slaver grinned, then drew his sword and laid it on the ground. "I am unarmed, and no monk. What can I do against you three?"

Kagome remembered something she'd seen in an old movie. "Sango, you in front of him. Me behind him. Kirara, you behind me. If any of us see him do anything suspicious, don't hesitate."

The four of them lined up as Kagome had ordered, with Renzo waving off his guards even though Kagome had an arrow drawn and pointed at his back.

"Does it bother you at all to do this?" Kagome asked him as they entered the fort. A few torches burned, but it was still darker than the full moon outside.

"Should it?" Renzo said, answering her question with another question.

"Yes!" Kagome yelled. "You're selling people into slavery! Don't you get it?"

"Hanyous, not people." He corrected her with a laugh. "I don't do people anymore. There's no market for it when a lord can just take whatever peasants he wants and do whatever with them all on his own without paying anyone. I had to find a new market, so I settled on luxury goods."

"These 'goods' are sapient beings!" Kagome hissed, ready to let her arrow fly into his back.

Renzo shrugged. "That's only your opinion."

Kagome was about to say more when Sango suddenly stopped before a metal door. Kagome pushed past her, sensing Inuyasha was near. She saw that on a hook next to the door hung a fearsome-looking whip that, upon closer inspection, was studded with nails braided into the leather thongs, and covered in dried blood. In the middle of the room was a stone block that Kagome had to stare at for a moment before realizing what it was for.

Kagome shook her head. 'Concentrate Kagome. Inuyasha needs you.'

As fear filled her she struggled to hold it down. She had come for Inuyasha and there was no way she'd leave without him. Mustering all of her courage she slid the door open.

The first thing that hit her was the stench. It was the distinctive smell of prisoners being kept in less-than-sanitary conditions. A combination of unwashed flesh and waste left to rot. Then a millisecond later the signals from her eyes reached her brain.

Sango gasped, her hand covering her mouth. Kirara growled in anger. Kagome could only stare, her mind almost refusing to believe what she saw.

It was Inuyasha. It was really him. After all of her agony, he was really here.

She almost wished he wasn't.

Inuyasha lay curled into a ball on the floor. He was nude, and looked to be much thinner than she remembered. His hair was matted with filth and dried blood. His back was covered in cuts from his shoulders down to his thighs, fresh cuts overlapping with old ones.

"Kagome he's tricked us." Sango said, breaking her out of her shock. "I can't move."

Kagome tried to move, finding it impossible. Her limbs simply refused to obey her. And judging by the growls coming from Kirara she couldn't move either.   
Renzo laughed and rubbed his hands together. "This little trap was worth the price I paid for it." He tapped the stone floor with his foot, causing a line of red static to run across it. "No one may walk across this room without my permission."

As the girls and Kirara struggled he slowly approached them, inspecting them like they were livestock.

"This is my lucky day. I'm sure I can still find someone willing to pay for pretty girls." He said, running his hands along the length of Sango's body. "Especially one so...strong..." The slayer cringed in disgust.

Renzo left her, walking over to Kirara. "And I'll turn your fire cat into a rug."

"You won't get away with this!" Kagome yelled.

The slaver grinned at her. "I can see you will require a lot of training to serve your future master. I'm looking forward to breaking you like I broke the dog."

"His name is Inuyasha!" Kagome yelled, looking to the boy who still lay on the floor. "Inuyasha! Get up! What's wrong with you?"

The slaver laughed, holding out his hand. "Come here dog!"

And as Kagome watched in horror Inuyasha crawled over to the man, his efforts pained and slow. She saw the chains he wore at his wrists glow in the darkness, and guessed what they were for.

"Inuyasha..."

The boy paid her no mind as he knelt before the slaver and began to lick his outstretched hand. The slaver flashed her another grin, then backhanded Inuyasha to the floor. Kagome felt the pain at the same moment, trying in vain to reach her cheek.

"Dog! Stay until I return!" He shouted before walking out and slamming the door, leaving them in darkness. Inuyasha pulled himself to a sitting position and stared straight ahead, his eyes glazed over, not even seeing them.

...

Minutes ticked by. Kagome begged. She pleaded. She sobbed.

But nothing seemed to rouse the slightest emotion in Inuyasha. She felt only the pain, but no thought, no feelings.

"Sango..." she looked to the slayer. "I think he's really gone. I failed. I was too late."

Sango wanted to comfort her, to somehow make everything better. "No! Not now! Not like this!"

There had to be something that could break through to Inuyasha! Something that was so fundamental to him that nothing could drive it from his mind.

"Inuyasha! Remember your mother!"

The boy's ears twitched slightly. Kagome felt a hint of emotion in him as clearly as she could pain.

"Your mother loved you Inuyasha!" Sango shouted. "She always loved you!"

"She died to protect you!" Kagome joined her. "She wouldn't want this for you! You have to come back! For her, for all of us! I need you! We need you!"

Inuyasha crawled over to Kagome, grabbing her clothes and slowly pulling himself to his knees with them. He looked up at her, as if he were a dog trying to comprehend a human's words.

"I love you Inuyasha! I love you so much! That's why I agreed to Kikyo's terms for her help to find you!" She yelled, tears falling down her cheeks. "I agreed to give you up to her if it means you can be safe!"

Sango was about to protest that arraignment, had something much more important not drawn her attention.

Inuyasha was pulling himself to his feet. He stood unsteadily, swaying slightly.

"Inuyasha?"

"Ka...go...me?"

He was suddenly jerked back to the ground by Renzo. "What the fuck do you think you're doing dog?!"

"Leave him alone!" Kagome pleaded as the slaver grabbed the whip and threw Inuyasha over the flogging block.

"You! Will! Obey!" He shouted, punctuating each word with a crack of the whip across Inuyasha's bare back. Kagome screamed at each blow, the pain clouding her vision.

'Obey Master...Protect Kagome...Master...Kagome...Kagome!'

Inuyasha howled in pain, clutching his head as he rolled off the block.

Kagome howled too, but her cries weren't just of pain. They were also of fear. "STOP! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING!"

Renzo grabbed him by the shoulder, intending to throw him right back over the flogging block.

He didn't get the chance. A clawed hand smashed into his chest, sending him onto his back. As he tried to comprehend what had happened he saw the dog stand before him.

He was a figure out of nightmare. Fangs protruded from his mouth. Magenta markings decorated his cheeks. But worst of all were his eyes. Fiery red orbs of rage and lunatic glee.

"What the...?"

With a roar that rang in the ears Inuyasha pulled hard on the shackles, shattering the chain between the cuffs. Immediately he felt his full strength return. He grabbed the slaver by the neck and slammed him against the wall before he could revoke his permission to move, leaving Inuyasha unaffected by the spell.

"No! Please! You...you can go! Just please don't hurt me!" Renzo pleaded in sheer terror of the creature. Inuyasha laughed, removing his right hand from the man's neck.

"Thank you..." Renzo began, before screaming in pain. Inuyasha stared into the man's eyes as he pressed his clawed hand to the right of Renzo's rib cage, pushing until he heard a snap as every rib broke. The slaver screamed, pleading for mercy as Inuyasha moved to the opposite side and broke it in the same way. Inuyasha's hand tore through Renzo's stomach, traveling upwards. He grinned as he found his target, pulling out something that Sango recognized a moment before Kagome as his heart.

Renzo was of course dead. Inuyasha turned to the three beings in front of him and sniffed the air. His laughed and howled, running in their direction...and going right past them in search of fresh prey.

....

A few moments later the three of them suddenly fell to the ground as the spell ended. Maybe it had masked their presence from Inuyasha? Maybe it had ended because of the death of the man who paid for it? Those were questions for later.

"Come on!" Sango pulled Kagome to her feet and along with Kirara they headed after Inuyasha.


	6. Rampage

Chapter 6: Rampage

Before she had come to the feudal era, Kagome thought she knew death.

But that had been sanitized death. While the dead were to be honored and respected and missed, death itself had been held at arm's length. Her father had died when she was young, and she still remembered looking at his body as it lay under his picture at the wake. He was made up to look like he was sleeping. Like he was going to open up his eyes any moment and ask what they were all crying about. Her grandmother's funeral had been much the same.

From her first few days in the feudal era, however, Kagome had been introduced to a side of death that many people in her time chose to ignore. Death in this time wasn't something that happened in the hospital after the doctors had explained to her mother that her father was brain dead and she agreed to take him off of life support. Death wasn't her grandmother going to sleep and never waking up after a long life.

For many in this time, death was sudden pain or slow suffering. As she and Inuyasha had gone to get Kaede after the fight with Yura (why he had partially buried her she'd never understand) they had come across a corpse sitting against a tree. It's head had rolled off to the side, having been neatly severed in one cut by Yura's hair. Inuyasha had barely noticed, walking over the corpse like it was simply another obstacle. But she had screamed in fear.

Inuyasha had looked around, wondering if they were being attacked. After smelling nothing he'd told her to knock it off. When she had protested he had simply shrugged. To him violent death was an everyday thing. It was as inevitable as the sunset.

As their journey had continued Kagome got even more familiar with death. She had seen slaughtered villages. She had helped bury bodies. She had killed youkai and knew the day might come where she had to kill a human. And while she didn't think she had exactly gotten used to it (or that she wanted to get used to it), she had accepted it.

Surely now she knew what death was?

But as she exited the slaver's fort with Sango and Kirara, Kagome realized that there was still more to death than she thought.

Blood was all over the ground, the walls, even dripping from the trees. There wasn't a complete body in sight, just a few barely identifiable pieces scattered among piles of shredded flesh and bone. The sheer violence of the attack went beyond anything she had seen. Even Sango had gasped. This wasn't the work of a youkai that had been hungry and saw humans as food. This was the work of a monster consumed with bloodlust, who hadn't been satisfied at merely killing his victims.

"How...?" Sango finally said, her tone telling Kagome that she too had never seen anything like this. "Even his youkai form has never been this violent..."

Kagome finally found her voice. "I felt something before through the beads. They'd put something in his water to weaken his will." She paused. "They probably never tested what it would do on a full youkai."

Sango's eyes widened. "The others, they were following us! We have to get to him before they do!"

Together the three of them ran as fast as they could from the massacre.

...

"What was that?"

Miroku paused as the kitsune on his shoulder's ears perked up. Besides them Kikyo drew an arrow.

"Something's coming." she said.

The three of them looked to the thick forest in front of them as four men came rushing out, all screaming at once in sheer terror.

"You gotta hide me!"

"Help!"

"Monster!"

"Monk! Help us!"

Kikyo lowered her bow as the four men tried to talk at once. She was about to ask them what was going on, when a howl the likes of which she had never heard before tore the air. The men screamed and ran right past the three of them as a nightmarish figure exploded from the trees.

Kikyo thought her own long-missing heart might have stopped at it's appearance. The thing resembled a nude male covered in gore. It's eyes glowed red as it roared and foamed at the mouth.

It was the embodiment of savagery, of bloodlust, of snarling animalistic rage.

It was Inuyasha.

The guards scattered, but they had no real chance of getting away. Howling, laughing, the youkai hunting them was a terrifying sight. He pounced from one to the other, tearing them to pieces.

The first man was decapitated so fast that his body kept walking for a step, blood spraying like a fountain from his severed neck, before slumping to the ground. The next screamed as a clawed hand tore through his back and came out his chest. A third was dashed against a tree so hard that Kikyo was sure she heard every bone in his body shattering before he collapsed into a heap. The fourth threw himself behind the three strangers.

"Inuyasha stop!" Kikyo threw up a barrier between them. Inuyasha snarled and pounded on the barrier as she struggled to hold it. Never before had she felt this much power! Each blow was draining more and more of her strength, while Inuyasha showed no signs of tiring. Why hadn't she devoured a few more souls for strength before leaving? "I can't keep this up much longer!"

Miroku looked sadly to his friend as he grabbed the beads over his cursed hand. "I'm sorry Inuyasha, you leave me no choice!" He pulled the beads, releasing the hole in his hand, trying to draw Inuyasha into it.

"Inuyasha stop! They're dead! It's over!"

Miroku quickly put the beads back in place as his three companions ran into the clearing. "Stay back!"

Inuyasha's clawed hand smashed through Kikyo's barrier as she collapsed to one knee. The next blow would surely shatter it completely.

"Kagome, subdue him!" Sango pleaded

Kagome flinched. She didn't want to do it, to cause him more pain, give him more reason not to trust her. But it was clear she had no choice.

'Forgive me Inuyasha.'

"SIT BOY!"

Inuyasha crashed to the ground. Kagome ran to him as Kikyo's barrier collapsed, leaving her on her hands and knees.   
Kagome reached out her hand slowly, trying not to startle him. "It's all over. It's alright now. You're safe." she said as calmly as she could manage. Forcing herself to hold back the tears. "We're here for you."

"Kagome stay back!"

Inuyasha lept back up and clawed at her. Had Sango not pulled her back by the collar of her uniform he would have taken her head off. "Do it again!"

"SIT BOY!"

Inuyasha was pushing against the spell, his eyes blazing with hatred and savagery.

"SIT BOY!"

Knowing they didn't have much time Miroku quickly tied Inuyasha's hands behind his back with ropes inscribed with words Kagome had seen on some of the monk's wards, while Sango tied his ankles together with the same. Inuyasha howled and struggled, but apparently Miroku's wards were of a higher quality than what the slaver had used as the ropes seemed to hold him for now. A gag was placed in his mouth to keep him from biting before Miroku and Sango lifted him up, each holding one arm. "Kagome, come get his feet."

"It's alright Inuyasha, you're going to be okay." Kagome told him as she lifted Inuyasha's feet. Damn it! How could she have been in such a hurry that she had left the Tessaiga back at Kaede's?

Together the three of them carried him over to Kirara and laid him over her back.

"She can't fit all of us." Sango said. "Miroku, you go with them. Keep your eye on those wards."

The monk nodded as he climbed on. Kagome held onto Inuyasha even as he struggled in his bonds before Kirara lifted into the air and headed for Kaede's village.

....

Kikyo stood up, watching as the kitsune ran to the slayer in tears. She looked to her side, seeing the guard who had hidden behind her barrier. He was only sixteen at most, barely a man.

"YOU!"

The slayer marched right towards her. Kikyo braced herself for another round of accusations, only for the slayer to walk right past her and grab the boy by the neck. "WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY FRIEND?"

"I-I-I was just a guard!" The boy pleaded. "My family needed the money!" He sobbed.

"I should kill you for what you did to him!" Sango shouted, grabbing the sword from her side.

"Please no!" The boy begged. "I'll do anything!"

"Sango...?" Shippo hopped onto her shoulder and put a tiny hand on her cheek. "This isn't what he would want."

Sango glared at the boy, then nodded sadly and let him fall. "You are going to tell me everything I want to know!"

As the boy groveled and scrapped Kikyo was lost in her own thoughts.

That thing had been Inuyasha.

That thing WAS Inuyasha.

"How...how did this happen?" She asked the slayer, hoping that the kitsune had been wrong and it wasn't really all her fault.

Sango ignored her as she interrogated the boy. "What did you do to Inuyasha?"

"The dog?" The boy stammered as he stood up before looking away as Sango glared. "The boss did most of the work. I just guarded it."

Sango swung at him, knocking the boy to the ground. "His name is Inuyasha! Say it!"

"I-Inuyasha!" The boy pleaded. "I saw the boss whip him, but that's all! I don't know about anything else I swear!"

The slayer picked him up off of the ground by his collar, holding his face to hers. "Now we're getting somewhere."

...

Throughout the ride back to Kaede's village Inuyasha struggled so much that at a few points Kagome worried he might fall off. She held him tight, ignoring the fact that he was covered in blood, while staying clear of his claws.

"Please be still Inuyasha. We're trying to help you."

It wasn't fair. He'd been through so much in his life, and now this. She was sure he'd be crushed when he found out he had killed all of those men, no matter how much they had deserved it. To say nothing of the trauma he must have endured over these last two weeks.

But she was going to help him. She was going to get him through all of this no matter what. It was the least she could do for him. And then she would let Kikyo have him just as she had promised. She ignored the pain that thought caused her, which truly was nothing compared to the sadness she felt for him after what he had been through.

"You're going to get better, I promise."

...

With some prodding by Shippo Sango had finally released the boy with a warning that if she ever caught him having anything to do with slaving again, what happened to the others would be nothing compared to what she would do to him. The boy had nodded and run off to the nearby village.

"Can you show me this fort?" Kikyo asked Sango after a moment.

Sango looked to her. "What? Why?"

"She probably wants to gloat." Shippo mumbled.

Kikyo ignored him. "I want to see what Inuyasha went through. I want to know what happened." Her tone held none of it's usual commanding edge. "Please. I know you want to get back to the others, but I must know."

Sango studied Kikyo. She knew she should hate this woman who had helped Naraku and tried to kill her friends. But the look in her eyes reminded her of the sadness she had seen in Kagome's eyes these last two weeks.

"Alright. Maybe you can find something to reverse whatever it was they put in his water."

The fort was, if anything, even more gruesome than Sango remembered. The stench was so strong that it made her dizzy just to approach it. Sango was glad she decided to stay outside with Shippo as Kikyo went in to see it for herself. He shouldn't see anything like the carnage in those walls. He'd already seen far to much in his life.

Sango noticed he was shivering, and pulled him close to her.

"Inuyasha's gonna be okay right?" He asked her, starting to cry again.

"Of course, don't you worry about it." She replied, forcing herself to hold back her own tears.

She looked up as Kikyo returned, a large red flower clutched in her hand.

"That was quick." she said.

Kikyo nodded, then sat on the snowy ground and hugged her knees.

"Do you know what this flower is?" she asked the slayer. Sango shook her head no.

"These flowers are a menace. A juice can be squeezed from them that, when fed to humans and I guess also hanyous, causes them to become weak minded and child-like. But youkai have a very different reaction."

"Berserk rage?" Sango guessed. "Inuyasha was already plenty berserk in his youkai form before."

"Yes." Kikyo said. "That would explain the savagery I saw in there."

"When will he come out of it?" Shippo asked her, the contempt gone from his expression.

Kikyo shook her head. "I don't know. It depends on how much they gave him."

She suddenly stood, turning from them as she began to walk. "Let's get back to him."

For once she was glad for her clay body. She could cry without any outward signs.


	7. The Outsider

Chapter 7: The Outsider

Sesshomaru had only been partially right after all. Youkai Inuyasha felt no pain. Kagome had felt nothing during those three sits she gave him, and didn't feel any pain from him now. But he did have emotions.

She could feel the emotion pouring off of him through the beads, but was doing her best to block it out. From what little she had been able to get from Sesshomaru's words, along with conversations with Myoga and Shippo, it was clear that youkai Inuyasha's mind would be considered alien and bizarre even by the standards of supernatural beings expected to live centuries. His overwhelming need to kill over all other concerns was something that went beyond mere predation, beyond even cruelty. It was a need as pressing as breathing.

Being so close to that kind of thinking was...disturbing.

As Kirara landed Kagome helped Miroku take Inuyasha off of her. It was difficult as he had bitten through the gag over his mouth and kept trying to bite the monk.

"It's alright Inuyasha." She repeated like a mantra. "It's all going to be okay. We're going to get the Tessaiga and you'll be your old self again." She looked up as Kaede hurried them in.

"Lay him down." the old miko ordered. Once Inuyasha was on the floor she gave Kagome the Tessaiga. "Now, how does this work?"

Kagome took the rusty-looking blade and touched it to the figure writhing on the floor.

Nothing.

"Come on Inuyasha." She pleaded as panic started to fill her mind, almost drowning out his alien thoughts.

She moved closer and tried to place the grip in his hand.

Nothing. No change at all.

"Please Inuyasha! Don't do this!"

"Kagome..." Miroku put his hand on her shoulder. "I'm sorry."

It had happened too many times. His youkai blood wouldn't let him go.

As Kagome ran outside Miroku followed her, leaving Kaede with the snarling beast that used to be Inuyasha.

...

As the three of them approached the village Kikyo noticed one home was shining brightly. There was a lit fire within and candles in every window, along with paper streamers hung up in bright colors. Inside came the sounds of talking, laughing, and music.

It was a celebration. A wedding. In her time, besides being the resting place of the jewel, this village was known for it's wedding parties going late into the night. She sighed, trying to ignore the sights and sounds.

"I wonder who it is?" Sango grinned before looking to Kikyo. "Something wrong?"

"Nothing." Kikyo quickly responded as her smile faded. "It's just, whenever I went to bless a wedding or a birth or a harvest or anything else, the party always stopped. Everyone bowed in reverence to me, and wouldn't get up until I had left."

"They never let you stay?" Shippo asked, briefly forgetting he hated her. "Even Inuyasha gets to be at celebrations. Well, actually Kagome drags him to them."

"I had my duties." Kikyo sighed. "It wouldn't have been proper for me to be acting like a...a..."

"A normal person?" Sango guessed.

"I am a miko, chosen of the Kami and guardian of the Shikon Jewel. My duties are more important than frivolous celebrations." Kikyo said in a tone that implied she wasn't exactly trying to convince them. "Come, we're almost at my sister's home."

...

Kagome wasn't sure how much time had passed sitting on the steps before Kaede's home. It could have been hours or minutes. It didn't matter. Miroku sat with her, neither saying anything for a long time.

Was this really the end? Was Inuyasha truly gone and all that was left was a bloodthirsty beast incapable of communication?

"Maybe...maybe we can find an island nobody lives on." Miroku finally said out loud. "Just take him there and let him go?"

Kagome considered the idea. "...No. No I want to see him. Even if he has to stay like that forever." Her heart sunk as she said that word.

Forever. Inuyasha would be like this forever.

He would never know how sorry she was for what she had said. Never be able to understand her words of apology, or care if he did.

He would never find happiness with Kikyo, or defeat Naraku.

She would never get the chance to tell him she loved him.

A scream from within the house had them both on their feet. It hadn't sounded like Inuyasha's roars.

Inside Kaede was clutching her wrist as she knelt on the floor near Inuyasha. Besides her was a bucket of water and a cloth.

"Lady Kaede!" Miroku helped her up and away from Inuyasha. "Are you hurt?"

"I meant to clean some of the blood off of him, make him a little more comfortable." She winced as Kagome pulled up her sleeve. His fangs had broken the skin.

"We need to take care of this." Kagome quickly went into nurse mode as she got out her first aid kit from her backpack.

"It's alright, he didn't get very deep." Kaede tried to calm Kagome as the young girl cleaned and bandaged her arm. "It's my own fault, I should have been paying closer attention to him."

Kagome said nothing, putting her entire focus on treating Kaede. It was a welcome respite. "I'm sorry." She said. "I should have been the one to watch him." She was about to say more when Sango, Shippo, and Kikyo entered the building. On the faces of her two companions she saw first confusion as to why Inuyasha hadn't yet been restored to his normal self, followed by horror as the reason dawned on the both of them at the same time.

"Inuyasha!" Shippo pleaded as he ran towards the prone figure. Luckily Sango quickly snatched him up. "No no no! Let me go! He's gotta come back! He's gotta!"

The poor little kitsune broke down in sobs. "Noooo!"

"I'm sorry." Kagome lowered her head, as if it were all her fault. "He's gone."

...

It had taken a long time to calm Shippo down. Kagome finally had him asleep in her lap, his face still streaked with tears. Sometimes she forgot how young he really was. She should have kept a closer eye on his mental state these last two weeks. The poor child had lost his father twice now.

Meanwhile Kikyo sat with her sister, watching as Inuyasha still struggled in his bonds. They had attempted to offer him food, but he had shown no interest in eating even after starving for two weeks.

"Kaede." Kikyo looked to her sister, staring as if only just now seeing her aged face. "Did Inuyasha miss me? Even when he thought I had betrayed him?"

The old miko nodded. "He did. He still does. You were the first person in his life besides his mother to treat him like a person rather than a monster."

Kikyo kept looking at him. "Do you think we would have been happy together if it weren't for Naraku?"

Her sister paused. "He would have chosen to be human for you, yes."

"That's not what I asked." Kikyo said. "It's alright, you can be honest with me."

Kaede signed. "Inuyasha has had very few people who have accepted him in his life. Though he tries to hide it, he wants to be accepted. If that was what it took for you too accept him..."

The undead miko cut her off. "What about Kagome? Is she going to use the jewel to make him human?"

Kaede looked away. "She has never mentioned it."

A howl-like cry rent the air. They both looked up to see Inuyasha fighting his bonds, snarling and growling.

Kikyo slowly reached over and hugged her surprised sister. She stroked the old woman's cheek softly. "Kaede, I'm sorry I wasn't there for you. But I want you to know that you've made your big sister proud."

Kaede blinked her single eye, then returned the hug before Kikyo withdrew. "Can you watch the kitsune and Inuyasha for a while? I need to discuss something with Kagome."

The old miko nodded, taking the sleeping Shippo from Kagome before the girl stood up. Kikyo motioned her outside.

"Your friend has told me about Inuyasha's sword, how it was broken and released his youkai side. She has also told me of the slaughtered villages, and of Inuyasha's pain and suffering from battles with Naraku's spawn. All because of the power I willingly gave Naraku." Kikyo said once they were outside. "I'm sorry for it. I never intended for all of this to happen."

Kagome slowly approached her. It would have been easy to berate Kikyo for her choices. But she had made her own mistakes. "On the night Inuyasha was kidnapped we had an argument. I told him no one wanted him around, and that no one would miss him if he never came back. If I hadn't, maybe this whole thing would never have happened."

"Kagome," she began, finally calling her by name. "Will you pray at the shrine with me? Bring the Tessaiga."

...

Miroku and Sango sat outside Kaede's house with Kirara between them. Normally he'd have already tried to make a move and been slapped down. But not this night.

"I know it's selfish, but I'm worried about us. When I think of how much we rely on him..."

Miroku nodded. "I know what you mean. We would all be dead dozens of times over if not for him and his strength."

Another roar came from within the building. Sango shook her head.

"Inuyasha wouldn't want to live like this. No point in putting it off any longer." She stood up, followed by Miroku. "You don't have to come."

"I want too." He told her. "I won't let you take all of the guilt on your shoulders. We'll do this together." He held her hand as they entered the building, Kirara following behind. "Get some sleep Kaede. We'll watch him for now."

The old woman nodded, taking Shippo with her. Once they were out of hearing range Sango knelt before Inuyasha.

"It's alright. I'm here to help you." She said as she looked upon the raging beast that had once been her friend, hoping and praying to see a trace of Inuyasha within it. Some sign that she was wrong. But there was nothing. No look of recognition in his red eyes. No hint of a personality. Just bloodlust.

Inuyasha roared and struggled against his bonds, desperate to reach the woman in front of him and tear her to pieces. Sango turned from him as she removed the glass vial from it's box, pulled out the stopper, and poured a single drop out onto the tip of a small knife she carried. She watched as the green liquid streaked down the face of the blade like a tear, before plugging the vial back up and putting it back in it's box.

"I just have to get close enough to cut you, then it will all be over." She wiped her eyes with her left hand as she clutched the knife behind her back in her right. "No more madness. No more pain." Miroku stood next to her as they waited for Inuyasha to get calm enough to strike without getting bit.

"I'm sorry Inuyasha." Sango felt the tears spill down her cheeks. "Please forgive me."

...

The shrine smelled of incense and age. Kikyo knelt before the statues and relics of the Kami, Kagome at her side.

"Did you know I was trained to be a miko since I was a little girl?" Kikyo began. "My parents gave me to the previous miko of this shrine to raise when I was four, once my abilities began to manifest, and after that I barely saw them. They said it was a great honor for our family."

"But no one asked how you felt about it?" Kagome guessed.

"No, they didn't." Kikyo admitted. "She was a harsh teacher who enforced her lessons with a switch. When other girls were learning at their mother's feet and playing, I was hoping I could improve my archery enough to meet her standards so I could get fewer beatings. I cried myself to sleep most nights, begging the Kami to have my parents come and take me home."

Hesitantly, slowly, Kagome reached her arm around Kikyo's shoulders. The undead miko made no move to stop her.

"She died in a youkai attack, along with my parents. Suddenly I was the sole miko guardian of the village, keeper of the jewel of four souls, and responsible for a baby sister I never even knew existed until then. I was ten."

Kagome looked at the floor. "My father died soon after my younger brother was born. It was a car accident." She mentally kicked herself. Kikyo would of course have no idea what that was. "It was an accident. But I still had my mother and grandparents...I can't imagine how scared and alone you must have felt. And with all of your responsibilities and having to raise a child on top of that..."

Kikyo turned to look at her. "Even then I was an outsider. I had no real friends. No family beyond my sister, who depended on me. As I grew up no man would dare show interest in me for fear of being cursed."

"Until Inuyasha."

Kikyo nodded. "We were both outsiders in our own way. He was the first man who ever treated me as if I were just...normal."

Kagome wasn't sure what to say to that, before she recalled something she'd read in a magazine. "In my time we have people called celebrities. They are people who are very famous for things they do, like acting or music or writing. Some of them are happy with that, but some become miserable and wish they could just be normal again. That they could step outside without anyone recognizing them. I've heard it's especially hard on people who became celebrities as children." She looked into Kikyo's eyes for a moment. "Just like you, most child celebrities were never given a choice."

Kikyo's let out a breath. "Yes. The truth is I never wanted any of this. These powers, these responsibilities, this life. All I ever wanted was to be a normal woman. That's why I wanted to use the jewel to make Inuyasha human. It wasn't that I didn't love him as a hanyou. I wanted it out of my life, to be free. I wanted to be able to walk with him with no one looking at us."

"You can have all of that." Kagome tried to tell her. "Once I use the jewel to restore your life..."

Kikyo sadly shook her head. "No. That isn't fair to him. Or to you."

Kagome was sure she'd heard her wrong.

"Tonight I saw you take his pain without hesitation. I saw you give him up for his safety with no thought to your own wants. You've reminded me of things my dead heart had forgotten. I've asked myself if I would do the same for him, and am saddened to find the answer within me is no. I like to think I would have when I was alive."

She bowed to the shrine. "For months now I've denied it, but I can't any longer. The world has moved on without me. I know now I am forever an outsider, a stranger among the living and in this time. An echo of a dead woman pretending it still has a place in this world. I have done so much evil since returning, any good I did while alive has been canceled out. I know what likely awaits me, and can only beg for forgiveness with the full knowledge I deserve none."

She raised her head and looked to Kagome. Her expression was calm, peaceful. As if a great weight had been lifted from her.

"Thank you for listening to me. But there is something I must do. Please, give me the Tessaiga."

Kagome handed her the sword. Instantly Kikyo's hands began to smoke.

"Your hands!" Kagome tried to grab it back, but found herself blocked by a barrier. "What are you doing?"

"Trying to fix a mistake." Kikyo shouted as she concentrated on the blade. Her hands smouldered before beginning to turn back to clay.

"Kikyo wait!" Kagome pounded on the barrier as the smoke and flames began to travel up Kikyo's arms. Her clay body began to crack open, blue light escaping from within.

"Kikyo! Kikyo!"

Now her whole body seemed to be almost nothing but smoke and light. The Tessaiga began to glow with the same blue light.

With a strangled cry Kikyo fell backwards. Her barrier broke, allowing Kagome to rush over and hold her. Her flesh was hard as baked clay, and each word she spoke caused more and more cracks to form on her now brittle body.

"I have reforged the spell on his sword. His youkai blood is now sealed away, just as it was before the sword was broken." Kikyo explained as her feet crumbled to dust. "Even if it's broken again, the seal will remain."

Kagome had tears running down her cheeks as the crumbling reached Kikyo's waist. "Thank you."

Kikyo smiled slightly. "Go to him. I release you from your promise. Please, take good care of Inuyasha. Tell him I'm sorry for everything."

"I will." Kagome promised. "I'll tell him you never stopped loving him."

Kikyo closed her eyes as the rest of her turned to dust in Kagome's hands, leaving her alone in the shrine. She wiped her eyes, then quickly stood and grabbed the Tessaiga. She would grieve later. Now she just needed to know Inuyasha was okay.

....

Kagome ran all of the way back to Kaede's home and was out of breath when she arrived. Sango had been heading to the shrine to get her and almost ran into her.

"Sango!"

"Is everything okay?" The slayer asked, stopping the other girl.

"I have to see Inuyasha! Is he alright?"

"That's what I wanted to tell you." Sango stammered with an immense look of relief on her face. "He...he's back to normal."

As Kagome ran past her, Sango pulled out her knife, still unused. "Sorry Inuyasha, you were wrong. Turns out I'm just as likely to do something stupid to try to get you back as the others after all. Even if that was trusting in Kikyo."


	8. Safe

Chapter 8: Safe

The first thing Kagome felt as she approached Kaede's home was fear. Not her own, Inuyasha's. Along with the constant dull pain mixed in with the occasional sharp sting when he shifted onto one of his cuts. She hesitated at the door. Before his transformation Inuyasha had recognized her, even said her name. That was a good sign, right? And maybe the transformation had burned through all of that red flower juice in him?

She took a deep breath, then slid the door open.

"Inuyasha?"

Kaede and Miroku were trying to reach out to Inuyasha, to help him up at the very least. It hurt her more than she had thought it would when he cringed and pulled away from their touch, backing away until he was in the corner, and trembling like a terrified child. His eyes darted around wildly, scanning the room for danger. Though she knew he was taller than her, he seemed much smaller all huddled up like that.

"Get back! Give him some space!" Kagome ordered the two of them, her voice harsher than she had meant it to be thanks to the beads still influencing her.

She knelt before Inuyasha in the same way she might have upon finding an abandoned puppy. "Please don't be afraid Inuyasha. I'm not going to hurt you." she said while reaching for him. She moved slowly, stopping when she felt his fear spike and starting back up when he seemed calmer. After almost ten minutes she had her hand on his head and was lightly stroking his right ear. Inuyasha sighed and closed his eyes.

"Inuyasha, do you remember what happened?"

He looked up in her direction, but wouldn't look directly at her. She felt fear and shame and self-loathing coming from him. Along with...relief at her presence?

He wanted her with him. He didn't hate her. Even after what she had done to him, he still didn't hate her.

Kagome shook her head. She had to concentrate. She was no therapist or expert on trauma. But she knew one thing thanks to their new connection.

He hurt.

His body ached from hanging in his chains, and the whip had cut him all down his back. Hunger gnawed at his gut. To make matters worse his youkai form felt nothing and always took things too far physically, leaving Inuyasha to feel the pain afterwards. His healing would normally already have taken care of it, but she guessed that without food his body didn't have the energy to spare for fast healing.

Besides his injuries he was still naked and filthy, his body covered with blood and dirt and other things that Kagome didn't want to think about. Worst of all though were his eyes. Instead of the usual life and energy they shined with his eyes were glazed over and lifeless, with dark circles under them. Had his captors not even allowed him to sleep?

'Oh Inuyasha, what did they do to you?'

She needed to get him clean. To take him someplace he could feel safe.

Kagome thought a moment, then decided. She would take him back to her time. Her family would understand, he liked them, and there were almost no marauding youkai to worry about.

"Inuyasha, can you walk?"

The boy slowly stood, bracing himself against her. He looked away, ashamed, and attempted to limp his way out the door.

"Inuyasha, wait up." She went over to him, letting him lean on her. "It's okay Inuyasha, you'd do the same for me." she told him. "You've always been there for us. Please, just this once, let me be there for you."

Inuyasha said nothing as Kagome called for Kirara. The fire cat came bounding over in her larger form, nearly knocking over the two of them.

"Easy girl! Take it easy!" Kagome scolded lightly as Kirara mewled and nuzzled Inuyasha. He hesitated, then slowly reached out and petted her muzzle. Kagome smiled a little at that.

"Wait here for a moment." she held his hand. "I promise I'll be right back."

...

Kaede nodded her head sadly at Kagome's story. "I see. I suspected as much when she hugged me. It was like she was saying goodbye." She would grieve her sister later, right now the affairs of the living were more pressing. "Yes, taking him to your time seems to be the best option."

"Kagome...I have to tell you something before you go." Miroku gave her a very serious look. Kagome had a feeling she wasn't going to like this.

"Tomorrow morning I'll be setting out on my journey again. And Sango has agreed to come with me."

Kagome was just about to demand an explanation and accuse them of abandoning Inuyasha before the obvious reason hit her. "Your curse?"

"Yes." He nodded sadly. "I hope you can catch up with us later, but I cannot stay here any longer. I don't know how much time I have left. I'm sorry."

She walked over to him, putting his hand in hers, giving him a warm smile. "Don't be. You've done more than enough. Take care of yourself."

Kagome finished packing a few things from Kaede and prepared to leave. "Take care of Shippo." she told the old miko before hugging her. "We'll come visit soon."

Kaede hugged her back. "Don't be gone too long."

...

Outside Inuyasha leaned against Kirara, struggling to hold himself together. His first thoughts upon waking up tied down had been sheer panic about being out of the dark room. Master would be very angry with him. Master would punish him for being a bad dog. Maybe if he went back to the dark room before Master noticed he was gone he'd only get his normal beatings and not extra?

And then it had all come flooding back to him, unfiltered by the red flower juice. He wished he had some right now. He would give just about anything to be a simple beast again, to not remember. But he didn't have any, and he remembered everything.

He remembered Kagome rejecting him. He remembered being captured. He remembered pain and misery and darkness all around him.

He remembered humiliation and shame as Master proved him to be just another animal, neither human or youkai but something less than either. He remembered asking himself the same questions over and over again, until thinking had become too difficult. 'Why am I so weak? How can I protect Kagome when I can't even protect myself?'

And then his memory was nothing but screams and feelings of intense pleasure and the sensation of flesh shredding and bones shattering under his claws.

Inuyasha slumped to the wooden deck, leaning back against Kirara.

It had happened again. He had transformed and killed someone. The evidence was all over him.

He was weak, and he was a monster.

"Inuyasha?"

He looked up as Sango approached him. He huddled against Kirara, expecting the slayer to reject him like he deserved.

"Inuyasha." she knelt down. "Don't be afraid. We're your friends." she frowned as he pulled away from her, cringing as if expecting a blow.

"Inuyasha," Sango sighed. "Miroku and I are heading out on our own for now. But once you get better, you and Kagome can catch up to us." She stood up. "And you are going to get better. I know you will. Whatever they did to you, it doesn't change who you are. You're still Inuyasha. Still the same brave, loyal friend I'm proud to know."

She turned as Kagome came out of Kaede's home. Both girls hugged, promising to meet up again soon. Together they helped Inuyasha onto Kirara, and with a last wave from Kagome to Sango headed for the well.

...

The smell of blood and death and the dungeon coming off of him filled the confined space of the well. Kagome resisted the urge to vomit. If it was this bad for her, what must it smell like for him?

"Can you make it up Inuyasha?"

He nodded, slowly climbing the ladder. Usually he would have leapt up without any problem. She could feel he was struggling, trying to hold himself together because he thought she'd think him weak if he showed how hurt and upset he was. Once he was up she climbed after him. He wobbled on his feet, unsteady, and she took his hand to support him.

"Just a little further and we can get you a nice hot shower." She told him, trying to be positive without being condescending.

Once in the house she turned on the lights. According to the wall clock it was a little after 4 am. The Christmas decorations were still up.

"Momma, could you come here please?" She shouted.

In a few moments her mother appeared at the top of the stairs. "Kagome? What are you...?"

One look at the boy had silenced any questions her mother had as her father and son tried to look past her. "Dad, put on some coffee. Sota, get some towels ready." Both men nodded and headed to perform their task.

Mrs. Higurashi ran down the stairs towards the two of them. Kagome felt Inuyasha get nervous and gently placed her hand on his back.

"It's okay Inuyasha. You know my mom." She soothed him. "She's going to help you."

Together they took him into their bathroom. Her mother turned on the shower while Kagome raided her family's medicine cabinet, setting out anything that might even remotely be useful. Once the water was warm enough Kagome guided Inuyasha into the shower with her, not bothering to undress. She would have to change out of her bloody clothes later anyway. It was more important to keep near him, to reassure him she was really there and wouldn't leave him.

Inuyasha sighed as the warm water washed over his body, grime and dried blood running off of him and swirling in the drain. He began to run his claws over his arms, just hard enough not to break the skin. Kagome hoped that it would make him feel more like his old self again. Though hygiene standards in the feudal era weren't quite up to modern standards, Inuyasha typically liked to bathe whenever he could. He said it was an old habit from when he was younger, to keep the scent of blood off of him so as not to attract predators.

Explaining what they were doing at each step, being as gentle as they could, Kagome and her mother had bathed him. She felt no embarrassment coming from him, and concluded he was just beyond caring anymore. Unfortunately the matted mess that was his hair couldn't be saved and they had been forced to cut it short. Afterwards Kagome had him sit as she shampooed and rinsed his hair, then carefully felt all around his scalp, searching for more cuts or tender areas.

As her mother dried Inuyasha with a towel Kagome stripped off her bloody, soaked clothes in the shower and put on a bathrobe. She could deal with them later.

Now that he had been cleaned up she could see just how thin he was. And he was even more injured than she had thought. The whip had cut him from his shoulders to his thighs, some of them quite deep and looking red and inflamed. He also had a swollen left eye, and she recalled it had felt like he had been kicked in it before.

Her mother reached for the first aid kit and together they got to work. They cleaned out his cuts, paying special attention to the inflamed ones, coated them in an antiseptic, and covered them with bandages. Every time Kagome touched one of his cuts she felt a stinging pain from him, but tried to ignore it. She then reached into her backpack and pulled out something from Kaede. A set of clothes similar to the white ones Inuyasha usually wore under his firerat clothes. They were soft and clean and wouldn't irritate his wounds.

"Mom, can you take him to my room and get him dressed while I change?"

Her mother nodded, leading Inuyasha by the hand out of the bathroom. Kagome quickly turned the shower back on and got cleaned up, then dried herself off. She opened the clothes dryer, thankful that her mother had set her laundry for last that night. She dressed herself in a fresh pair of panties and a large t-shirt that went down to her thighs. It had come from her school, when they had been trying to raise money for charity by selling overpriced t-shirts and each student had been 'encouraged' to purchase one. Hers had come a few sizes to big. She still liked to sleep in it though.

Kagome looked at herself in the mirror. Her eyes were sunken in, and she looked like she'd just been through a war. Inuyasha's pain was just background noise to her by now, and she hoped that blocking out youkai Inuyasha's disturbing personality had given her enough practice to keep her own personality separate from Inuyasha's. At least to the point that she could remember not to swear in front of her mother! She grabbed some over the counter painkillers and filled a glass of water. She wasn't sure if they'd do any good for him, but it was worth a try.

When she got to her room her mother was feeding Inuyasha some leftover soup she'd heated up to get a few calories in him. She smiled and sat on the bed with him. "Here Inuyasha, take these pills. They'll make it hurt less." She told him, hoping at least the placebo effect would work if the pills didn't.

The boy looked at her, then with a trembling hand took the pills and swallowed them. Afterwards she helped her mother feed him until the soup was gone. When she attempted to leave him too sleep a clawed hand grabbed her wrist. Inuyasha gave her a pleading look and she felt his fear and desperation through the beads.

"Alright Inuyasha, I'll stay with you."

Throughout that night Inuyasha had made no sounds. But once Kagome sat and pulled his head to rest on her lap it was as if a switch had been pulled. He started to whimper softly. Then his breath came in short gasps. Kagome recognized what was happening and pulled him to her as Inuyasha began to sob quietly.

"Let me know if you need anything." Her mother said. "We can talk later."

"It's alright Inuyasha. It's all going to be okay." She said in her most soothing voice as he buried his face in her stomach and clutched at the fabric of her t-shirt, holding on like he thought she might disappear. She stroked his hair and ears as he trembled, willing to give him all the time in the world. Soon he was sobbing as hard as his tired body could, all of the emotions of the last two weeks pouring out of him as he released one broken wail after another.

It took every ounce of her strength to not break down herself. He had always been the strong one, all of his life he had to be strong to survive in a world that wanted him dead, and now that he needed her to be strong she wasn't about to let him down again.

"You're safe now."


	9. Get Through It

Thanks to Ember Reverie of fanfiction.net for suggesting a name for Kagome's mom.

Chapter 9: Get Through It

Kagome held Inuyasha until he finally fell asleep. Then she carefully removed herself from his arms and pulled up his shirt to check his bandages.

Those first aid courses her mother had taken as a teenager and then taught to her had come in handy in the feudal era. Whether it was cleaning Shippo's bruises and cuts from playing too rough, fixing Miroku and Sango's injuries, or just sitting up with Inuyasha as his body quickly healed from wounds that would certainly have killed a human. Inuyasha had always been embarrassed about needing help, and truthfully he usually didn't _really_ need any medical attention beyond rest, but it made her feel useful.

Kagome had read a few books on advanced first aid after Inuyasha had been impaled for the first time, wanting to be ready to do what she could if (or as it had turned out, when) it happened again. She had also given Kaede some tips on hygiene and sanitation even as the old woman taught her about herbal medicine. The death rate in the village had gone down quite a bit. Sometimes Kagome wondered if she was messing up the present by all she was doing in the past, but so far she hadn't noticed any changes in her time. And besides, was she just supposed to ignore it when someone needed help?

A few months ago while their group had been staying at the village a frantic man had come for Kaede and said that his son had fallen from a tree. Kagome had followed the old miko to find a crowd of people gathered around the man's son. Her heart had sunk as she saw who it was. Toshi, a six-year old who she had often seen playing with Shippo and watching Inuyasha practice with his Tessaiga. The boy lay on the ground, clutching his leg and screaming in pain.

Kaede had Toshi's father carry the boy back to her home, while Inuyasha caught up with her as she trailed behind.

"He's going to die." Inuyasha had said bluntly.

When she angrily retorted that he didn't know that Inuyasha shook his head. "Come on, you saw the bone sticking out of his leg. The infection will kill him. Kaede can give him some opium to ease his pain a little, but that's all." His voice was very serious, and he made no comments about 'weak humans' to try to deflect. "Too bad, he was a good kid."

She had refused to accept that and run ahead. She had told Kaede to start boiling water, and gotten out her first aid kit. Together they had set Toshi's broken leg as Inuyasha held the boy down, his father being unable to do so while hearing his son's screams. Even with the opium tonic Kaede had him drink it was still very painful. Then she had shown Kaede how to disinfect the wound, and stitched it closed. She even went home and got a few antibiotics from her family's medicine cabinet, left over from a gallbladder operation her grandfather had. She knew that it was risky and might not pay off, but better than nothing.

To the surprise of the village Toshi survived. After a week no infection developed and his leg slowly began to heal. He would probably limp for the rest of his life, but he was alive. Kagome could still picture Toshi's mother crying in happiness and hugging her, thanking her over and over again for saving her son. But even more important to her was what Inuyasha had said afterwards as their group headed out to resume their search for the jewel shards and Naraku.

"Hey Kagome, you did good." He had said with a grin.

After checking Inuyasha's wounds she pulled his shirt back down and tucked him in. She would feel it through the beads when he woke up.

"I'll be back soon." she whispered softly before leaning over and kissing him on the top of his head between his ears.

"I love you."

...

Kimiko sat at the kitchen table with her father. She nodded in appreciation as he handed her a cup of coffee.

"You'd think I'd be used to this sort of thing by now." She said out loud before taking a drink.

"Magic and monsters is one thing. Showing up with Inuyasha naked and covered in blood is another." Her father replied. "She said he gets hurt a lot, but I get the feeling this time is going to be different."

Since it was almost morning anyway Kimiko decided to start breakfast. As she got everything out she heard someone coming down the stairs, Kagome judging by how she was trying to be quiet.

"How is he?" She asked once her daughter came into the kitchen.

Kagome pulled out a chair, sitting down with a slouch. "He's been badly abused, but he should recover. He's been through a lot worse." She paused and let out a breath. "His mental state though...I really can't say."

"Kagome," Her grandfather began "we've been patient with you. But now I want you to tell us everything. I know you haven't been giving us the whole story about what goes on back there."

Kagome bit her lip before nodding softly. "I'm sorry. I just didn't want you to worry."

And so Kagome told them everything that had happened that night, and everything that she had left out in her stories about the feudal era before. She told them about Kikyo, Inuyasha's youkai transformation, and Naraku, and left out none of the gory details. She explained the purpose of the beads, how she had misused them, and how they now bound her to Inuyasha. By the time she was finished she was staring down at the table, unable to meet their gaze. A part of her was worried they would forbid her to go back, forcing her to choose between her family and Inuyasha.

"And are you sure these youkai transformations are not going to happen again?" Kimiko asked. She may have been a kind person, but the safety of her family had to come first.

"Momma, Inuyasha felt terrible after the last one." Kagome pleaded. "He's going to be devastated when he finds out he killed almost twenty men this time. But I trust what Kikyo said, they won't happen again."

She picked at her breakfast for a moment, not having much of an appetite. "Can he stay here? Just for a while I mean. I think it will help him."

Kimiko looked to her father, then nodded. "Of course. But while he's here you will be going to school. I have some vacation days I can use to watch over him."

Kagome ran up and hugged her. "Thank you." She yawned loudly. "Sorry, I've been awake since yesterday morning."

Kimiko smiled and stroked her hair. "Go get some sleep. Good thing you and Sota have the day off today." She was already making a mental list of things to do if Inuyasha was going to be staying with them. First off she would have to get some clothes in his size; then set up the spare bedroom. Besides that he really wouldn't need much beyond emotional support.

...

Kagome quietly crept into her room and was somehow relieved to find Inuyasha still asleep, even though she would have sensed it were he to wake up. She lay down in her bed next to him, wrapping her arms around him protectively. She tried to take in every detail, committing them to memory in case this was the last time she would ever be this close to him.

Though she would never have compared it to what Inuyasha had gone through; these past two weeks had been hard on her. She missed him so much. Nothing had been able to distract her. Not school, not her friends, not even her family.

Which was why she knew what might happen soon would be the most painful thing she could ever experience in her life.

Her scent might comfort him now, but once he remembered everything she'd put him through there was every chance he would hate her. She knew she would also have to tell him about Kikyo. He might never forgive her for that either. She couldn't ask that of him.

She knew that Inuyasha would let her stay out of obligation and loyalty to their friends, but he wouldn't be happy around her. He wouldn't talk to or even look at her unless absolutely necessary. Once Naraku was dead he'd leave her and try to get on with his life. And she had no right to protest any of this if he chose to do so.

She could have trusted him. Instead she used the beads to control him.

She could have told him her feelings. Instead she sat him when he got too close, and then sat him again for not reading her mind.

She could have said something that night. Instead in her anger and pride she had thrown him away like trash. Like nothing they had been through mattered to her.

But with her new ability to sense his emotions, she had some hope. She could help him. Maybe even, one day, make it up to him. She had too try. A second chance was more than she deserved, and she wasn't about to waste it.

...

Inuyasha slowly became aware that he was somewhere warm, and surrounded by Kagome's scent. After a moment he decided it must be her bed. Though he would never have admitted it, Kagome's bed was Inuyasha's favorite place in her time.

He opened his eyes, blinking a few times. It was dark, and that brought out fears in him that he struggled to push down. He was NOT afraid of the dark damn it! No matter what had happened to him!

Unfortunately a rather pressing need meant he had to get up. He drew the blankets back, finding himself wearing some white clothes. He blushed as the memory came rushing back of Kagome's mother dressing him. He placed his feet on the floor and slowly stood up. So far so good. After getting confident enough that he wasn't going to fall flat on his face he quickly went to the door and opened it.

His sharp ears immediately heard the sounds of people talking from downstairs, but he ignored that for now as he walked to the bathroom. On his first visit to Kagome's home her mother had hastily explained the basic concept to him while dragging him into the house after she had caught him about to relieve himself in the front yard. He didn't quiet understand why she made a big deal out of going there instead of against any convenient tree, but she was nice enough to him that he obeyed her strange rules.

After he was done and had washed his hands (another rule he wasn't sure of the reason behind) he headed out. He planned to go back to Kagome's bed and just try to sort through everything that had happened when a voice called to him from downstairs.

"Is that you Inuyasha?"

It was Kagome's mother. Inuyasha considered pretending he hadn't heard her, before he sighed.

"Yeah."

The woman appeared at the bottom of the stairs. "Can you come sit with me for a moment?"

Inuyasha slowly made his way down the stairs. What was he so nervous about? She probably just wanted to make sure he was okay. He would tell her he was fine and that would be that.

Kimiko motioned him over to the couch, grabbing the remote and turning the TV off. She sat and directed him to sit next to her. "Let me check your bandages."

He nodded and turned his back to her. As she pulled up the back of his shirt he stiffened, then relaxed as a warm hand stroked his back.

"It's alright; don't be afraid."

Inuyasha blustered at that. Afraid? Him? Never! If it had been anyone else he would probably have said a few choice words, but he usually tried to watch his mouth in front of her.

He felt her peel back the bandages, then place them back. "You're healing very fast. I guess all you really needed was some food in you. Speaking of which I saved some chicken and rice from dinner for you."

Inuyasha looked over his shoulder at her. Dinner?

"How...how long was I asleep?" He finally asked her.

"All day." She told him. Her voice was soft and kind. It reminded him so much of his own mother. "Everyone else has already gone to bed. Kagome is sleeping in the guest bedroom, she didn't want to wake you."

She stood and took his hand. Normally he would have protested the close contact, but it felt comforting. Like when Momma would hold his hand as they walked together when he was little.

He shook his head to clear away those thoughts. She was not his mother. His mother was dead. Sentimentality was a weakness he couldn't afford. Let the others pine over lost loved ones. He was just fine!

"I could eat." He said before adding a quick "Ma'am."

Kimiko smiled and led him to the kitchen. She sat him down in a chair and took out something from the big white thing that made stuff cold (whatever Kagome had called it) and put it in the little black thing that made stuff hot (the phone? No wait, that wasn't it). Soon enough he had a pile of rice and chicken in front of him that he eagerly attacked.

Kimiko watched as he devoured nearly the whole thing, and once he was finished she showed him how to put his dishes in the dishwasher (whose name he could remember because it was so simple).

"Uh...thank you..." He said hesitantly. "I uh...I guess I'll go back to the well now." He was surprised when she grabbed his arm.

"Are you sure? After what you've gone through no one would blame you if you wanted to take it easy for a while."

"I don't need to take it easy!" He shouted louder than he had meant too. At her look he instantly regretted it. She was giving him her 'Mommy means business' look that she used on her kids to get them to obey.

Inuyasha hung his head. "...sorry."

Her expression softened. "How about just for another day? Kagome has a lot to tell you. She's been very worried about you."  
Kagome. She was worried about him?

Inuyasha looked from the woman to the door. He imagined going out there alone...back to his time. Trying to fight the icy feeling of dread as it filled him.

What if she was right to worry? What if he really was as weak as Sesshomaru had always said? After all, he had been captured by those humans. And then they had beaten him and locked him in the dark and...

Inuyasha suddenly swayed on his feet. Kimiko caught him and helped him back to the couch. She sat and placed him on it next to her. He gave a token resistance as she held him; her hand rubbing small circles on his back.

"I-I'm fine..." His voice cracked even as the tears fell down his cheeks. Why was he so weak?

But the older woman didn't scold him or make fun of him. She just held him, and before he knew it the words were pouring out of him. He told her about everything. His mother who had died when he was little. His father who he had never known. His asshole half-brother who had never accepted him and was enraged by his very existence.

He told her how he had lived his life fighting and hiding, how Kikyo had offered him a chance at happiness, and how it had been cruelly snatched away by Naraku. He told her of his despair, how once Kagome came to her senses and realized how weak he was she would throw him away like the trash he was. Eventually he could no longer form words and just cried into her shoulder.

Kimiko's heart ached for him. Beyond that she was angry. Angry at the people who had rejected an orphaned child. Angry at this Sesshomaru who would blame him for his own birth. Angry at these slavers who had wounded his self-confidence.

"Inuyasha, look at me." She held his face so he was looking into her eyes. "I don't ever want to hear you blame yourself for any of this again. What those people did when you were little, what happened to Kikyo, how Sesshomaru treats you, what that man did to you, and what your youkai side made you do, none of it is your fault. None of it. You are not to blame for any of this and you did nothing to deserve it. Understand?"

Inuyasha sniffed, nodding as he wiped his eyes.

She helped him back to Kagome's bed, then tucked him in. As he fell back asleep she held his hand, letting him know he wasn't alone.


	10. One Week Later

Chapter 10: One Week Later

Sango reached up and grabbed her returning hiraikotsu with practiced ease as Miroku sucked the remains of the huge spider youkai into his wind tunnel. This was one youkai that wouldn't be preying on this village anymore! The monk quickly pulled the beads back in place once he was finished.

"Thank you thank you!" The village's headman bowed. "I can't thank you enough! Anything you want is yours!"

"How about a meal and room for the night?" Miroku asked before glancing over his shoulder at Sango as Kirara turned back to her small form and hopped on her shoulder. The slayer was covered in gore from the spider.

"And a bath."

...

After checking to make sure a certain perverted monk wasn't watching, Sango sighed as she eased into the warm water. After assuring the headman's wife she was okay she began using the soap the woman had left behind for her to wash off.

Sango didn't consider herself particularly squeamish. She had been around gore and death most of her life. Ending up covered in the blood of her kills was simply an occupational hazard. Not pleasant certainly, but still nothing to get too upset about. Usually a nice warm bath would have been just the thing to relax her after a hard fight.

But not tonight.

She looked up as Kirara hopped in with her, then swam over to sit on her lap.

"You're worried about Inuyasha too, huh girl?" She asked Kirara as the fire cat shook off the water.

Sango knew she shouldn't worry so much, but couldn't help herself. With her past she had every reason to worry about those she cared about. If that made her over protective, than she guessed she was over protective.

Besides that she had recognized something in Inuyasha's eyes when he had cringed and pulled away from her. How could she not know that look? It was the same lost, sad expression she saw in her little brother's eyes whenever he was out of Naraku's control.

"Sango?"

The slayer instantly turned towards the voice, hands flying up to cover her breasts.

"Get out of here!" She grabbed a bucket to throw at the monk before noticing something strange.

"What are you wearing?"

Miroku had a dark cloth wrapped around his eyes, and was feeling his way towards the bath.

"They only have the one bath." He said. "I was hoping you'd wish to share? Dinner will be ready soon and I don't want to miss it."

Miroku swore he could feel Sango's glare, and was just about to give up when he heard her exhale.

"Fine, but you stay on your side and keep your hands where I can see them."

The monk nodded as he felt the side of the bath, then began to undress. Sango blushed and turned around, and didn't look back until she heard him slide into the water.

"It's nice." He sighed. "Though I wish Inuyasha was here..."

Sango raised an eyebrow at that. "You...miss bathing with him?"

"What? No no no! Not in that way!" Miroku waved his hands. "But there are things a man can only speak of with another man." The monk explained as he dunked his head underwater.

Sango began to scrub her arms. "Oh really? Like what?"

"I wouldn't wish to scandalize you." He replied after popping back up. "Besides, I don't think Inuyasha would like me talking about it."

Sango thought on that for a moment. She rarely had a real talk with Inuyasha. Usually it was just basic pleasantries, shouts in battle, warnings about some danger, or him giving her his own version of a pep talk (which mostly consisted of "Stop moping, get off your ass, and fight!") She was starting to regret never taking the time to really get to know him.

"If you tell me something you talk with Inuyasha about, I'll tell you something Kagome and I talk about."

She could see on his face Miroku was turning the offer over in his mind.

"Alright, but no personal betrayals."

She thought for a moment about her first question. "Does Inuyasha really love Kagome?"

"He does." The monk nodded. "He wants to be with her, but thinks she could never want him. He thinks no woman could ever want a hanyou." He let that settle for a moment, then asked her his question.

"Does Kagome really love Inuyasha?"

"Yes." Sango replied as she sunk up to her neck in the bath. "She told me she thinks about him all the time. But she thinks he only loves Kikyo..." She trailed off. "I wonder if she's told him what happened to her?"

Miroku moved a bit closer to her, Sango offering no objections. "He will be saddened, but I don't believe he'll be angry with Kagome. It wasn't her fault."

...

And so as the minutes passed they both shared what they knew of their friends. Sango learned more of Inuyasha's past, and Miroku learned more of the future world Kagome came from.

"So they have a pill that a woman can take and she won't get pregnant?" He laughed and shook his head. "How does anyone get anything done then?"

"I know right?!" Sango laughed, barely noticing that they had moved closer together. The slayer blushed before asking another question. "Do you think they belong together?"

"I do." Miroku seemed to stare directly at her. "I think there is no one in the world he would rather be with." He looked to his side, a pointless gesture as he couldn't see anything. "Does...Kagome feel the same way about him? If she did it would make...Inuyasha very happy."

Sango swallowed the lump in her throat. "I...I think she does." She hesitated, then grabbed one of his hands. "I think she would love to be with him, no matter what happens." She reached up and pulled on the blindfold. "Do you think 'Inuyasha' would let 'Kagome' take off his blindfold?"

The monk held her hand to his chest. "He would." As the cloth left his eyes he moved close until he was sitting next to her. "And would she want him to kiss her now?"

Sango reached for his head and leaned in towards his face...

"Oh! I'm sorry!"

Both of them quickly turned and covered themselves as the headman's wife stood in the door. "I-I just wanted to tell you that dinner is ready." The older woman covered her eyes and blushed before quickly leaving the room.

Miroku and Sango sat in silence, before the slayer stood up and began to dry herself off. "We uh...we should hurry. Don't want to miss dinner."

"Right." Miroku sighed, silently cursing fate.

...

Kagome lay in her bed, trying to get some sleep but finding it impossible.

Things had been getting better. Inuyasha was talking again, and she was seeing hints of his old self. Momma had been wonderful, giving Inuyasha all of the affection and attention he had always secretly craved. He was rarely away from her mother's side. Kagome was happy to see that he was able to accept her care. Usually it was very hard to get him to admit he needed help, or for him to take it without complaint. He was slowly regaining the weight he had lost, and one day she even saw him smile as he ate some brownies her mother had baked for him.

But some things weren't going so well. At first she had thought it was just her imagination, but as the days went on she became more and more sure of it.

Inuyasha was avoiding her.

Whenever she came near she sensed him getting nervous. After that first night when he had sobbed into her arms, he had barely said a word to her in the entire week he'd lived at her home. He seemed alright with the rest of her family, even helping Momma in the kitchen, cleaning the shrine with her grandfather, or just watching TV with Sota. But as soon as she came around he suddenly felt the need to be someplace else.

'Not that you have any right to complain.' She scolded herself. 'You've done more to hurt him than anyone besides Naraku.'

She tried not to feel hurt by his rejection. If he didn't want to be around her it was completely understandable. Even so she couldn't help the pain that his rejection caused her. Or the guilt that taunted her night and day, telling her that if she had just apologized and asked him to come back that fateful night none of this would have happened. Even if logically she knew it wasn't entirely her fault.

The part of Inuyasha's personality in her mind from the beads told her she should just march over to the guest bedroom, wake him up, and ask what the problem was. Luckily the more rational part of her was still in control and knew that might only drive him further away from her.

Kagome turned onto her back. There had to be a way to make things right between them again. She wanted to tell him how sorry she was for everything. But more than that, she wanted him to feel safe when he was with her.

She sat up at that thought. Was that it? Inuyasha didn't feel safe with her anymore? Did he think she was going to hurt him? Did he not trust her?

She was suddenly jolted out of her thoughts by a nagging sense of wrongness. It took her only a few moments to realize the cause.

She couldn't sense Inuyasha.

Kagome ran to the guest bedroom, finding it empty. She forced down her panic and scanned the room, noticing that the window was open and the Tessaiga was gone.

He hadn't been kidnapped again, he must have left on his own. And there was only one way she couldn't sense him.

He was no longer in this time.

Stopping only to grab her bow, Kagome headed for the well.

...

Inuyasha sat in the branches of the sacred tree, trying to get a hold of himself. He was NOT afraid of the dark!

'What the fuck is wrong with me?' He thought. 'Why can't I just snap out of this?'

This week had been...strange. Not that he wasn't grateful for everything Kagome and her family had done for him. They had treated him far better than he had any right to expect. He just wasn't used to needing help (not that he would ever admit to anyone he needed help).

More than that, he wasn't sure just what his relationship with Kagome was now. Was he still her protector? Or was she now his? It was all so confusing, it was just easier to avoid her so he didn't have to think about it. That meant spending time with Momma (as she insisted he call her). She had treated him like a son, and he enjoyed her warmth. She had even tried to teach him to cook. Thankfully she hadn't insisted he eat his creations, which ended up looking like something Naraku might have spawned.

He also spent time with Kagome's grandfather, who had finally stopped trying to purify him. And of course there was Sota, who liked to watch the thing he called a TV with him. Inuyasha didn't quite understand what the stories were about, though Sota tried to explain that the men with the golden hair who spent all the time standing in place and yelling were great warriors who defended the planet.

Inuyasha shook his head and jumped down to the ground. He wasn't quite as dense as most thought he was. He knew that, sooner or later, he would have to talk with Kagome and find out if she still wanted him to protect her. Or if he even could protect her now. More than anything he worried he had lost his nerve. He hadn't drawn the Tessaiga since the day he was kidnapped, and worried it would no longer transform for him.

He was just deciding whether he should head back through the well or go see what Kaede and Shippo were doing when a small, furry bundle ran up to him and jumped in his arms.

"Inuyasha!" Shippo buried his face in his chest. "You're back!"

Inuyasha nearly fell over as he tried to peel the kitsune off of his clothes. "Of course I am runt. Why wouldn't I be?"

Shippo looked up at him, and something in his eyes made Inuyasha pause. "We were all so worried about you." He blinked, seemingly just noticing Inuyasha's short hair. "Um...you look weird with short hair."

"Hey it wasn't my choice." The hanyou replied before Shippo climbed onto his shoulder. "So, Miroku and Sango still gone then?"

"Yeah." Shippo told him. "It's been so boring! Kaede is always doing her miko stuff and never has any time to play!" He hugged the back of Inuyasha's head.

Inuyasha nodded in agreement about how boring miko things were before he opened his eyes. "Hey wait a second! What were you doing out here at this hour?"

"Nothing..." Shippo cringed and tried to pull away, looking guilty as hell. Inuyasha grabbed the boy by his tail and shook him, causing a rain of ripe cherries to fall from within the boy's clothes.

Inuyasha held the kitsune up to his face, glaring at him before smirking. "You know what Kagome said she'd do if she caught you stealing from the village again."

"Aw come on!" Shippo crossed his arms as he hung upside-down. "She was just kidding." A look of fear crossed his face. "Right?"

Inuyasha was about to carry the little thief back to Kaede when he caught a whiff of a familiar scent. Kagome was climbing out of the well, and she didn't look too happy.

"Inuyasha!" She shouted. "What are you doing here?"

"Just getting some air." He shouted right back. "What, am I not allowed to?"

Kagome was happy to see him acting like his old self, and to hear his voice. But she was still mad at him. "You scared me half to death!"

"Kagome!" Shippo squirmed in Inuyasha's grip. "Don't believe him! He's a liar!"

Kagome hadn't even noticed Shippo, she had been so focused on Inuyasha. "Wait, what?"

"I caught him sneaking cherries again." Inuyasha smirked, holding Shippo up to her. The kitsune grinned sheepishly as he hung by his tail before a very angry-looking Kagome.

"Shippo, go back to Kaede. I'll deal with you later." Kagome ordered him in a tone that said this was not negotiable. Shippo gulped and nodded before Inuyasha let him down, running back towards the village and desperately hoping Kagome would forget before she carried out her threat.

Suddenly alone, Inuyasha and Kagome stood in silence for almost a minute. She could feel that he wasn't going to say anything, so finally she worked up her courage. Her expression softened, and she took his hands in hers before he could pull away.

"Why have you been avoiding me?"

Inuyasha cringed at the question, but it was clear she wasn't going to let him go without answering her.

"I...I don't know."

Kagome let one of his hands go, then reached up to rub one of his dog ears. "Please Inuyasha, I need to know. I promise I won't get mad, no matter what you say."

Inuyasha sighed as she rubbed the soft fur on his ear, closing his eyes. "Because I let you down. I always protected you, and then I couldn't even protect myself."

He opened his eyes. "What if it happens again? What if next time you get hurt or killed because I'm too weak to stop it? I'm too scared to even draw the Tessaiga now, too worried it won't transform for me anymore." He pulled away from her and turned around.

"You should go with Koga. He's strong enough to protect you. I'm sorry I'm so weak. But I still wish to travel with you, if you'll have me."

Inuyasha listened for a response, waiting for her to agree. He hoped that she would at least want to keep him around for a while as a pet or something.

To his surprise he began to smell salt. He turned as a crying Kagome embraced him.

"Oh Inuyasha!" She sobbed. "You don't need to apologize to me. You did nothing wrong. And you are not weak!"

Inuyasha stood stock still, before wrapping his arms around her as an incredible sense of relief washed over him.

"You're the strongest, bravest person I've ever known. I'm sorry for what I said. I did miss you. I missed you every moment of every day you were gone." Kagome wailed, burying her face in his chest. "I know I haven't treated you very well. I know I've abused the beads. I'm sorry for it. It would serve me right if you slammed me into the ground as hard as you can."

Inuyasha's mouth hung open at that. "It didn't hurt..." He began, but was cut off by her sobs.

"You should hate me. I've done nothing but hurt you ever since we met. I don't deserve your forgiveness."

Inuyasha grabbed Kagome's face, gently raising it until she was looking into his eyes. "Kagome, you know that isn't true. You saved me. You took care of me. I don't hate you. I could never hate you." He stared into her sad, wet eyes, and without thinking he leaned down and kissed her.

Kagome was surprised at first, but quickly returned the kiss and grabbed his head in her hands. His lips were much softer than she had imagined they would be. Once it was over she stared into his golden eyes.

"Inuyasha..." She swallowed.

"I'm sorry." He pulled back, clearly expecting a sit for that.

Kagome felt his reluctance and fear. "No, it's okay." She grabbed him and pulled his face to hers again. "Things are going to be different from now on. I never want you to be afraid around me or think you have to hide your feelings. I want you to be yourself. I want you to be able to trust me." She took a deep breath.

"Because...because I love you."

She had hoped he would feel the same way, and seeing him scowl afterwards nearly broke her. Until he spoke.

"I smell wolf."

Kagome looked up as she felt two jewel shards approaching them at high speed.

'Oh come on! Why now!'

In moments Koga stood before them. He took one look at the two of them in each other's arms and, faster than the eye could see, punched Inuyasha in the face so hard he was knocked against the sacred tree.

Kagome fell to the ground in agony. She couldn't believe how much it hurt.

"What did I tell you about bothering my woman dogshit?!" Koga shouted as he ran towards Inuyasha, jumping and landing with a stomp aimed at the other boy's head that would surely have caved in his skull if Inuyasha hadn't gotten out of the way. Inuyasha jumped back up, growling at the wolf.

"Too bad you didn't stay gone mutt." Koga taunted him as he kicked Inuyasha in the ribs. "Now I have to beat you while Kagome watches."

Kagome gritted her teeth as she pulled herself to her feet. Inuyasha was dodging Koga's blows, but something seemed off about this fight. Opening herself to Inuyasha's feelings, she found her answer.

Inuyasha knew he couldn't fight back too hard. Kagome liked Koga, she protected him. If he tried to seriously fight back she would sit him. He had always held back against Koga because she wanted him too.

Because a part of him was sure she preferred a full-blooded youkai over a dirty hanyou.

A fresh wave of guilt washed over her. She tried to call out, to tell Inuyasha to fight back, but another blow from Koga knocked her back to the ground.  
Inuyasha looked over to her and saw her fall. He tried to get to her, only to be knocked down by Koga.

"Why don't you use your sword dogshit?!' The wolf youkai taunted as he placed his hands around Inuyasha's neck and began to squeeze. "You were almost a challenge with it. Without it you're as weak as your whore of a mother."

Inuyasha's snarled as he suddenly flipped them over so he was on top of Koga. "Don't you dare speak of my mother that way!"

Koga kicked Inuyasha off of him before standing up. "Who's going to stop me dogshit? You?"

"Get away from him!"

A huge red explosion suddenly engulfed Koga, throwing him off of his feet and over beyond the sacred tree. As his vision cleared he found himself staring up at a very angry-looking Kagome, holding her bow with an arrow pointed right at his heart, and surrounded by a red aura that burned so bright it nearly turned night into day.

"Koga," She began in a voice filled with cold rage. "I hope you're listening. I might get annoyed with you if I have to repeat myself."

Once she had his attention Kagome put her bow onto her back and picked the wolf up by his neck with one hand, her strength augmented by her powerful aura. Red light streamed from her eyes as she reached under his kilt, her hand closing around her target as Koga squealed.

"If you ever so much as look at Inuyasha again, I'm going to cut your balls off, put them on a string, and wear them around my neck!" Smoke began to pour out of her clenched hand as the wolf howled in pain. "Do you understand me?!"

Koga nodded frantically. "Yes! Yes I understand!"

"You are nothing compared to him! He has always been there for me, has always protected me. You only come around too annoy him. Well no more. I am not your woman and I never will be! Understand?!" She released his appendage and threw him to the ground.

"Give me your jewel shards. Now!"

"Th-they're yours!" He stammered as he removed the shards from his legs and tossed them to the ground.

Kagome looked to Inuyasha, who was seemingly unable to close his mouth. "Inuyasha, do you want to do anything to him?"

Inuyasha looked to be seriously considering it, then shrugged. "I think he's learned his lesson."

Kagome nodded. "Now get out of here before he changes his mind!"

The wolf stood up and ran as fast as he could, which wasn't nearly as fast as he had been with his jewel shards. His new limp didn't help much either.

Kagome took a deep breath, the red aura fading. Inuyasha caught her before she could collapse. He gently let her down until she was sitting in his lap.

"What was that?" He asked, unable to conceal his shock. Not that he hadn't enjoyed seeing Koga humiliated for a change. "How did you...?"

"It...it's a long story." She sighed and leaned against him, enjoying his warmth.

"Yeah? Well I don't have anywhere I need to be." Inuyasha replied, clearly not going to drop the issue.

Kagome looked down to the ground. She had hoped she could put off telling him for at least a while longer. Still, she did want him to trust her, and that meant being honest with him.

"It all started the night we rescued you..."


	11. Under The Stars

Chapter 11: Under The Stars

And so, watched by none but the stars, Kagome told Inuyasha everything that had happened. By the end of her story Inuyasha's eyes were tightly shut, his mouth firmly closed. Kagome could feel his grief and knew it was something he would have to go through, but she would be there for him.

"Kikyo loved you. She loved you so much. She wanted you to live your life." She told him before looking away.

"I'm so sorry. Maybe if I had..."

"Don't." Inuyasha interrupted her. "Don't go blaming yourself over this or anything else that's happened." He stood the both of them up and took a deep breath.

"Look, I'm gonna say some things, and they won't be easy for me. I want you to promise you won't interrupt me or run off before I can finish." He looked Kagome in the eyes as she felt him shove his grief down for the moment. Whatever it was it was clearly very important to him that she hear it. "Do you promise?"

Kagome nodded. "I promise. Say what you need to say."

Inuyasha steeled himself, then began to speak.

"First of all, get it out of your head that I hate you, for this or for any other reason. I've been annoyed and frustrated with you, I've been mad as hell at you, but I've never hated you and I never will. So stop thinking you have to play the martyr to prove yourself to me."

He grabbed Kagome's arms, making sure she was looking at him. "What happened to me isn't your fault. You don't have to make it up to me or feel like you need to punish yourself for it. Okay?"

Kagome leaned into his chest, nodding that she understood as she closed her eyes and enjoyed his presence. His smell reminded her of the forest, and she had greatly missed it when he was gone.

Inuyasha took another breath. He knew this would be hard on the both of them. "I love Kikyo. She was the first person in my life besides my mother to treat me like something besides a monster. I would have become human for her, just to be accepted."

Kagome thought her heart might stop. She knew what he was going to say next. That he wanted to use the jewel to resurrect her. And why wouldn't he after all? Kikyo had loved him without the need for the beads. She had trusted him. She had...

"But Kikyo, the real Kikyo, died a long time ago." Inuyasha continued, jolting Kagome from her thoughts. She looked up at him, eyes wide, as he continued.

"I didn't want to admit it to myself, but what that witch brought back...she was Kikyo and at the same time she wasn't. She was vengeful and filled with spite, nothing like the Kikyo I remembered. And...she just felt wrong. I swear I could feel her lack of a true soul. That's one of the reasons even when I went to see her I didn't stay long. I didn't feel the same way when I was with her as I did when I was with the real Kikyo."

He placed a hand on Kagome's chin, lifting her face to look at him.

"Or as I do when I'm with you."

Kagome couldn't believe what she was hearing. Was he really saying this?

"I'll mourn her in my own way. But it helps that it was her choice this time. That she finally let go of her anger and hate and became her old self before she died. I hope she finally found some peace."

Kagome hugged him, feeling a great relief. She had been terrified he would blame her for what happened to Kikyo.

Inuyasha hugged her back for a few moments, then let her go. "And the last thing. I want you to take these beads off of me. I could endure them if that was what it took for you too feel safe around me, but I can't fight anymore if I'm worried about you getting hurt when I do."

Kagome couldn't take it anymore, and even though she promised not too she interrupted him. "I'm sorry for that. I should have taken them off a long time ago. I trust you completely and I'm sorry I hurt you." Reaching up to his neck, she pulled the beads over his head and off. Kagome sighed as the sensation of Inuyasha's emotions in her mind faded. She would miss it, but he deserved to be free.

"You're free now. If you stay with me I want it to be because you want to, not because you think you have too or are afraid of what I'll do to you if you leave." She wiped her eyes. "Please forgive me."

Inuyasha closed his eyes as for the first time in nearly a year, he felt truly free. "Thank you."

They sat on the edge of the well for a while, then decided to head back home. Once they were both safe in Kagome's bed she held Inuyasha like she had that night one week ago, his hands tightly gripping her shirt as she stroked his ears. He had been holding back his grief for Kikyo so he could speak with her, tell her what had to be said, but now it came pouring out of him. But this time instead of the frenzied sobbing of the week before he simply cried quietly.

Kagome knew this wouldn't be the last time she had to hold him at night. He still had a long way to go, they both did. But together, now as equals, she knew they would get through it.

...

Miroku sat cross-legged out in front of the village headman's home, looking at the stars. Sometime, when he was alone at night, he wondered about them. He supposed people had since the first human had cast their eyes up and seen them. Kagome had once said something about them being huge balls of fire that laid very far away. Some said they could be read like scrolls, revealing human fate. Some went even further and claimed all human action was predetermined by the movements of the stars, and thus there was no true free will.

He hoped that wasn't true. All of his life had been a fight against fate. Against the curse Naraku had laid on his family. To find out that everything he did was predetermined, that nothing he did could possibly matter, would have been crushing.

"Can't sleep?"

Miroku looked behind him to see Sango, wearing only a simple yukata. She sat down next to him.

"I was just thinking about the stars." He told her. "Do you believe they govern our destinies?"

Sango paused, looking at her feet. "I hope not." She responded after a while. "If everything we do is predestined, what's the point of living in the first place?"

"I guess to some it would be comforting to believe that nothing is truly their fault. That it's all fate." He said. "But I've never believed that. Like you said, what would be the point of living?"

They sat in silence for a few minutes before Sango looked up at him. "About the bath. What you said..."

"I'm sorry for that." He bowed. "I didn't think..."

Sango took his cursed hand in hers. "Did you mean what you said? That there is no one you'd rather be with?"

Miroku looked into her eyes, then nodded. "Yes. But it's not fair to you. Or to any children we might have."

Sango squeezed his hand tighter.

"I could die any day now. Could you really love a man like that? One who could be gone tomorrow?"

She reached forwards, hugging him. "I don't care if we only get another month. Another week, a day, an hour, a minute. I still want to spend it with you."

Miroku resisted the urge to hug her back. "And what about children? I've been thinking about this for a while now, and though I wish to avenge my father and grandfather, it isn't worth putting a child through what I've gone though. If I must die of this curse, I should be the last to do so."

Sango held onto him. "I have my own reasons to not want to have a child right now. If I did, Naraku would surely try to use it against us just as he has Kohaku." She pulled him forwards until he was looking at her.

"But we will destroy Naraku! You have to believe it! One day he will be gone and we can be married!"

Miroku leaned in closer. "When you say it like that, you make me believe it."

"You should!" Sango said, sounding a little annoyed. "Why do you think he only uses his spawn or puppets to attack us? Why does he run if we get close on the few occasions he actually tries to fight us? Because he's afraid of us! Kagome nearly destroyed him once by herself, and he knows that if we all manage to trap him where he can't run away he won't stand a chance!"

The monk's mouth hung open. He had never seen Sango so confident. "I...never considered it that way."

"And it's not just us he has to worry about!" Sango continued. "He has made enemies all over! Koga and his tribe, Sesshomaru, and probably others we don't even know about! No wonder than he hardly ever dares show his face!"

She paused, looking around and blushing as she realized she had been yelling in the middle of the night. She hoped she hadn't woken up their hosts.

"You say you're a man of faith." She whispered. "Well I'm asking you to have faith in your friends. And in yourself."

Miroku slowly put his arms around her, before leaning over and kissing her. Sango eagerly returned the kiss, melting into his arms.

"You're right." He agreed after breaking the kiss. "We will win. And once this is all over I'll make you my wife if you'll have me."

Sango grabbed onto his robe, pulling him in for another kiss.

"I won't have it any other way."

...

The next morning Kimiko helped Kagome pack her backpack as she and Inuyasha got ready to return to the feudal era. She wished they could stay, but Inuyasha had insisted that it was time they resumed their journey. He had enjoyed the warmth and love of her family (to say nothing of the joy of a hot shower whenever he wanted it), but Naraku and the jewel shards couldn't wait any longer.

"We've wasted too much time because of me already." He angrily huffed. But once no one was in the room except the two of them he hugged Kimiko.

"Thank you." He told her. "Thank you for all that you've done for me. I'll never be able to repay you."

Kimiko was a bit shocked at first, unused to Inuyasha being so affectionate, but quickly returned the hug. "You're welcome Inuyasha. Remember that you will always have a home here."

Once they were through the well Inuyasha and Kagome headed for Kaede's village, both to pick up a few things and to get Shippo. Inuyasha gleefully reminded Kagome that she still had to punish the kitsune for stealing cherries.

"You don't have to act so happy about it." She scolded him. "He's just a little boy."

"Come on, you're practically his mom. It's your job to discipline him." Inuyasha explained, placing his hands behind his head. "If my mother had caught me doing half the things he's gotten away with I wouldn't sit for a week."

"Well that's not the way my mother does things, and it isn't my way either." Kagome told him before wagging her finger in his direction and smiling a little. "But I might make an exception with you if you don't drop that attitude."

"Oh I believe that." Inuyasha nodded and grinned. "After what I saw you do to that mangy wolf I'll have to be on my best behavior if I want to keep my balls." He saw her frown at that. "Hey, it was just a joke."

"It's not that..." Kagome sighed. "I just...I know I should have told Koga a long time ago I wasn't interested in him. It wasn't fair to him for me to let him think he had a chance with me." She looked up at her companion. "And it was especially unfair to you. I should have told him the truth the first time he came after me. Instead I let all of those fights happen."

Inuyasha took one of her hands in his as they walked. "Well I think he got the message last night. If he didn't, feel free to make good on your threat."

Kagome looked sad for a moment. "I hope I didn't hurt him to badly."

Inuyasha shook his head. "Youkai are tougher than you weak humans." He teased her. "Besides, you did him a favor. How long would it be before Naraku went after those two jewel shards and slaughtered the whole tribe for getting in his way?"

"Well when you put it that way..."

Kagome was about to say more when Inuyasha suddenly pulled his hand out of hers and used it to block her from going forwards. He sniffed the air and scowled.

"I smell wolf."

Kagome looked around, instinctively trying to sense jewel shards before she remembered that Koga didn't have any now. "Koga?"

"No..." Inuyasha sniffed again. "There are three of them."

Soon afterwards Ayame came running in their direction, followed closely by Ginta and Hakkaku.

"Sis!" Ginta shouted.

"And...Inuyasha?" Hakkaku turned his head slightly. "What happened to your hair?"

Inuyasha relaxed and crossed his arms. "Does no one besides me ever have their hair cut?"

Ayame ignored the boys as she walked up to Kagome. Instantly she was worried, the wolf girl looked like she hadn't slept all night.

"Ayame...what's wrong?"

The wolf girl scowled at her. "I should ask you that. Koga said he smelled you and him," She pointed to Inuyasha "And said he was going to check up on you. Then he never came back."

Kagome gasped at that. "Wait...you mean you don't know where he is?"

Ayame grabbed Kagome by her shirt. Inuyasha was about to shove the wolf girl off of her, but Kagome motioned him to stay back.

"What did you do to him?"

"Ayame, the truth is things didn't go well." Kagome told her. "I got angry at Koga and told him I didn't want to be with him. Then I subdued him and took his jewel shards."

Ayame glared at her. "You stole his jewel shards?!"

"Come on, those things were nothing but trouble." Inuyasha said. He was ready to jump in if it looked like Kagome was really in trouble. "I was just telling her, it was only a matter of time before Naraku wiped out his clan for them."

Kagome nodded. "But I swear to you, he was fine when I told him to go away."

The wolf girl growled at her. "If I find out you're lying to me..."

"I'm not lying." Kagome pulled herself free. "Inuyasha and I will help you look for him. Right Inuyasha?" She asked.

Inuyasha was about to tell her that the wolf could rot for all he cared, but when Kagome gave him her best 'Please?' look he simply rolled his eyes. "Keh! Fine, the sooner we get this over with the sooner I never have to see that mangy wolf again."


	12. Never Again

Chapter 12: Never Again

Together Kagome, Ayame, Ginta and Hakkaku, and a very reluctant Inuyasha had searched for Koga. His scent trail was easy enough to pick up before they had hit a stream, making further tracking impossible.

"Looks like he didn't want to be followed. Probably too embarrassed to go back to the others yet." Inuyasha told Kagome as he stood up from sniffing on all fours. He chuckled a little to himself as he remembered Kagome sending the wolf away with his tail between his legs. It was nice to see the wolf get his for once.

"This isn't funny. Ayame is really worried about him." She scolded him before looking up. Through the forest canopy she could tell it was getting close to sunset.

Inuyasha shrugged. "Yeah I know. For some reason she thinks that asshole is the love of her life even though he doesn't want anything to do with her."

Kagome leaned against a tree. "I think he does love her. He just doesn't know it yet." She replied.

Inuyasha shook his head. "Come on, you know he isn't like that. If he was he'd be all over her like he is you. He'd be back at his den making a litter of cubs with her instead of off sulking somewhere."

Kagome blushed at that before she noticed Inuyasha looking around nervously as the forest grew darker.

"Inuyasha?" She placed a hand on his shoulder. "Can we head in for the night? We can look again in the morning." She asked, hoping to spare his feelings.

"Yeah...yeah okay." He took her hand, gripping a little tighter than he had meant to. "But only because you want too."

...

"I don't get it." Ginta had said aloud as the human and hanyou approached. "It isn't like Koga to just take off on his own without letting the pack know..." He looked over to Inuyasha, who seemed to huddle close to Kagome.

"Maybe we should head in for the night?" Kagome suggested to the three wolves. Before she could say anything more Ginta interrupted her.

"You afraid of the dark or something?"

Inuyasha pulled away from Kagome and growled at him. "None of your fucking business wolf!"

Ginta quickly put his hands up and backed away. Although not particularly bright he knew he wouldn't stand a chance against Inuyasha. "Hey I didn't mean anything by it!"

"Inuyasha..." Kagome pulled on his sleeve. "Leave him alone."

The hanyou crossed his arms and gave Ginta a glare that made him shudder.

"Why don't you go ahead to Kaede's?" Kagome suggested to the angry hanyou. "Tell her we'll be having three guests."

Inuyasha gave all three wolves a dirty look, then nodded and headed for the village a little faster than he would usually run.

The four of them stood in silence. Kagome knew it was only a matter of time until one of them spoke, wanting an explanation for Inuyasha's strange behavior.

"Is he alright?" Ayame asked as Hakkaku peeked out from behind her. "Did something happen to him?"

"Everyone, come close." Kagome sighed and motioned them over to her. "Inuyasha is...well...do you remember when he was missing?"

"Wait, Inuyasha was missing too?" Ayame grabbed Kagome's shoulders as questions tumbled out of her mouth. "What happened? Do you think the same thing has happened to Koga? Why didn't you say anything?"

"Slow down." Kagome gently shook her off. "Like I said, about three weeks ago Inuyasha went missing after we had a fight. We couldn't find him anywhere, and eventually I asked Koga's clan to help."

"I remember." Hakkaku piped up. "Koga said that 'Dogshit has probably run off on you.'"

Kagome decided not to correct the wolf, since he was quoting Koga's exact words. "Yes, but then you two agreed to help me look for him anyway." She closed her eyes as she remembered what had happened next...

...

Inuyasha forced himself to slow his pace as he exited the forest. Outside of the trees there was still a little daylight left, along with the fires from the village. Despite himself, he was glad for the light the fires cast.

'Damn it, why can't I shake this?' He scolded himself. 'I'm not some little kid. I shouldn't be afraid of the dark no matter what they did to me. It's over and done with.'

Once in the village he passed by some young women. His sensitive ears picked up what they were saying, not that it usually bothered him. He was used to fearful looks and whispers in human villages, even when he was with his friends. Compared to that, their gossip wasn't much.

"I told you he didn't run off with another woman." One said.

"I wonder where he went?" Another questioned.

"Miko Kagome was very worried about him. If he were my husband I'd never let him out of the house." The third said. The other two nodded in agreement.

Inuyasha began to walk faster as he covered up his blush, almost bumping into a small boy who had been heading in the opposite direction.

"Hey watch it!" He grumbled before realizing it was Toshi, the boy who had broken his leg a few months ago. Toshi looked up at him and began smiling widely.

"Inuyasha!" The boy hugged him. "You're back!" He motioned to a group of nearby kids, who all came running. Inuyasha gulped as the crowd of children crashed into him, each of them trying to grab him, hug him, ask him questions, or see his sword.

"Alright alright, that's enough."

Inuyasha looked behind him as Kaede came running with Shippo on her shoulder. "Everyone head home now. Your parents will be looking for you."

A chorus of "AWWW"'s came from the children before they scattered. Inuyasha noted that Toshi's limp looked a little better than the last time he'd seen the boy.

"I've seen you fight hordes of youkai, yet you're afraid of a group of children?" Kaede shook her head.

"I wasn't afraid!" He shouted before catching himself. Kaede realized she'd said something she shouldn't have and tried to change the subject.

"I see you're no longer wearing the beads of subjugation." She pointed at his neck.

Inuyasha couldn't help himself from smirking a little even as Shippo gulped and hid behind Kaede's head. "Kagome took them off of me, don't even think about trying to put them on again." He told her. But his tone of voice was much less angry than it usually was when discussing the beads.

The old miko nodded. "I see." She looked to her side. "And...has she told you about anything important...?"

The hanyou sighed. "You don't have to try and sneak around it. Kagome told me everything. What I did, what Kikyo did for me, all of it."

They stood for a moment, then Inuyasha walked past her. "Kagome is bringing three mangy wolves for dinner." He was almost at her door, before letting out a breath and turning back.

"For what it's worth, I'm sorry about Kikyo. She deserved better."

...

"Kagome!"

Kagome had just stepped in the door when Shippo pounced on her. He gave her his best 'I'm adorable' face and she couldn't help but smile and ruffle his hair.

"Hello Shippo."

The three wolves followed her inside, sniffing at all of the odd smells. None of them had ever been in a human's home before, knowing only their tribes' stone-age societies.

"Did you bring me anything?" Shippo asked as he crowded around Kagome's backpack once she had set it down.

"Not so fast Shippo." Kagome picked him up around the waist and sat on the floor, setting him down in front of her. "We need to talk about what you did last night."

The kitsune cringed, looking down at his fox feet. "I'm still in trouble?"

"Yes you are." Kagome crossed her arms. "I know you know better than to steal from the village farms."

"I only took a little..." Shippo hid his hands behind his back. "Besides, Inuyasha told me he did it too when he was a boy."

Kagome shook her head. "That's different and you know it. Back then Inuyasha had no choice. He had no one to take care of him. You do." She looked up as the hanyou sat next to her.

"What...what are you gonna do?" The kitsune asked nervously.

She regarded him in what she hoped was a good imitation of a strict parent. "Inuyasha suggested I spank you."

Shippo's hands flew to his rear. "You...you wouldn't?" He began to sweat.

"But...that's not how my mother does things and it isn't going to be the way I do them either." Kagome told him after a few moments. Inuyasha gave her an annoyed huff even as Shippo looked relieved. "Instead I'm going to ground you for a week."

"Ground him...?" Inuyasha had a mental image of Kagome burying Shippo up to his neck and leaving him there for a week. Well, he guessed that was a punishment, but still pretty strange.

"That means that you are not allowed to leave Kaede's home for a week. No going outside, and no sweets." She explained.

"What?" The kitsune jumped into her lap. "But that's so boring! And I love sweets!"

"I know. That's why it's a punishment." Kagome wagged a finger at him. "And if you do go outside or steal sweets, you'll get grounded for even longer."

"It's not fair! You're mean!" Shippo stomped his feet, almost starting a full-blown tantrum.

"Quit that."

Inuyasha picked the boy up and stood. Kagome reached for him, but hesitated after Inuyasha mouthed to her that it was ok.

"Hey Kaede, do you still have that thing?" He called out to the old miko. She nodded, leaving the soup she was tending for a moment (after giving Ginta basic instructions on how to stir it) and went to her bedroom. A few moments later she returned carrying a small wooden box.

"Wh..what's that?" Shippo eyed the box nervously.

Kaede opened the box, revealing a small sword with a sheath laying next to it. It looked like a cleaner version of the untransformed Tessaiga, except Shippo-sized.

"This," Kaede began. "Is your sword."

"Mine?" The kitsune stared, eyes wide.

"I had Totosai make it from one of my fangs a while ago, before...you know." Inuyasha told him as he took the box from Kaede and held it up so the boy could have a better look. "It doesn't look like much now, but he said it will grow with you."

Shippo was mesmerized by the blade. He reached out for it, only for Inuyasha to pull it back.

"No, you have to show us that you deserve it first. You don't get it if we can't count on you to be responsible with it."

"You can! Honest!" Shippo looked up at him.

Inuyasha seemed to consider that for a moment. "I don't know... If you take you punishment like a man, then maybe I'll believe you." He told the boy.

Shippo nodded. "I will. I won't complain or whine about it anymore."

Inuyasha grinned a little. "Alright. If you make it too the end of the week it's yours. I'll even start training you. Can't give you a sword if you can't use it after all."

The boy jumped onto Inuyasha's chest and hugged him. "Thank you thank you!"

Kagome flashed Inuyasha a smile before Kaede announced that dinner was ready.

...

After dinner (during which Ginta and Hakkaku were scolded for their lack of manners by Kaede and were sentenced to help her clean up) Kagome motioned Inuyasha to follow her outside. Ayame had already left, going out too look for Koga on her own.

"That was a really nice thing you did for Shippo." She said, taking his hand.

Inuyasha blushed a little. "Yeah well, he needs to start pulling his weight." He paused. "Think your brother would like one?"

"Oh definitely, but Momma would kill you if she found out you gave Sota a sword." Kagome laughed. Inuyasha crossed his arms at that.

"Heh, I'll just say it was your idea." He teased her.

Kagome gave him mock punch on the arm. "Anyone ever tell you you're not as clever as you think you are?"

Inuyasha grinned, then sniffed the air.

"He's nearby." He sniffed again, then grabbed Kagome, put her on his back, and after taking a breath to steel himself (and telling himself he wasn't afraid of the dark) started running as fast as he could.

"Hey!" Kagome waved her arms before he reached a speed that she had to hold on. "What are you doing?"

Inuyasha jumped from rooftop to rooftop without even looking, instead turning to face her. "That wolf is fighting Miroku and Sango!" Behind them Ayame was running in the same direction, having also smelled Koga.

"What?" Kagome was sure she'd heard him wrong. "Why would they be fighting?"

"Hell if I know." Inuyasha replied. "But between the two of them, with no jewel shards, he shouldn't be a challenge for them."

...

Kagome looked ahead and saw a crowd in the distance. As they got close she could make out Miroku holding Koga back with his sutras, while Sango was making short work of a group of shambling figures with her hiraikotsu along with Kirara. But every time one of them fell, in moments it came back together and stood up again.

But there was something even more extraordinary than that. Kagome could sense jewel shards.

A lot of them.

No, one BIG shard...

"Inuyasha, I think Naraku's nearby!"

Inuyasha growled and ran faster, punching through one of the figures Sango and Kirara were fighting. As Kagome hopped off of him she could see that they were undead, more or less. They looked like zombies, held together by thorn-covered vines, with Naraku's hell wasps crawling in and out of their mouths and eye sockets. But her attention was quickly drawn to Koga as he broke through Miroku's sutras and punched him to the ground.

"Koga stop!"

The wolf turned to her, growling. His eyes glowed green, and the same vines were growing all over him, though not as thick as on the plant zombies (as she decided to call them). He howled and ran for her, only for Inuyasha to grab him at the last moment.

"Get your flea-bitten paws away from her wolf!" He shouted as they began to fight.

Kagome had no time to think as Miroku stood up, joining Sango and Kirara in trying to take down the seemingly indestructible plant zombies. She drew her bow and began firing, but even her spiritual powers could only do so much against so many. As Ayame caught up to them she ran to Koga, begging him to stop.

"Ayame stay back!" Kagome called before another vine grabbed her by the ankles, tripping her to the ground and dragging her into the nearby undergrowth.

"I can sell this one too."

Inuyasha froze at that voice, his eyes going wide as Koga jumped behind the figure who emerged from the bushes. Twice as big as any man, it was covered in thorny vines. More vines whipped around it's torso, one of them holding Ayame upside down. The light of the Shikon Jewel glowed from where it's heart would be. It's face though, was all too human and all too familiar.

"Naraku sends his regards." Renzo the slave trader said. More plant zombies arose from the ground, surrounding them.

...

Inuyasha trembled as he looked at Renzo. He barely felt it as vines grabbed all four of his limbs, pulling him towards the slaver.

"You were a very bad dog." Renzo said in a voice that dripped with malice. "It's back to the flogging block and the dark room, where disobedient slaves belong."

Inuyasha knew he couldn't stop him. He was weak. He was a weak half-breed that existed only to serve his betters.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw Kagome fall. He had failed her. He was weak and useless. He had failed Kagome just as he had failed Kikyo and his mother. A thorn-covered vine snaked around his neck, choking off his breathing. His vision blurred as his lungs screamed for air. As the darkness closed in around him he could think of only one thing.

He had failed...

_Momma, why won't you wake up?_

_Kikyo...? I thought..._

_Inuyasha!_

.

.

.

.

**NO!**

Inuyasha's eyes snapped open as he pulled on the vines with all of his might.

"I WON'T FAIL AGAIN!"

The vines tore from Renzo's body. Before his feet hit the ground Inuyasha had already drawn Tessaiga and cut the monster in half. As Koga ran to stop him he sent the wolf sprawling with a single kick.

"Kagome!" He cut down the plant zombies, grabbing the girl and jumping her away from them. To his relief she was only stunned, and quickly drew an arrow as he unleashed a wind scar that cut through most of the plant zombies.

"You two!" He shouted to Miroku and Sango. "Handle the wolf! Don't kill him! Ayame! Kirara! Keep these things off of them!" He growled and charged Renzo. More vines grabbed at him, trying to trip him up and slow him down.

"You can't stop me now dog!" Renzo shouted, one massive fist punching Inuyasha and sending him into a tree. "You're just a scared little slave begging Master for mercy. That's all you ever were."

"I'm no one's slave! Never again!" Inuyasha unleashed another wind scar that tore Renzo apart. But in moments he had regrown, sending out more vines.

"Remember how you would beg me not to put you in the dark room?" The slaver laughed, grabbing Inuyasha's leg and slamming him to the ground. The hanyou struggled to get free, cutting him in half and landing on his feet. Inuyasha growled and hacked away at the creature, but it was quickly becoming clear it was a useless endeavor.

Renzo grabbed all four of the boy's limbs once again, this time with three vines on each, and slammed him over and over into the ground until he dropped the Tessaiga. The stunned Inuyasha then felt another vine around his neck grasp on and pull, trying to tear his head off.

"Get away from him!"

Renzo screamed as a purification arrow exploded in his back, leaving a gaping hole through which the incomplete Shikon Jewel glowed blood red from corruption. He shot out three more vines that grabbed Kagome and pulled her to him. "You bitch! I'm going to...AHHHHHH!"

The monster screamed as a red aura shrouded Kagome, burning through his vines. As she dropped to the ground she readied and fired another arrow, this one glowing with the same red light. Renzo howled in pain as it burned his corrupted flesh before blasting him to pieces.

"That was for Inuyasha!" Kagome shouted before she ran to the dog-eared boy. As Renzo began to regrow Inuyasha grabbed the Tessaiga.

"Kagome, give me a hand here!"

Kagome grabbed onto the sword hilt with him and concentrated, sending her red aura into the Tessaiga. The blade blazed with red fire before Inuyasha unleashed another wind scar that tore Renzo apart and burned away most of what was left.

Left with only one arm and no legs, Renzo clutched at the Shikon Jewel and willed it to heal him. But then one of Naraku's hell wasps grabbed it from him and began to fly away along with the rest of them. Renzo screamed in rage at the betrayal, even as his body collapsed back into the rotting corpse it had been before Naraku had revived him. Around them the plant zombies all collapsed into mush and bones.

"Not this time!" Inuyasha jumped into the cloud of hell wasps, clawing them apart with both hands as he was stung repeatedly. As he fell to the ground the cloud of wasps flew higher and higher before finally fading from sight.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome ran to him, but stopped dead in her tracks as he stood up. He was battered and bloody, and covered in wasp stings. But his look of triumph told her everything she needed to know even if she hadn't been able to sense it.

In his right palm, he held the incomplete Shikon Jewel. 


	13. Believe In Yourself

Chapter 13: Believe In Yourself

Inuyasha stared at the glowing red jewel in his hand. The Shikon Jewel. He had desired it for so long, only to have to give up on it when he learned what his youkai side was really like...

"Inuyasha?"

Maybe it was still possible to become a full youkai with it? He wouldn't go mad this time. He had earned this after all, hadn't he? He, who had sacrificed so much, deserved this.

"Inuyasha, please give me the jewel. It's corrupted, I need to purify it."

He would be powerful and respected. He would get revenge on everyone who had ever hurt him.

Sesshomaru would be forced to kneel before him and kiss his feet.

He'd slaughter the entire wolf tribe as Koga was forced to watch.

He'd punish Kagome for all of those sits, show her what it was like to be someone's slave...

No!

Inuyasha dropped the jewel like it was white-hot. "Get that thing away from me!" He shouted. He began to feel weak. His vision blurred before the ground rushed up to meet him, then all was darkness and silence.

...

Kagura watched with satisfaction as Naraku raged through what remained of the palace he had stolen. While the mind-controlled boy and the girl who was the literal incarnation of void looked on impassively, she alone was able to both understand and take pleasure in Naraku's anger.

"I told you it was a stupid idea to lend the jewel out again." She mocked him. "But you just had to push your luck."

Naraku turned from tearing down a wall, his tentacles receding into his human-like body as he gave her a death glare. "Silence."

Kagura smirked, crossing her arms. "You're a fool. You always go for the hurt instead of the kill. If it were up to me they'd be long dead."

Naraku stood, walking towards her. She did not budge, staring at him as spite flowed through her. "Now you're not even half as powerful as you were are you? It's only a matter of time before they kill you."

The evil hanyou wrapped a tentacle around her neck, lifting her off of the ground. "I'm still strong enough to end your existence whenever I feel like!"

Kagura pulled at the tentacle before he suddenly dropped her to the floor. She gasped for air, then stood.

"But you won't." She coughed. "No one will work for you, word has gotten out what a traitorous bastard you are. You can't make anymore spawn without the jewel." She gestured to herself, Kanna, and Kohaku. "We're all you've got."

Naraku shook with rage, then gave her a wicked smile and backhanded her to the floor. "I will get it back. And much as it pains me to admit it, you are correct. I've been toying with Inuyasha and the others for too long." He turned to leave.

"It's time they died."

...

_Dog obeys Master._

_Dog loves Master._

_No Master, please don't put Dog in the dark room again! Dog is sorry!_

_Who is the girl? She has angered Master..._

_Mother? Dog...remembers Mother...._

.

.

.

_Ka...go...me?_

.

.

.

_Rip them apart! Shred their flesh! Kill! Kill! Kill!_

"No!"

Inuyasha's eyes snapped open. He was covered in sweat. He was on his back, laying in a bed with the blankets pulled up to his neck.

"Easy, easy..." Kagome's face appeared above him, her voice calm and soothing as she placed a wet cloth on his forehead. "You're okay."  
Inuyasha's breathing slowly returned to normal. Looking around he saw he was back at Kaede's. "What happened?"

"You had a bad reaction to all of that wasp venom." Kagome told him. "That was dumb what you did, but also very brave." She looked down as he suddenly grabbed her wrists, sniffing.

"Did I hurt you?" He asked, the pain in his eyes bringing her back to that awful night she had found him in the slaver's dungeon.

"What? No of course not! Why would you think that?" Kagome pulled her hand from him.

"You smell of blood and burnt flesh." He said in a tone that was almost an accusation.

A scream rang out from the next room over before Kagome could say anything. Inuyasha struggled to stand, only for her to gently force him back down. She sighed sadly.

"That's Koga."

The dog-eared boy blinked, sniffing her again. The wolf's scent was all over her.

"What's wrong with him?" He finally asked.

Kagome took the cloth from his forehead and placed it in a bucket of cool water. "Do you remember those vines growing out of the walking corpses?" When Inuyasha nodded she continued. "When we killed that monster, the ones in Koga didn't die. They just kept growing. We've had to cut and burn them out of him. It's his only chance to survive."

Another scream tore though the air, followed by Kaede's shouts to Sango and Miroku to hold him down. Kagome cringed, then placed the wet cloth back on his forehead.

"You should go help."

Kagome looked up at that. She had thought Inuyasha hated Koga. "Are you sure? Will you be okay?"

"I can be alone for a little while." He assured her, sitting up. Kagome smiled and rubbed one of his dog ears, a gesture he had come to like these past few days.

"Alright, but take it easy. You almost died." She stood and went to the next room, sliding the door closed behind her.

Inuyasha listened to her footsteps, and once they were gone he stood and headed out the door.

'Sorry Kagome, but this is for the best.'

...

Kagome was glad Ginta and Hakkaku had volunteered to take Shippo out with them for a few hours (during which Shippo was temporarily un-grounded). The kitsune didn't need to see what was happening to Koga. Ayame had insisted on staying, lending what help she could. But as the thorny vines had spread so far into Koga, Kagome and Kaede had been forced to cut deep and burn away the growths. Koga had already bitten through three strips of leather, and it was all Miroku and Sango could do to hold him down. At one point the wolf had become delirious, crying for his mother. Ayame sat with him, holding his hands as he screamed and struggled.

When it was finally done Kagome and Kaede had wrapped Koga in bandages, then laid him down and covered him with a blanket.

"Be honest with me." Ayame asked them. "Will he recover?"

Kagome looked to Kaede. The old miko took a deep breath. "I don't know. Even if he lives there is likely to be scarring. His right hand is another problem. The vines have grown straight through the bones, meaning it is unlikely he will ever get full use of it again."

"I'm sorry." Kagome placed her hand on Ayame's shoulder. "Maybe if I had..."

"This isn't you're fault." Ayame sighed as she stroked the unconscious wolf youkai's hair. "I wish it was. It would be easier if I could blame this all on you." She squeezed Kagome's hand. "Thank you for everything you've done."

Kagome smiled and went across the room to where Miroku and Sango were sitting and sharing a small dinner, along with Kirara sitting on Sango's lap.

"I still can't believe it." Miroku said as he ate a rice ball. "Inuyasha has struck a major blow against Naraku."

Kagome nodded, taking the jar that hung from her neck off and looking within. Inside the nearly complete Shikon jewel glowed pink.

"It still doesn't feel real." She thought out loud. "I keep thinking it must be a trap."

"Maybe Naraku isn't as clever as he thinks." Sango told her before changing the subject. "Inuyasha looks to be doing much better."

"He is." Kagome grinned a little at that. "Sometimes it's hard, but I think he really is getting better."

'And so have we.' She thought to herself as she remembered that kiss.

Miroku raised his eyebrow. "Kagome, you're blushing."

Kagome gasped and turned away. "No I'm not!"

A loud thump came from the other room, followed by cursing. Kagome quickly stood up and headed for the door.

...

"Inuyasha? You okay?"

The hanyou lay on the floor next to the door to the outside, grumbling to himself. He slowly stood and struggled to walk towards her.

"Kagome..."

She ran to him, helping him to the bed. "Didn't I tell you to take it easy?"

"Sorry..." He said after a moment. "I had to go outside. Needed to get something." He grabbed her wrist, then placed something in her hand. When he pulled his hand back she could see what it was.

The beads of subjugation.

"What's this for?" She was getting worried. Did he want her to put them on Koga? Maybe he didn't trust the wolf to stay away?

Inuyasha looked her in the eyes. "I want you to put them back on me. Have Kaede redo the spell."

Kagome was sure she'd heard him wrong. Or maybe the wasp venom had affected his mind? Inuyasha hated the beads, and the more she thought about it the more she disliked them too, and the more she was ashamed of how she had abused them.

"Inuyasha...why?" She finally managed to force herself to speak.

Inuyasha grabbed one of her hands. "When I touched the jewel, I saw things. I saw myself as a youkai again. I killed a lot of people, and I liked it." He looked away in shame. "I...hurt you...then I killed you." He shut his eyes.

'Oh no.'

"I can't be trusted not to hurt you."

'Please don't say it.'

The hanyou lowered his head for her to put the beads around his neck.

"I'm a monster."

Kagome grabbed Inuyasha by the shoulders and shook him. "Stop it! Don't ever say that again!" She clenched her fist around the beads and concentrated, turning them to ash. "You are not a monster! What you saw was just the lingering taint of Naraku's corruption in the jewel! It wasn't you!"

Inuyasha stared in shock at her outburst. He had to try to talk some sense into her.

"How can you be so sure?" He shouted back. "How can I ever trust myself? You...you didn't see what I did..."

"I don't need to see it!" She wrapped her arms tightly around him. "Inuyasha, I **know** you! I know you would never hurt me!" She squeezed him tighter, tears filling her eyes as he hugged her back.

Kagome's heart ached for him. All of his life Inuyasha had been told that he was worthless, a mistake, and a monster. It wasn't a surprise that, under his bragging and show of arrogance, deep down he believed it. His kidnapping and torture/brainwashing hadn't helped his self-esteem either.

"Please Inuyasha," She begged. "I don't need those things to be able to trust you. Please have faith in yourself. You're so much better than you realize." She looked into his eyes, slowly leaned in, and kissed him. By the time she pulled back she saw that his golden eyes were also shining with tears. He laid back, letting her head rest on his chest. She softly stroked his ears. "Please, believe in yourself."

Inuyasha slowly nodded, enjoying the tender moment between them.

...

Inuyasha woke up as sunlight hit his face. He grimaced in annoyance, then noticed Kagome was asleep with her head on his chest. She looked so beautiful, so peaceful, that he couldn't bare to wake her.

So, that was that then. No more beads of subjugation. Kagome had made her thoughts on the matter very clear to him. He only hoped that he truly was worthy of the trust she had in him.

'I promise.' He thought. 'I promise I'll die before I ever hurt you.'

Careful not to wake her, he leaned up and kissed her forehead.

Meanwhile Miroku and Sango were walking outside in the nearby forest, gathering a few plants Kaede needed.

"So...looks like the end is coming soon." Sango said as she placed a bag of plants on Kirara's back.

"Hmm?" Miroku asked as he gathered bark from a tree. "What do you mean?"

"Naraku." She told him. "We have most of the jewel now. He will try to get it back. He can't just sit back and send endless amounts of spawn at us anymore, not without the jewel, so he'll have to do it himself."

The monk nodded, walking up to her. "Are you worried?"

Sango sighed. "Yes. I worry that he'll sacrifice Kohaku. I've held out hope that I can get him back...but at this point, after all he's been though." She paused. "It might be a mercy if he were to die."

Miroku took her hands. "I promise you, if there is a way to save him we'll find it." He gently kissed her. "I promise."

The slayer eagerly kissed him back. This had become their little ritual, each reassuring the other that things would work out.

"Ewwww gross!"

Shippo stood a short distance away with his tongue out, along with the two wolves.

"Uh...sorry to interrupt." Hakkaku blushed.

"Kaede wanted us to check what was taking you so long. Breakfast will be ready soon." Ginta added, also blushing. He quickly picked up Shippo and headed back with his packmate.

For a few moments the two of them stood in silence, then both began to laugh.

...

After breakfast the group sat in front of Kaede's. Kagome sat next to Inuyasha, while Miroku and Sango sat together. Both couples could tell that things had changed between them.

"Sango and I...we plan to marry once this is over with." Miroku announced.

Inuyasha smirked, then covered his ears as Kagome let out a high-pitched squeal.

"Owww! Cut that out!" He shouted. Sometimes having superhuman senses wasn't so great, particularly when his traveling companion seemed to find everything 'SO CUTE!'.

"I'm sorry, but it's so cute!" She squealed again. She ran up and hugged Sango tightly, until the slayer had to ask her to let her breath.

Inside Kaede's home the old miko was sitting with Ayame, showing her how to change Koga's bandages and keep his wounds clean.

"And then you tie them off, just like that." She instructed. Ayame moved to repeat what she had seen, before a hand reached up and grabbed her wrist.

"Koga?" She gasped.

The wolf youkai's eyes slowly opened.

"Where...is...Inuyasha?"


	14. Nature of The Beast

Chapter 14: Nature of The Beast

When she stopped to think about it, Kagome had led a happy and carefree life. Sure she had lost her father at a young age, but she still had a supportive family. She had friends who worried about her. She had people who cared for her, cared about her. Compared to Sango's loss of her family and entire village, Miroku spending more than half his life knowing death could come at any time, and of course the tragedy that had been Inuyasha's life, she had very little reason to complain.

But things had changed once she had entered the feudal era. Suddenly she was exposed to life at it's most cruel.

She had seen some terrible things. She had seen children torn to pieces by youkai. She had seen her friends suffer and been helpless to do anything about it. She had seen villages wiped out by bandits who did it for no other reason than because they could.

But she had refused to let all of the horror around her harden her heart. She had long ago resolved to do what she could to help, just like Momma had always taught her. And even if she sometimes didn't live up to those ideals, she still held them dear. It was a part of who she was.

But now, as she looked at the figure that leaned on Ayame for support, covered in bandages, she knew that her resolve was about to be tested again.

"Don't everyone stop talking just because of me." Koga spat out bitterly. The bandages covered part of his face, including his left eye. The right, however, seemed to stare right through her.

The group stared for a moment in silence, before Kagome stood and slowly approached him. "Koga, you should be resting. Your body needs time to heal. Here, let me help..."

"Don't touch me!" He snarled, stopping her dead in her tracks. "You've done enough!"

Ayame struggled to hold him still, finally forcing him to sit down on the step. Koga's single exposed eye then went to Inuyasha.

"I suppose this makes you happy, huh dogshit?" He asked.

Inuyasha stood. Kagome reached out her hand to grab him in case he wanted to attack Koga, before pulling it back. No, she had resolved to trust Inuyasha. She wouldn't control him like an animal anymore.

"Don't blame Kagome for your own actions wolf."

Everyone, Ayame included, looked to him. "This isn't his fault!" The wolf princess shouted.

Inuyasha smirked. "You really haven't figured it out? None of you?"

"What are you talking about?" Kagome wasn't sure she was going to like what she was about to hear.

Inuyasha shook his head. "You know, compared to humans youkai are easy to read. Most don't even think to conceal their motives, and those that do are never any good at it." He stared at the wolf prince. "Those vines, how is it that they were growing from **inside** of you?"

Koga remained silent, even as Kagome gasped after a moment. "He was ambushed and forced to swallow a seed or something by that monster."

"Not quite." Inuyasha replied before turning back to Koga, his eyes filled with anger. "Do you want to tell her or should I?"

Koga spat on the ground, then looked up at him. "He said it would give me power..."

All eyes went to the injured wolf.

"He said it would be even greater than the jewel shards."

Ayame grabbed Koga's hand, squeezing as she forced him to look at her. "Why?"

Koga pulled his hand from her with a hiss, ignoring the hurt in her eyes. "Why do you think?! I was going to kill dogshit! He's turned Kagome against me!"

Kagome stood up, grabbing Inuyasha's hand. She was more concerned than angry at the moment. It was clear to her that Koga was latching onto anger so he didn't have to feel sadness and pain. She had become very familiar with that particular coping mechanism ever since meeting Inuyasha. "Koga, Inuyasha didn't turn me against you. I love him." She closed her eyes. "I'm sorry about what I did. You didn't deserve that. But if you had killed Inuyasha I still wouldn't go with you. I'd hate you."

They all sat in silence for a moment, before Inuyasha began again.

"That's right. He'd have to do something so you'd have no choice but to do whatever he said." Inuyasha looked through the open door to Shippo as the kitsune sat inside the house watching them with Kaede.

"Like take a hostage."

Kagome's hand went to her mouth. No, no it couldn't be. He wouldn't... But then again, he was very jealous. He was convinced she was the love of his life. And he had kidnapped both her and Shippo before...

"Koga, you weren't going too..." Ayame began before he slowly stood, leaning against her for support.

The wolf was silent, then laughed humorlessly. He refused to look at Inuyasha as he spoke. "Heh. Maybe you're not as dumb as you look mutt."

Kagome resisted the urge to run and hug Shippo. Instead she stood, her free hand tightly clenched.

"But that's not all you were planning, was it?" Inuyasha looked over to Sango and Miroku. "They'd try to stop you."

"He'd have to get rid of us?" Sango guessed out loud, one hand on her hiraikotsu. Koga flinched, but said nothing.

Miroku nodded. "If he was strong enough to kill Inuyasha...what chance would we have had?"

Inuyasha slowly walked over with Kagome until he was face to face with the wolf prince. He could still smell the stench of blood and burnt flesh clinging to him.

"Threatening Shippo's life to keep Kagome quiet, you could tell your tribe any story you wanted. Probably something that would make you sound like a hero? Something about how you saved Kagome from the worthless half-breed?"

Koga snarled, then hung his head in defeat. He knew when he'd been beaten. "You win this round dogshit. But I'll get you for this one day."

Kagome wanted to smack him, but didn't feel right about attacking someone so injured. Instead she grabbed Inuyasha and kissed the surprised hanyou, right in front of the wolf. A deep, long kiss. Koga tried to walk forwards, intending to pull Inuyasha away from his woman, only to painfully fall to the ground.

"Koga, let me be clear about something." She said after pulling back from the kiss. "You **never** had a chance with me! I would rather be with that toad servant of Sesshomaru than you!" Her aura briefly flared red with anger, making the wolf crawl backwards. Ayame moved between him and Kagome, helping Koga up.

The wolf looked fearfully at the miko as their previous encounter flashed before his eyes. He swallowed, trying to act tough. "So, what now? Are you going to kill me? Cut my balls off like you threatened?"

Kagome looked to her friends, then shook her head as her red aura receded. "No, I think you've been punished enough by your own actions, and without your jewel shards you're no match for any of us." She walked past him, hand in hand with Inuyasha, pausing once she was on the threshold of Kaede's home. "You can stay until you've healed, then I want you gone."

"Kagome wait!" Koga called after her. She did not look back at him.

"Everything I did, everything I was going to do, was for love."

Kagome still refused to look at him. "You don't even know what that word means." Then she continued inside with Inuyasha.

...

SNAP!

"Stupid sticks!"

Kagome groaned as the arrow she had been making snapped in two. This was the fourth one! She had gone out with Kaede to make some, hoping the task would get her mind off of everything that had happened.

"Perhaps if you didn't push so hard on the heads?" The old miko offered carefully. The young girl glared at her, then sighed.

"Sorry. I'll try to do better." She picked up another unfinished arrow and went to work on it.

She couldn't believe Koga! She had thought she knew him! To think, she had defended that scumbag!

Kagome picked up an arrowhead and began to attach it to the shaft. She was angry with herself even more than with Koga. She had chosen not to see him for who he was. A smug, bigoted, entitled asshole who thought he deserved whatever he wanted the moment he wanted it.

Was she really so blind? Was flattery and flowers all it took for someone to pull the wool over her eyes?

She thought back to all of those times where she had sat Inuyasha when the two of them were fighting, only for Koga to laugh and put his foot on the hanyou's back like he'd beaten him and saying something about mutts knowing their place. She hadn't even considered how much it must have hurt Inuyasha to hear that and think she agreed.

SNAP!

"ARGH!"

Kagome threw down the broken arrow and ran her fingers through her hair. Nothing was going right this day!

She looked up at Kaede as the old woman placed a hand on her shoulder. "Perhaps we should take a break?" She offered. "I need to get back anyway. I promised to give Inuyasha more lessons in reading and writing."

Kagome blinked. "He still wants to learn?"

Kaede nodded. "At first I think he wanted to impress you. Now it's become something personal to him. He wants to prove that he isn't an animal."

The younger miko winced at that, then nodded. "He's no animal. Not anymore." She gathered the tools they had brought with them and stood. "I'll help. It's the least I can do for him."

...

Kagome and Kaede sat outside along with Inuyasha and Shippo (who Kagome had insisted needed to learn too), practicing writing. They used sticks that had one end burned to charcoal to write words on a plank of wood, allowing it to be erased with a wet cloth for the next word. Kagome made a mental note to get some small chalkboards and chalk the next time she went home.

After having Shippo write a little to see how far along he was Kagome guessed he was about the level of a first grader. He knew most of the characters and could recognize simple words, including his own name. "My father taught me!" The kitsune beamed at her before growing sad. "Before, you know..." Kagome picked him up and sat him on her lap, wrapping her arms around him. Even though he was technically still in trouble for stealing those cherries, she still wanted him to know he was loved.

Inuyasha's reading wasn't much better than Shippo's, but that was to be expected from someone who as she learned had been almost totally illiterate before his lessons with Kaede. He told her that his mother had tried too teach him, since no one else would, but he had been more interested in playing outside and chasing down small animals (and boy would she get mad when he left their blood on her sheets). Kagome smiled as he concentrated, trying to use the stick to copy her name underneath where she'd written it for him. His ears suddenly twitched before looking over his shoulder.

"Sis?"

Ginta and Hakkaku were watching them, their heads bent slightly to the side in a way that reminded Kagome of that 'confused dog' look Inuyasha gave when he didn't understand something. "What are you doing?" Hakkaku asked.

Kagome put her hand on Inuyasha's shoulder, letting him know it was okay. "We're teaching the boys to read and write."

The two wolves looked at each other. "What's that?" Ginta finally said.

"It's like talking, but harder and slower." Hakkaku grinned and nodded to himself. "You know, one of those things humans do to make things harder than it has to be, like cooking meat before eating it."

Kagome motioned to the ground. "Come sit with us. I'll show you."

...

Koga lay watching them from within Kaede's home, his vigil only interrupted by Ayame changing his bandages or bringing water to his lips or feeding him. He hated this. Not only had he been humiliated and hurt, he had been reduced to the state of an infant, needing someone to care for him.

"Looks like those two are having a good time." Ayame said as she tied off a bandage. Koga growled at that.

"Sure, why not? I've already lost everything else I cared about, why not them too?"

The wolf princess shook her head. "You haven't lost everything. You're hurt, not dead."

Koga rolled over onto his back. "Aren't I? Kagome is gone, my jewel shards are gone, and now my tribe is gone. You think I can stay alpha without those shards? With injuries like these?" He stretched out his arms, ignoring the pain and stiffness. "I'll be overthrow and cast out the first day I get back to the den."

He turned back to look outside, watching as Kagome made some marks on a piece of wood and had Ginta try to copy them. He didn't know what the purpose of the activity was, nor did he care.

"Do you really think your tribe is as savage as that? We are more than animals, we are youkai." Ayame told him. "And you can get better, Kaede said so. It will be hard, but you can do it."

Koga shut his single exposed eye. "What's the point? It would be best for the tribe if I never came back. Can't have a cripple leading them. I wish I'd died, I have no reason to live anyway..."

His eye snapped open as a loud clang ran out. Ayame stood before him, her hands tightly clenched.

"Do I count for anything to you? Do I matter at all?"

Her eyes shone with tears as she gritted her teeth. "I stood by you even as you broke your promise to marry me. I said nothing as you pursued Kagome, ignoring my own hurt and the mockery you were making of my tribe. I worried about you when you were gone. I took care of you when you were injured. Does none of that matter too you?"

"Ayame..." Koga tried to sit up, tried to reach for her.

"I ignored my father's warnings, my own good sense, because I thought I knew you. I thought that one day you'd give up this hopeless love for Kagome and finally see me, see how much I love you. But that's never going to happen is it? I might as well be a ghost for all you care." The wolf princess turned and walked around the room, gathering up her few furs she had brought.

"What happened to you isn't right and it isn't fair. But if you're just giving up on yourself then I'm done. The old woman can care for you now, but I'm done. If you don't care, then why should I?"

She strode past him, only to stop as she felt a bandaged hand at her ankle. Koga was looking up at her, a single tear in his visible eye.

"I'm sorry..." He whispered as he began to sob, finally breaking down. "Please, stay..."

Ayame looked out the door for a moment, then knelt, gathering the bandaged figure in her arms as he grabbed onto her with his one good hand.

"I'm sorry! So sorry!" He wailed, cuddling against her like a cub with it's mother. "Please forgive me!"

Ayame smiled softly, and gently stroked his hair.

"It'll all be okay Koga. I promise. I won't leave you, ever."


	15. Mercy

Chapter 15: Mercy

"And that is how you spell Hakkaku." Kagome said before handing the wolf the stick. Now that the two wolves had joined the lesson it was clear she and Kaede had a lot of work to do. "Now you try."

Hakkaku furrowed his brow in concentration, his movements clumsy as he tried to copy what Kagome had written. "Like this?"

"Very good." Kaede stood, patting him on the back. "I'll be back in a moment. I should check on Koga."

Kagome frowned at that. "He doesn't deserve any help." Inuyasha nodded in agreement, even as the two wolves looked away.

"I still can't believe Koga would stoop so low." Ginta shook his head.

Inuyasha huffed and crossed his arms. "You two should just ditch him."

"We can't do that." Hakkaku replied as he tried to copy his name on the wood plank. "You don't understand. Koga is our alpha. That means we have to support him no matter what. Even if we don't like what he does. Like dishonoring Ayame."

"Or beating on us when he's mad." Ginta added.

"Or pursuing a human as a mate." Hakkaku cringed after he realized what he had said. "Eh... no offense Sis."

Inuyasha stood up and glared at the wolf imposingly. "And what did you mean by that then? He should be so lucky someone like Kagome could ever want him."

"Inuyasha...he didn't mean anything by it." Kagome grabbed his sleeve blushed. "Please, let it go."

The hanyou looked to her, then to Hakkaku. "No, I want to know. What's so bad about Kagome that Koga shouldn't want her?

Ginta quickly came to the other wolf's rescue. "He...he kinda...promised his grandfather he wouldn't pursue human women after..." He hesitantly explained, rubbing the back of his head with one hand. "...after his father...kinda...well...did."

Hakkaku turned to glare at the other wolf. "We aren't supposed to talk about it!"

"Well it was either that or watch you get stomped like a bug!" Ginta shouted back. "You've seen what he can do!"

"Hold it." Inuyasha held up a hand. "Are you saying Koga's old man had a human mate?" He blinked as the implications hit him. "Are you saying Koga is a hanyou?"

Kagome's eyes widened in shock as Shippo stood up in her lap. "That...that can't be. He hates hanyous." He looked up at Kagome. "Doesn't he?"

The two wolves looked at each other. It was clear they weren't getting out of this.

"Well?" Inuyasha demanded, glaring at the two of them.

Ginta sighed, sitting down. "Okay, I'll tell you the whole story." He looked up at Inuyasha. "But if anyone finds out I'm telling them you tortured it out of me."

"Sure." Inuyasha nodded, leaning on the Tessaiga like a cane. He still wasn't entirely recovered from all of those wasp stings, which was why the group was spending the day in the village (despite his insistence he was fine).

Ginta hung his head, speaking quietly. "Koga's not a hanyou. But he had a hanyou half-sister."

"Had?" Kagome asked before quickly realizing Ginta's deliberate choice of words.

Ginta nodded. "Koga's mother was killed in a feud with a rival clan when he was young, about ten in human years. Koga's father was devastated."

"That's right." Hakkaku joined in. "It hit the whole clan hard. But for him...it was like the world had ended."

"He stopped eating, stopped sleeping, just spent all of his time at the clearing where she had been buried." Ginta continued. "One day he just...disappeared. Everyone thought he was dead. But Koga wouldn't accept that. He said he was going to find his father and took off on his own even though his grandfather, the alpha, had forbidden him.

Inuyasha's gaze softened almost imperceptibility. "What happened then?"

The two wolves looked at each other. "We...don't really know. But about a year later...they both came back. Along with a human woman and a hanyou baby girl. He said that the human was his mate now."

Inuyasha closed his eyes. This story was sounding uncomfortably familiar. "And then?"

Ginta swallowed. "Are...are you sure you won't get mad if I tell you?"

Inuyasha flinched when Kagome put her hand on his back, then relaxed. "Go on."

Ginta stared at the ground. "Koga's grandfather was furious. He said Koga's father had dishonored his clan and bloodline. Koga's father tried to protect them...but he couldn't. One night a group of males led by Koga's grandfather cornered them in their cave."

He looked over to Hakkaku. "Only Koga was allowed to live."

Inuyasha turned from them, fists clenched. Kagome quickly grabbed his hands as he struggled not to break down.

"Afterwards, Koga's grandfather made us leave the bodies out to rot. He made Koga renounce his father. Made him swear an oath that he would have no dealings with humans except as a predator."

"We all learned then that being around humans led to nothing but misery." Hakkaku said, looking to Kagome. "If Koga weren't alpha, there are wolves in the tribe who would have killed him for pursuing you."

Kagome looked up as Kaede came back out. "Sorry for keeping you. I'm afraid I can't continue the lessons today." She noticed the expressions they wore. "Did something happen?"

"Actually..." Inuyasha began.

"Nope." Kagome interrupted him. "Nothing important."

Kaede raised her single eyebrow, but decided not to pursue the matter. Once she was back inside, followed by Ginta and Hakkaku, Inuyasha turned to her.

"What do you mean nothing important?"

"It doesn't change anything." Kagome replied, hefting her backpack over her should by a single strap as Shippo hopped onto the opposite shoulder. "He's still to blame for what he did. What he was going to do."

Inuyasha looked at her. "Yeah...I guess you're right. But still..."

"No, no buts." Kagome cut him off. "If anything it makes what he did even worse."

The hanyou sighed as he put Tessaiga back at his side. He could tell she was in no mood to argue with him. "Alright, I'll drop it for now."

Together, they headed inside.

...

Kagome watched as Inuyasha and Koga fought. The wolf had come around again, knocking Inuyasha to the side and professing his love for her.

"You deserve better than some half-breed." He told her, holding her hands. "You're better than that mongrel."

She nodded and giggled. She loved the attention he gave her, and barely even noticed the hurt on Inuyasha's face before the two began to fight.

After a while she was getting bored, and decided to end it. Time to put a dog in his place.

"SIT BOY!"

Inuyasha crashed to the ground, hard. Kagome gasped, had the sits always been so violent? Before she could think any further Koga grinned at her, then stomped down hard on Inuyasha's back over and over again.

Kagome's hand flew to her mouth as she screamed in horror. "No!"

But it was too late. A sickening crack rang out as Inuyasha convulsed, then lay still with his limbs splayed out in an unnatural position.

"Inuyasha! Please no!" She ran to him, not even noticing as Koga faded away.

"Why?" Inuyasha whimpered, tears running down his cheeks and turning the dirt on his face to mud as blood ran from his mouth. "Why Kagome? Why did you do this?"

"Inuyasha!" Kagome knelt, reaching out to him. As her hand touched him it passed right through, as if she were nothing but smoke.

No no no no! This wasn't possible! She had to do something!

"Kagome...why did you abandon me?" The shattered figure whispered as his strength faded.

"I didn't abandon you! I'm here! Can't you see me? Can't you hear me?" She pleaded frantically. But he couldn't see or hear her.

"Kagome..." His voice was now almost too soft too hear. "I thought you...loved me..." He trailed off as his broken body was wracked by a coughing fit that expelled even more blood from his rapidly filling lungs.

Inuyasha was dying. Inuyasha was dying and it was all her fault. She sobbed at the realization.

"I do love you!" She was sobbing hysterically, trying desperately to touch him, to make him hear her, to make him see her. But there was nothing she could do. Inuyasha was dying and he thought she didn't care.

It wasn't worth it. It had never been worth protecting Koga at Inuyasha's expense. She could have stopped this, could have told Koga she didn't want him. But she didn't.

She let this happen. She **made** this happen.

Inuyasha coughed again even harder, blood covering his chest, before his eyes rolled back in his head as his lungs finally gave up.

Kagome threw her head back and screamed her anguish to the sky as she knelt before Inuyasha's lifeless body.

"NOOOOOOOOO!"

...

Inuyasha shot awake, grabbing his sword and looking around for danger. It only took him a moment to see what had awoken him.

Across the room, Ayame and Kaede were changing Koga's bandages as Miroku and Sango held him down. He didn't see Shippo or the other two wolves, and figured they must have taken the boy out to keep him from watching.

"Please try to hold still." Kaede said gently as she cleaned out a wound on his back where she had been forced to burn away the thorny vines growing from him. Inuyasha had seen plenty of wounds in his life, having caused and received many. But even he was shocked at how bad the wolf looked underneath the bandages. As Koga screamed again through the leather they had him bite on Inuyasha couldn't help but cringe.

Beside him Kagome suddenly awoke. "No!" She stared wide-eyed, then grabbed onto Inuyasha. She had insisted on sleeping close to him. Inuyasha still sometimes had nightmares about his kidnapping, and she said she wanted to be with him in case they happened again. But Inuyasha had been embarrassed. Sleeping in Kagome's bed with her in her time where no one else knew about it was one thing, cuddling with her in front of his friends and the four wolves was quite another.

He had tried to reassure her he was fine, and it wasn't entirely a lie. Inuyasha really thought he was getting better. Defeating the slaver who kidnapped him even when the man had been powered by the nearly complete shikon jewel had done a lot to restore his self-confidence. But in the end he had given in to her because truth be told he enjoyed the close contact as much as she did. Besides, he figured it was probably just as much to help her deal with her own issues, to be able to quickly check that he was still there and hadn't been taken away again. And judging by her rapid pulse and breath, she was the one needing comfort at the moment.

"You okay?"

Kagome took a breath and let it out. "I'm fine." Another scream brought their attention back to Koga. Ayame was holding his hands, trying her best to help him through the pain.

"He's really hurting." Inuyasha said quietly. At that Kagome got a strange look, one that it took him a few moments to recognize because he saw it from her so rarely. In fact he could only really recall seeing it once on her face, when she had nearly destroyed Naraku.

It was contempt.

She turned from Koga and took Inuyasha's hand. "Let's go. I can't even stand to look at him."

Inuyasha allowed himself to be led, but at the doorway, for just a moment, he looked back at the suffering wolf prince.

They spent the rest of the night outside, Kagome in her sleeping bag, cuddled up against Inuyasha sitting cross-legged against a tree.

...

Koga lay panting as the last of the fresh bandages were wound around his injuries. He could barely move, it hurt so bad.

"Alright, I think we got it all this time." The old woman said, putting away something he had heard Kagome call a "first aid kit" before moving to wash her hands.

"You're very lucky we caught that tissue infection in time."

"Yeah...lucky me..." Koga snorted before a look from Ayame shut him down. "Sorry." He reached out to the wolf princess. Understanding, she helped him sit up. He watched as the other two humans took their leave, leaving him with Ayame and the old woman. She grabbed a bowl and poured some of the soup she had sitting on her fire into it, then got some water as Ayame moved him to sit in her lap.

"You need to eat." She told him. "You won't heal without food."

Koga glared at the soup with his single uncovered eye, then nodded that he understood. "Can I ask you something Miko...uh...?"

"Kaede." The old miko replied before holding the bowl to his lips. "It's just Kaede."

The wolf drank some of the soup, then looked at her again. "Why are you helping me?"

Kaede smiled slightly. "What a strange question. You are someone who is very hurt, and I have the ability to ease your suffering. Why wouldn't I help you?"

Koga looked over his shoulder at Ayame, then back at her. "I'm a youkai."

"Yes, I know." Kaede replied before lifting the bowl to his lips again. "So is Shippo. And Inuyasha is a hanyou."

Koga drank again before continuing. "But...but I've killed your kind. I've killed humans."

The old miko sighed, then looked up at him. "I know. Inuyasha told me about that village." She offered him some water, which he eagerly accepted.

"It's not that I'm not grateful...I just don't understand why you'd do this for me." He said after drinking.

Kaede motioned Ayame to lay him further back so he could get more soup in his mouth without it spilling.

"It's called mercy." She explained. "It means I decide not to hold your actions against you, and let the past be the past. It means I'm placing faith in you that you can change your ways."

Ayame crossed her arms around Koga's chest. "Please listen to her."

Kaede offered him more soup. "Haven't you ever been shown mercy before?"

Koga looked away. "I don't want to talk about it. And anyway, what makes you so sure I won't go right back to what I was doing once I'm healed?"

Kaede shook her head. "I can't be sure. Like I said, mercy is an act of faith. You could betray that faith. But if I didn't extend you mercy, if I didn't help you when it were in my power to do so, if I held your crimes against you and refused to forgive you, you likely wouldn't even consider changing your ways."

She helped him finish up the last of the soup, then scooped out some more. "Now that's enough talk. Concentrate on eating."


	16. Do Better

Chapter 16: Do Better

"Come on, we won't hurt you..."

The tiny, ragged figure ran through the dark forest, desperate to stay ahead of the youkai pursuing him. He frantically looked around for somewhere to hide, spying a hollow long and crawling into it. At the sound of approaching footsteps he held his breath and tried to will his heart to slow, even as it felt like it would burst from his thin chest.

"Where did he go?"

"He's close, I can smell him."

"I say we eat him feet first."

The boy held his side in pain, and cringed when he lifted his hand to his face and saw blood. He shut his eyes tight, ears straining as he prayed he would hear footsteps going away from him.

'Please...please just go...'

"There you are you little shit!"

A clawed hand reached into the front of the log. Panicking, the boy crawled out the other end and made a run for it.

He had to keep going. He couldn't stop. He was so tired, and the wound in his side hurt. But still he had to run. He knew that his life and his tribe's future depended on it.

"This way!" A voice growled from behind him. The boy stopped as he suddenly found himself in front of a river. He looked back at his pursuers and, realizing he had no choice, jumped in. As he struggled to stay afloat he caught a glimpse of his pursuers, and for a moment was thankful that they weren't diving in after him. Then the water went over his head, and all was darkness.

...

"NO!"

Kagome sat up with a jolt, nearly knocking Inuyasha over.

"What?!" He whirled his head around, is keen ears and nose detecting nothing out of the ordinary. Just the normal sounds and smells of morning. "What is it?"

Kagome shook her head to clear away the nightmare. "Sorry...just a bad dream." She stood up out of her sleeping bag and groaned as she saw that it had snowed and her sleeping bag was soaked. She picked it off of the ground with a sigh. "We should head back to Kaede, it's almost morning anyway."

Inuyasha gave her a funny look as she started back towards the village. He wasn't very good at dealing with his own emotions, let alone other people's, he knew that (though he thought he was getting a little bit better at it). But he had decided that he would no longer run away from his problems, not after avoiding Kagome for the week he was in her time had made her so upset (it hadn't been easy on him ether).

"That's two in one night." He finally said, deciding to start with something slow, just a statement of fact. When Kagome kept walking he jumped in front of her.

"What were they about?"

Kagome looked away from him. "Nothing." she replied after a moment. She hoped Inuyasha would just let it go. And though she hated herself for thinking it, she had to admit that things had been easier when she could just sit him to win any argument or avoid any unpleasant conversations. "Please, don't worry about me."

"Yeah, that ain't happening." Inuyasha put his hands behind his head as he walked with her. "Look, didn't you say you want me to be honest about how I'm feeling with you?"

Kagome blinked at that. It was true, she had told him that a few nights ago, when she had removed the beads. "Yes, I did."

Inuyasha held out a hand to stop her from going further. "Well doesn't that apply to you with me? Shouldn't you be honest too?"

Kagome paused. He did have a point.

"Alright, I dreamed about...Koga." She spat the name like it was a curse.

Inuyasha hadn't expected to hear that. He tried to force his temper down, to not say anything he might regret. Kimiko had suggested he try counting to ten when he was angry, to avoid getting into trouble. He hadn't thought much of the idea, but now...

"One...two...three..."

Kagome looked at him like he were growing another head. "What are you doing?"

"Five...counting...six..." He replied. "Your mom said to do it when I'm mad...seven..."

Kagome giggled and rubbed one of his ears. "No no no, you're suppose to count in your head, not out loud."

Inuyasha blinked, his cheeks flushing as she rubbed his ear. "She didn't say that part."

Kagome took his hand and began to walk with him as the sun peeked over the horizon. She did this often now, holding his hand, hugging him, kissing him, or rubbing his ears. For so long touch had meant only pain for Inuyasha, and she wanted to change that. "Why were you mad?"

"You were dreaming about the wolf." He said, jealousy clear in his voice. The girl next to him tightened her grip on his hand in response.

"What? Oh...not like THAT!" Kagome stammered, blushing. "I meant...well..." She looked into Inuyasha's golden eyes. "In my dreams, he killed you."

'Because I helped him do it.' She silently added.

Inuyasha raised an eyebrow at that. "Heh, like that wolf would even have a chance without his jewel shards, me always holding back, and you using the beads to leave me open to his attacks. Don't worry about me."

Kagome pulled her hand from his, scowling. She knew she should let it go. Inuyasha was only telling the truth after all. Still, her own regrets about the beads were just too raw.

"Kagome?" Inuyasha cringed, conditioned to expect a sit when she got that look. But after a few moments when none came he remembered the beads were gone and relaxed. "What is it?"

The young miko tried to walk past him. "It's nothing. Get out of my way."

Inuyasha rolled his eyes, then picked her up and slung her over his shoulder.

"Hey! What are you doing? Put me down!" Kagome ordered she pounded on his back. Inuyasha ignored her before jumping up on a high tree branch, then sitting her next to him. Kagome gasped and grabbed onto him.

"You're not going anywhere until we talk." Inuyasha told her. "We aren't doing the 'Kagome goes off and sulks by herself' thing anymore. I can stay in a tree all day, so you might as well tell me what's bothering you now." He crossed his arms. "Well?"

Kagome glared at him, but as the minutes ticked by and she couldn't find a position where the rough bark she was sitting on wasn't digging into her ass it became clear he was perfectly willing to stay in the tree with her all day if he had too.

"Ready to talk?" He asked her again.

Kagome sighed, then closed her eyes and nodded. "Okay. But first can we please get down?"

Inuyasha picked her up, jumping down to the forest floor. Despite herself, Kagome couldn't help but admire the strength and power he possessed.

"When you mentioned me sitting you in those fights, well..." Kagome began, looked at the ground after Inuyasha let her go. "That's what my dreams were about. I'd sit you, and then he'd kill you." Tears filled her eyes. "I'm sorry."

Inuyasha wasn't sure what to make of that. Hadn't he already told her he didn't hold a grudge over the beads anymore? Why was she still hung-up on that?

"I already said not to worry about it." He tried again. "I'm not dead am I? So why are you still upset?"

Kagome's tears ran down her cheeks as she stroked one of Inuyasha's. "I humiliated and hurt you, for his sake. Every time I sat you to save him, I never even considered how it made you feel."

The hanyou gave her a questioning look. He thought for a few seconds, then realized this was another one of those 'I've gotta tell her the truth even if it hurts' moments.

"Kagome, I want you to listen." He grabbed her by her upper arms, a position she had come to recognize as his 'I'm telling you my feelings' pose.

"Yeah, it did make me feel bad. Mostly it made me feel like you were a bitch, but I always got over it. Only once did it really hurt me. Really make me wonder if I should stay with you."

Kagome nodded that she understood, then gently pulled her arms from his grip and grabbed his hands. "Go ahead, tell me. I want to know."

Inuyasha softly squeezed her hands. "It was the first time, after I'd killed the birds of paradise. I couldn't understand why you protected Koga, and thought it was because he was a full youkai and I'm just a hanyou. I thought that you preferred a youkai who ordered a massacre of a human village and kidnapped you and Shippo over some worthless half-breed. And yeah, that hurt."

Kagome hung her head in shame. "I'm sorry." She felt her eyes fill with tears again. "You deserved so much better."

Inuyasha sighed. "But that's only part of the story." He held her chin up with one hand. "That night I thought about going to see Kikyo. To ask her to take me to hell."

He held Kagome even as the shock raced through her. She had no idea. She could have lost Inuyasha way back then and she might never have known. How long before she would have headed back through the well to get him? Days? Weeks? Even longer? How long would she have searched for him, never knowing what had happened to him?

"But I didn't." He reminded her. "I decided to stay. Because even though I was mad, I knew that the fight before you left was partially my fault too."

Kagome squeezed him tightly. Inuyasha leaned in, kissing her lips. "Remember that I'm the one who started the fight. I didn't trust you enough to believe you when you said nothing had happened between you and him, and I lashed out. I should have known better. Do you forgive me?"

She kissed him back. "Yes, yes of course I do."

He stroked her long black hair softly. "Then I forgive you too. We should both work to do better from now on." He offered his hand, silently thanking Kimiko in his head for all of her advice on talking things out.

Kagome eagerly took his hand. Even though it was hard sometimes, she was determined to keep going. To keep being honest with Inuyasha, and to accept when he was honest with her. She had almost lost him once because neither felt they could talk to the other, letting a stupid fight get out of hand, and she was determined never to repeat that mistake.

...

Koga sat in Kaede's home, eating the soup he had been provided. Kaede insisted he was too weak for anything else. He hoped the old miko would get back soon. She had said that today, if he was feeling up to it, he could try walking on his own. Truth be told he was getting restless. While the pain of his injuries was bad, the lack of freedom was worse. To a youkai who had once run wild through the forests being confined was hell. Unfortunately for him Ayame had made him promise not too unless she was there, worried he'd fall and injure himself further.

"So, doing any better?"

Koga looked up, surprised to see Inuyasha standing in the doorway. He was holding something in his hand, something that smelled like heaven.

"What's it to you mutt..." He paused, remembering how vulnerable he was.

Inuyasha shook his head. "I thought you might be getting tired of Kaede's cooking." He set the object next to Koga. "It's ramen. Try it, it's good."

The wolf tried to pretend he didn't want it, but his nose was clearly interested. After a few moments he grabbed the two sticks with his left hand and began to eat. "Woah! No wonder you wanted to hold onto Kagome so badly!"

Inuyasha sat next to him. He judged that he had at least a few minutes before Kaede returned with Ayame. No way in hell could he do this in front of anyone else. He had a reputation to protect.

"So, how badly are you injured?" He finally asked.

Koga stopped eating for a moment. "They won't let me see a mirror, but I think the scars are going to be bad. Worse is my right hand. I can't even make a fist." He waved the hand, the fingers curled in almost like a claw. He finished up the ramen and looked back at the hanyou. "Why are you here? You won. Kagome is yours."

Inuyasha stretched. "Because I want to know a few things." He said. "And I need you to do something, for Kagome's sake."

Koga drank the liquid left over in the cup. "I would have thought you would be enjoying this."

Inuyasha shrugged. "Watching Kagome take you down a peg is one thing. Seeing you like this is another. Plus, the final battle with Naraku is getting closer. I can't have this issue hanging over all of our heads while we're trying to fight."

He leaned in. "I want you to apologize to Kagome for everything you did."

The wolf blinked, then broke into laughter.

"Good one! Apologize for what? For wanting to be stronger?"

Inuyasha growled low, but kept himself under control. This was going to be a long day...

Suddenly his ears picked up footsteps. A crowd. They were running towards Kaede's home.

Without even seeing him Kagome and Kaede raced through the door, Sango and Miroku followed close behind. In the slayer's arms was a small boy.

"What's going on?" Inuyasha demanded. Kagome just shook her head and pointed to the corner where her backpack lay. Understanding, Inuyasha got out the first aid kit and handed it to her, then stood nearby in case he was needed. He knew to leave the medicine up to her.

He watched as Kagome and Kaede removed the boy's clothes. Up close he could see that the boy was a youkai, a wolf youkai at that. He had a nasty wound in his side that looked like it had been torn open repeatedly. Inuyasha shuddered as he realized that meant the boy had most likely been chased and couldn't stop to tend his wound, just letting it open up over and over again. The same thing had happened to him more times than he wanted to remember as a boy. Besides that the little wolf was dirty and thin. He had obviously been on his own for a while.

"Please, we're trying to help you." Kagome pleaded with the cub. He growled in response and tried to bite her.

"Let me go human! I have to find my alpha!"

Koga sat up at that, then slowly stood.

"Kichiro?"

The boy sat up, pushing against Kagome.

"Uncle Koga?"


	17. Just Like You

Chapter 17: Just Like You

Inuyasha watched as Kagome cleaned the little wolf's wound. When Koga tried to get closer he stuck his arm out to bar him.

"She knows what she's doing." He told the wolf prince. Koga reluctantly had to agree. "So, you're his uncle?"

"Yeah, he's my sister's kid." Inuyasha gave him a strange look at the word 'sister'. "What? Are you surprised that I have a sister?"

Inuyasha shrugged. He decided not to tell the wolf prince he knew of his hanyou half-sister just yet. No sense in starting a fight while Kagome was trying to save the cub.

Ayame walked in the door and Inuyasha was already up before she could take another step. "Kichiro?"

"Stay back." Inuyasha guided her to sit next to Koga, then stood over the two wolves. "Let her work." Without realizing it the two of them held hands as they watched Kagome and Kaede work on the little wolf.

'Heh, maybe there is something between them after all.' Inuyasha thought to himself.

...

Later Inuyasha, Miroku, and Sango sat outside of Kaede's home, the old miko and Kagome watching over both Koga and the little wolf along with Ayame. The three of them looked up as Kagome walked out the door, her backpack slung over her shoulder.

"How is he?" Sango asked, Kirara sleeping on her lap.

"He's resting now." Kagome told her before looking around. "Where's Shippo?"

Inuyasha snorted as he leaned back and put his hands behind his head. "Off somewhere with Koga's two idiot friends."

Kagome made a mental note to give the two of them a talking too about not helping Shippo get out of his grounding. But that could wait. Right now she had a more important issue.

"Inuyasha, I want to stay here for another day. I know you want to find the rest of the jewel shards, but I'm worried about Kichiro and want to make sure he's okay."

It had always been a battle to get Inuyasha to let the group stay anywhere. The hanyou was very impatient and had little sympathy for the limits of his companion's merely human bodies. If it were up to him they'd never stop looking for jewel shards. Before she had used the beads to win those battles, but now that she had freed him she would have to convince him to stay. "Please Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha sat up as Kagome braced herself for his response. She didn't want to have a fight with him now, she was already emotionally exhausted from saving the little wolf.

"Alright, but just one day. Those jewel shards won't find themselves."

"I just think...wait, really?" Kagome stared at him.

"You owe me three cups of ramen though." Inuyasha said. "And...I GUESS we can take a break seeing as how we have most of the jewel now." He added before crossing his arms, clearly putting on a show.

Kagome smiled as she reached into her shirt, removing the nearly complete jewel hanging on a string. She held it in her palm, looking at her reflection in it. It was strange to think that their journey was so much closer to completion. Just a few days ago Naraku had held all of the advantages, and now he was on the run.

"Kagome?"

Kagome looked up at Inuyasha. "Oh, sorry. What were you saying?"

"I said we might as well head to your place and pick up some more stuff if we're staying here." The hanyou offered his hand. Kagome nodded, taking it and using it to climb onto his back. As Sango and Miroku watched them go the monk leaned close to the slayer.

"Does he really think he's fooling us?"

Sango shrugged, pulling Miroku close. "He's still new at this whole thing. I think he worries we'll think he's weak if he lets on his feeling for Kagome."

The monk left a trail of kisses up her neck. "So, we should pretend we don't notice?"

Sango moaned, wrapping her arms around him. "He'll tell us when he's ready."

...

"...and get some more bandages for the wolf kid." Inuyasha called up to Kagome as he raided her family's kitchen. Everyone was out, so they had the whole house to themselves.

Kagome put a few extra boxes of bandages in her backpack, along with some more clothes, before heading down the stairs. "You're worried about him, aren't you?"

'Do you see something of your past in him?'

Inuyasha paused, a grilled chicken breast in his hand. "Heh, just because his uncle is an ass doesn't mean he should suffer."

Kagome pulled up a chair next to him. "No, I think it's more than that. I've seen you playing with the village children. They all like you. You're good with kids."

Inuyasha looked at the chicken, then put it down on a plate and got out some utensils just like Kimiko had taught him. "There's more to it than that. This morning I was talking to Miroku about karma. I've done a lot of things I'm...not proud of. So I figure I should do something good now and then to balance the scales a little."

Kagome blinked at that. "Why would you think that? You've done a lot of good. You've saved our lives more times than I can count. You've saved so many other people. How could you see yourself as having bad karma?"

The hanyou sighed, his shoulders slumping. For a moment Kagome worried she had overstepped her bounds. Inuyasha's past was a sore topic with him. Almost all of it brought back bad memories.

"Before I met you, I only did one good thing. One. In all of my years of fighting, stealing, and killing to survive I did only one solitary unselfish thing."

Kagome slowly placed her hand on his shoulder, her voice calm and soothing. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Inuyasha was silent for a moment, then began to speak.

...

_Inuyasha looked at the scene of carnage before him. Bodies lay where they had been cut down, the scavenging birds eating their fill. The scent of decay filled the air, mixing with the smoke from the smoldering remains of a cart._

_Maybe bandits had spotted an easy mark in the group of peasants fleeing in a hopeless bid to escape the endless warfare. Maybe some lord's soldiers had gotten bored. Not much difference either way. And anyway it wasn't his problem._

_Humanity could wipe itself out for all he cared._

_He was just about to leave when he heard a weak cry. His sharp ears told him it came from one of the bodies. A woman, young and once quite pretty._

_Curious, he knelt and turned the corpse onto it's back. A tiny bundle was clutched in her stiff arms. He saw movement as he pulled the blanket aside._

_A baby. Alive._

_Inuyasha stared at the wailing infant before standing._

_"Not my problem." He repeated. "It's not my problem."_

_He knew he should just go. It was none of his business and he was pretty certain none of them would do the same for him._

_But what would Mother think?_

_With a sigh, he knelt and scooped the baby up in his arms. The infant's wailing became slightly softer. Inuyasha sniffed, then removed the soiled blanket completely. The little...girl he saw, seemed to be otherwise alright._

_Inuyasha cradled her in his arms, carrying her from the site of the massacre. For a second he entertained the idea of keeping her. He wouldn't be alone anymore. He'd have someone who accepted him._

_He shook his head, laughing at the stupid idea. No one could ever want or accept him. Besides that, what the hell did he know about caring for a baby? And there was the question of milk._

_"Come on, there's a village not too far from here. Maybe someone there will take you." The baby giggled and pulled on one of his ears._

_It had been many years since Inuyasha had entered a village, and then only at night when his appearance wasn't so obvious. When he was younger he would steal anything he could get his claws on, but after being chased out by a torch-bearing, stone-throwing mob one time too many he had decided hunting in the wild simply less of a hassle._

_Now though, he had little to fear from the frightened villagers. Those who didn't swiftly get out of his way were shoved aside. One foolish man took a swing at him and ended up face down in the dirt for his trouble. Inuyasha then lifted the man up by his neck with one hand as if her were light as a feather._

_"Who's in charge here?" He demanded._

_"The-the headman." The man weakly replied, both hands struggling at the hanyou's wrist but unable to break his iron grip._

_"Go get him. Now." He released his grip and let the man fall on his ass, before shooting him a glare that had him scurrying to obey._

_Inuyasha looked over at a chair and walked over to it, hardly noticing as the people around him moved aside. He half expected a stone or two to fly his way, but it seemed his show of force had gotten the message across that he wasn't playing around._

_He carefully sat the naked baby in his lap, and despite himself he smiled a little as she cuddled against him._

_"Heh, don't get too attached kid. I can't keep you." He looked up, choosing a woman who was holding a small child in the crowd."You, get over here."_

_The woman stared at him, then placed her child in the arms of an older woman Inuyasha assumed was her own mother and slowly approached him. "Do whatever you wish to me, just spare my child."_

_Inuyasha rolled his eyes. "I want you to take a look at this kid. Since you're a mother maybe you'll see something I don't." He handed the startled woman the baby. "Well?"_

_The woman looked at him for a second, then began to check the baby girl over. "Well, I'd say she's about six months old. She looks okay, but where did she come from?" The woman paused. "Is she yours?"_

_"No." Inuyasha replied. "There was a massacre, bandits I think. She was the only survivor." A commotion ahead of him got his attention. The man he had sent to find the headman was returning, along with an old man with a white beard. Inuyasha rolled his eyes again when he saw that the old man was carrying a ratty-looking sutra._

_"Away youkai! Leave our village in peace!" The old man shouted as he waved the sutra in the annoyed-looking hanyou's face._

_"Look, I just want someone to take care of this kid. I'm not here to cause any trouble." Inuyasha stood up from the chair._

_The woman held the baby to her, undoing the front of her yukata and starting to nurse the hungry little girl._

_"Keiko, are you...?" The headman asked._

_"This child is human, Grandfather." The woman, Keiko, said as she nursed her. "This...hanyou?...has brought her to me after her parents were killed by bandits."_

_Inuyasha watched her for a moment, then slowly approached. "Are you going to care for this child? Will she be loved?" He whispered._

_Keiko nodded. "Yes, I promise. Though I wish you hadn't made such a scene."_

_Inuyasha smiled just a little, then turned to the crowd. "Listen up! Keiko and her family are under my protection! Anyone messes with them, I'll know! You won't see me, but I'll be watching!"_

...

"I stayed around the village outskirts for a while, and once I was sure they weren't just going to throw her out I left."

Kagome's eyes were misty as he finished. She stroked one of his ears gently. "Do you know what ever happened to them?"

Inuyasha's eyes closed as she stroked his sensitive ear. "Not a clue. It's been over fifty years now. Keiko is certainly dead. The baby might even be dead." He shrugged. "Anyway, before I met you that was the single good act I did. Pretty pathetic huh?"

Kagome leaned forwards, hugging him. "Well I think it was a great thing. After the way humans have treated you, you showed a lot of compassion and courage. For all you knew that village could have had a powerful miko or monk nearby who would have tried to kill you."

Inuyasha blushed. "That actually didn't occurred to me until a while after..."

...

Back in the feudal era Koga sat with Ayame, holding vigil over the unconscious Kichiro.

"Something is wrong with my clan. I can feel it." Koga said as he stroked the little wolf's hair.

"Maybe he just missed you?" Ayame offered, though even as she said it she realized how ridiculous it sounded.

Koga shook his head at that. "No, he knows not to be off on his own. If he's here, that can only mean trouble." He sighed to himself, looking at his mangled right hand. "Is this karma? I should never have left my clan. I haven't been a very good alpha, have I?"

The wolf princess placed a hand on his shoulder, but didn't argue the point.

"The only time I fought for my clan was when I was tricked into thinking Inuyasha had slaughtered them. And that never would have happened had I not pursued Kagome. I guess, maybe she reminded of...never mind..."

"Your father's human mate?" Ayame guessed.

Koga pushed himself up, managing to stand on his own. "Who told you?" He demanded.

Ayame stood up next to him. "Inuyasha. He said you two were more alike than you know. He lost his family when he was young as well."

Koga looked away from her. He had never really thought of the hanyou's past. Inuyasha was an obstacle, something to be removed so he could get what he wanted. That he had existed before Koga had met him wasn't something he had considered.

"Do you know where he was when he was missing?" Ayame turned Koga around to face her. "He was kidnapped by slave traders. They starved and tortured him. He very nearly broke. If not for his friends finding him when they did he would be some human lord's pet by now."

The wolf prince lowered his eyes. "I...I see." He sat next to Kichiro. 'And yet he's shown concern for me? Me of all people? Have I really been so wrong about him all this time?'

Ayame sat back down next to him, resting her head on his shoulder.

"I always thought that just being the most powerful made a wolf alpha." Koga shook his head. "Maybe I should have listened to the elders more. Learned what they tried to teach me. That way I would at least have wisdom to fall back on now."

"I think you've already learned a lot from this." Ayame closed her eyes. "And someday you will be able to lead your pack with power and wisdom."

Koga gently kissed the top of her head. "I hope you're right."

...

Inuyasha jumped out of the well, Kagome on his back. Instantly he smelled trouble.

"Alright you three, get out here."

Shippo slowly approached, followed by Ginta and Hakkaku. Inuyasha crossed his arms, Kagome doing the same.

"Shippo, you are grounded young man." Kagome scolded the kitsune. "That means no going outside unless an adult says otherwise."

"They're adults." Shippo replied, giving her a feeble smile as he gestured towards the two wolves. "I mean...technically."

"He's got a point." Inuyasha shrugged. Kagome rolled her eyes and picked Shippo up, holding him facing backwards with one of her arms around his waist.

"You're going back to Kaede's." She told Shippo. "And as for you two," she pointed at the wolves. "Ayame will be hearing of this."

Both wolves gulped at that. "Y...yes Sis." Ginta said, hanging his head.

"We're sorry." Hakkaku added. The wolves began to walk back towards the village with them.

"Kagome, do I really gotta stay grounded for a whole three more days?" Shippo asked as he watched the ground go by beneath him.

"Four more days." Kagome corrected him. "You're getting an extra day. I warned you about going out."

" **Four** days?" Shippo struggled in her grip. "That's not fair!"

"Don't complain. You're getting off easy." Inuyasha told the kitsune, grinning a little. "If Kagome were my mother, you'd be over her knee right now." He looked to the two wolves. "And probably both of you too."

Both wolves cringed, clearly no strangers to that particular form of discipline as boys.

"Shippo, I'm not doing this because I like it." Kagome held him up so he was at eye level with her. "I want you to grow up right. That means I have to punish you when you are bad. So you learn right from wrong. I don't want you to end up like those youkai we fight, or even Naraku."

"Listen to her Shippo." Inuyasha added. "She knows what she's talking about. And anyway, didn't you say you were gonna take your punishment like a man? Or don't you want that sword?"

"I do! I do want it!"

Inuyasha took the kitsune from Kagome, placing him on his shoulders. "Someday you'll be on your own. Are you gonna protect people like Kagome? Or are you gonna be bad like Naraku or Sesshomaru?"

"I'm gonna protect people!" Shippo said proudly. "Just like Kagome, and just like you."

 


	18. Forgiveness

Chapter 18: Forgiveness

Kichiro groaned, holding up a hand to shield his eyes from the light. Why was everything so bright? And what were all of those strange smells?

Slowly his eyes got used to the light and he could open them to take a look around. He didn't recognize anything.

'Where am I?'

He slowly stood, grasping his side in pain. Looking down he saw two things: one, there were bandages around his waist and two, his clothes were missing.

The little wolf sniffed the air, trying to find something familiar even as he wracked his brain trying to remember how he got here, wherever here was.

'That's right! I was trying to find Uncle Koga! I've gotta warn him!'

"Kichiro?"

The wolf boy turned his head at his name, ears perking up. He was just about to make a run for it when he recognized the scents.

"Uncle Koga!" The boy ran to the bandaged figure, nearly knocking him over. Koga knelt and hugged the boy, Ayame doing the same.

"I'm so happy you're alright..." Koga said softly before pulling the boy from him. Kichiro just then seemed to notice Koga's bandages.

"Uncle Koga, you're hurt!" The little wolf bit his lip, grasping Koga's hand.

Koga sighed. "Yeah, I know. It's a long story." He placed his hands on the boy's shoulders. "What are you doing here? Why aren't you with the pack?"

...

Inuyasha and Kagome were just entering the village along with Shippo and the two wolves when Inuyasha suddenly paused, sniffing the air.

"More wolves?" He looked to Ginta and Hakkaku. "Is your whole damn pack planning to move in?"

The two wolves looked at each other, shrugging their shoulders. "Don't look at us. We're just here until Koga is well."

"Maybe they're looking for Kichiro?" Kagome suggested. Inuyasha paused, then ran ahead to the village, ignoring Kagome calling after him. He had a bad feeling...

When he arrived he saw three male wolves. One of them had a small boy and was holding him by the neck as the other two growled at the humans around them.

"I'll ask again." The wolf with the boy demanded. "Where is he? One of you humans has to have seen him. A wolf youkai child can't be that common a sight for you."

"Just snap his neck already!" One of the other wolves demanded. "They'll talk once they know we mean business!"

The wolf with the boy grinned. "Guess it just isn't your lucky day, huh kid?"

A red blur suddenly slammed into him, knocking the wolf to the ground. Inuyasha grabbed the boy in mid-air, setting him down gently.

The other two wolves growled, circling around him. "This is no concern of yours half-breed!" One of them snarled as the third wolf got back to his feet. The three of them lept upon him as one, but Inuyasha was far faster. In moments he had all three on the ground.  
"Inuyasha!"

The hanyou looked up to see Kagome running towards him along with Shippo and the other two wolves. One of the wolves on the ground tried to stand, only to feel Inuyasha's foot on his back. Inuyasha considered just killing the three wolves, but figured Kagome wouldn't like that.

"They were threatening a kid." He told Kagome as she ran up. She set her backpack down and removed some of the warded ropes they had used to tie up Inuyasha when his youkai side had taken control. As she tied the first wolf's hands behind his back he struggled, before he felt something sharp and metal on the back of his neck.

"Hold still if you want to keep your head." Inuyasha warned the wolf, holding the Tessiaga. Soon Kagome had all three of them tied up.

"Alright everybody, show's over!" Inuyasha shouted to the crowd. As the villagers left he grabbed one of the wolves by his hair and hauled him up. "What are you doing here?" He demanded.

The wolf spat at him. "Get your hands off of me half-breed!" Inuyasha glared at that, then obligingly let the wolf fall on his face.

"These wolves are from our pack." Ginta said. "What are you doing here? Koga has forbidden us to raid human villages anymore."

"Koga is no longer alpha!" Another of the wolves shouted. "He is outcast, along with you and his nephew! The new alpha has marked all of you for death!"

Hakkaku growled at that, and was just about to teach this whelp some manners, before he saw Koga approaching with Kichiro and Ayame.

"Koga?"

"Bring them." The wolf prince said simply. "Kagome, Inuyasha (the hanyou's ears perked at actually being referred to by name by him), I need to speak with you."

...

The three bound wolves sat in a corner, watched over by the newly returned Miroku and Sango. Kaede had made everyone some stew after returning from gathering herbs, and after giving everyone a bowl she sat with Inuyasha and Kagome, with Shippo in Kagome's lap. Across from them Koga sat, Ayame at one side, Kichiro at the other, and Ginta and Hakkaku behind them. Kichiro sniffed at the stew, then began to eat greedily. It was obvious he hadn't eaten in a while.

"I suppose I should start with some background." Koga began, looking at the two across from him. "My Grandfather was alpha of my pack for many years. He defeated all challengers to his authority, until the day I found those jewel shards. I bested him, and he grudgingly agreed to support me as alpha. Now he has a jewel shard of his own, and has seized power once again. He has killed or driven off any who support me, and has marked me for death along with Ginta, Hakkaku, and Ayame."

"Is it because you pursued Kagome?" Inuyasha asked, earning him an angry look from her.

Koga sighed. "Probably. He wasn't shy about letting me know he didn't approved." He looked to Ginta and Hakkaku, slightly annoyed. "And I know these two have already told you about my father."

"And your human step mother and hanyou half-sister." Inuyasha added. Kichiro blinked at that, but a look from Ayame told him to hold his questions.

"He's planning to ambush me once I returned to the den. Kichiro risked his life to warn me." He ruffled the boy's hair affectionately, then scowled and glared at the three bound wolves. "They were sent to kill him. They almost did before you found him."

Inuyasha looked upon the bandaged wolf, not sure what to say. Family feuds were the worst, he of all people should know that. "So, what are you going to do?"

Koga finished up his soup, then stood. "I have to reclaim my place as alpha. It's the only way we can return to our pack."

"You are in no condition to fight." Kaede shook her head. "You will surely be killed."

"Maybe you all could stay with us?" Shippo offered. "It'll be crowded, but we'll manage. Right Kagome?"

The young miko said nothing, simply patting his back.

Koga looked into Kagome's eyes as he spoke. "No. We wolves need our packs. Even if it kills me, I have to try." He began to tear away the bandages from his body before Kaede could stop him. The rest of them looked on until the last bandage fell away.

Ayame held her hand to her mouth, Ginta and Hakkaku cringed, Kichiro whimpered, and even Inuyasha gasped a little.

There were numerous scars on Koga's arms and legs. One massive, jagged scar ran from his lower back, up over his right shoulder, and continued down his arm to his hand. The left side of his face was similarly marked, pink scar tissue going from just above his eye down to his neck.

"Mirror?" He asked.

Without taking her eyes off of him, Kagome got out her compact from her backpack, opened it, and handed it to him.

Koga stared at his reflection for only a moment, then closed the compact and handed it back to her. He held out his mangled right hand and tried to make a fist, but his fingers refused to move. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and knelt.

"Kagome, Inuyasha." He began, giving them the most earnest look he could manage. His voice held none of it's usual arrogance and pride. "I need your help. There is a legendary treasure of my tribe, a powerful weapon called the Goraishi. If I get it, I may have a chance against my Grandfather. I know I don't deserve your help after everything I've done, but I can't get it by myself. You two are the strongest people I know. Please, will you help me?"

"No."

Inuyasha looked to Kagome as she stood, picking up her backpack. "I can't forgive you, and I won't help you. Inuyasha can if he wants to, but I won't. Ask someone else."

And with that she turned and headed out the door.

...

Kagome had expected Inuyasha would follow her. What she hadn't expected was for him to be silent. She had expected him to yell, to demand to know what the hell she was thinking. But he remained silent, following behind her until she reached the well. She sat on it, and only once he sat next to her did she look at him.

"He doesn't deserve any help." She repeated, looking away from him. She wished Inuyasha would yell at her. Wished he would get mad. Wished he would say something! Instead he just looked at her, not like he was angry. He looked...disappointed.

They sat in silence for a minute, until Kagome couldn't bare it any longer. She stood and glared at him.

"Say something!"

Inuyasha slowly stood. He grabbed her forearms, making sure she was looking at him.

"I want you to forgive him."

Kagome struggled in his grip. "He was going to kill you! He was going to kill Miroku and Sango and probably anyone else who got in his way! He was going to kidnap Shippo and me! How can you even ask me to forgive that?!"

Inuyasha held her still, keeping her eyes on his face as he spoke. "Not for his sake, for yours."

Kagome paused at that. "Wait, what...?"

Inuyasha took a breath, then let her go. He sat back down on the edge of the well, looking at the ground. Puzzled, Kagome sat next to him again.

"What do you mean for my sake?" She put her hand on his shoulder.

The hanyou didn't look up.

"You've always been kind. You don't like to see others hurt. You want to help people. You helped me. You gave me a chance when no one else would have. You saved me."

He finally looked up at her, and she was shocked to see his eyes shining with unshed tears.

"Inuyasha..."

"I asked you not to feel guilty about what happened to me because I didn't want to see it taint your spirit. Please, don't let anger destroy the light in you." He pleaded.

And that was when it hit her. Inuyasha wasn't angry. He wasn't disappointed. He was afraid. Her Inuyasha, who was so brave, was afraid for her.

He held both of her hands in his. "I don't want to lose that part of you. Please Kagome, for your own sake, have mercy."

She gently pulled her hands free, then hugged him to her. "Please don't cry Inuyasha. I'm sorry, but I haven't been entirely honest with you." She sighed. "I'm angry at Koga sure, but I'm even more angry with myself."

Inuyasha blinked, swiftly rubbing away his tears. "You are? But I already said I forgive you for everything that happened before."

Kagome nodded. "I know. But the truth is, I don't know if I can forgive myself. I hurt you so much, for so long, how can I ever make up for that?" She felt tears in her own eyes.

Inuyasha pulled back from her, grabbing her arms once again. "Kagome, please listen to me. My Mother told me something important once. She told me that forgiveness isn't something you earn. Forgiveness is a gift. You can try to make things right by your actions, but if you won't accept the gift of forgiveness than nothing you do will ever make things right. Do you understand?" He got down onto his knees, in the same position as Koga had begged for their help.

"Please Kagome, forgive him. Forgive yourself."

Kagome stood and pulled him up. "Alright, I'll try. That's all I can promise for now." She gave him a serious look. "But I don't want you to kneel like that before me ever again. You are my equal, not my slave. Not anymore."

Inuyasha nodded, taking her hand in his as they headed back to the village.

* * *

 

**Sappy I know, but I thought that Kagome still had a few issues to work out.**


	19. Tomb of The Alpha

**This will have almost nothing to do with how the Goraishi was obtained in the anime/manga.**

Chapter 19: Tomb of The Alpha

"I really can't come?"

"No, Kagome says you have to stay 'grounded' or whatever she calls it." Inuyasha told Shippo as the group prepared to leave. Behind him Sango and Miroku were checking the restraints on the three captured wolves. Inuyasha had no idea what to do about them, having never taken prisoners before, so he was hoping the others could deal with it. "To bad. An ancient tomb, a lost treasure, sounds exciting." He smirked as Shippo crossed his arms, glad to get a little revenge for all of the times the kitsune had teased or pranked him, before looking up.

"Hey Koga! Get your ass in gear! We're in a hurry here!"

The wolf prince growled lightly as Ayame and Kaede applied some last-minute salves to his wounds to try and get him as close to his former ability as possible.

Unfortunately for Koga while Kagome had agreed to help him, she had made it clear she would **not** let him use the nearly-complete jewel.

"And if we're not back in three days time, take Kichiro to Ayame's tribe." He instructed Ginta and Hakkaku. Both wolves nodded in response before Ginta looked around.

"Speaking of the cub, where is he?"

...

'And that should be the last one.' Kagome thought as she picked the last herb that she needed from Kaede's garden. She placed it into a plastic bag she had brought from her time and set it into her backpack with the others. She was just about to head in when Kichiro ran out of some bushes, nearly knocking her over. Without even so much as a glance her way he jumped up and tried to run past her.

"Stop right there young man!" Kagome hoped her attempt at a "Stern Mommy" voice would work

The little wolf paused, then turned to her and hid something behind his back. "Sorry..." He mumbled as he looked to the side, reminding her a lot of a certain hanyou.

Kagome crossed her arms. She didn't like playing disciplinarian, but it was clear this kid could stand to be taught some manners. "You ran right into me and almost knocked me over. And didn't your uncle tell you to stay inside until your wounds are healed?"

Kichiro rubbed the back of his head with his free hand. "...Yeah...but I'm okay now." He grinned up at her, looking just like his uncle. "Sorry I ran into you pretty lady, but I gotta go now."

Kagome grabbed his shoulder before he could leave. "Not so fast. What were you doing out here? Didn't I tell Shippo to keep you occupied?"

"Uh-hu, you did." The wolf boy nodded. "But...but he said you said he can't play outside and the inside is really boring...so I thought I'd bring him stuff from outside to play with."

Kagome's heart melted at that. Okay, Kichiro definitely reminded her of Inuyasha more than Koga now. "Is that what you're hiding behind your back?" She asked in a much gentler voice.

"Yep!" Kichiro beamed, holding out his closed fist. "Wanna see?"

Kagome smiled and held out her hand. Kichiro's smaller hand went over hers, and then she felt something...slimy...

"Isn't that the biggest, ugliest, slimiest slug you've ever seen?" Kichiro asked proudly, only to give a confused expression as the human began shrieking wildly.

...

"He didn't know any better." Koga assured Kagome as they gathered inside of Kaede's home. Ayame, Sango, and Miroku had agreed to stay behind in case Koga's Grandfather (or worse, Naraku) tried anything else.

Kagome stuck out her tongue and shuddered. "I can handle death and gore, but slugs and worms, ewwww!"

Inuyasha rolled his eyes before looking down as Shippo tugged on his pant leg.

"Come back alive okay?" The kitsune asked. "You promised you'd train me with my sword."

Inuyasha smirked a little at that. "Don't worry. If wolves made this tomb it can't be too dangerous. We'll be back before you know it." Before he even realized it he had knelt down and was ruffling the boy's red hair, much to Shippo's annoyance. "Stay out of trouble runt." He watched as Kagome hugged Shippo, then stood and followed Koga and himself outside.

"Can you keep up?" He asked the wolf as he let Kagome climb on his back.

Koga took a breath and began to walk, and after taking about ten steps he began to run.

"Guess that's a yes."

...

That night the three of them stopped to camp. Inuyasha went to catch some fish as Kagome built a fire.

"Anything I can do?"

Kagome looked up at Koga as the firelight flickered over his scarred face. "Oh, sorry. I guess I'm just so used to the others here that I assumed you knew." She shrugged. "Not really no. Inuyasha always gets the food if I don't bring something."

As if on cue Inuyasha landed next to them holding three large fish. "If you want to make yourself useful wolf, you can scale these."

Koga looked at the fish as if he'd never even seen one before. "Scale?"

"You know, take the scales off." Inuyasha sat next to him and began using his claws to scale one of the fish. "Like this."

The wolf blinked at that, then grabbed the handle of the sword he wore at his waist and pulled it from it's sheath. Even compared to the untransformed Tessaiga the sword was pitted and rusty, and looked like it couldn't cut warm butter.

"You're actually going to use that piece of junk?" Inuyasha asked as he finished scaling the first fish and began to gut it.

Koga gritted his teeth at that. "Well some of us don't have claws." He held the fish on his lap with his crippled right hand and tried to scale it with the rusty sword, without much success.

"Don't you have a good knife or something?" Inuyasha threw the fish guts in the fire before putting the fish on a stick and setting it over the fire.

"If I had one I'd use it dogsh..." He stopped mid-insult as Kagome glared at him, memories of his punishment the last time he antagonized Inuyasha flashing before his eyes. "I mean...no."

Oblivious to the looks between them, wholly focused on his task, Inuyasha set the second fish up over the fire. "Well then why even carry around that useless old thing?"

Koga shrugged. "I found it a long time ago and I thought it looked cool. Since we wolves don't work metal like humans do I was the only wolf who had one." He finally gave up in frustration, handing the third fish to Inuyasha to clean.

"Why not?"

Koga looked up as Kagome opened a bottle of water, drinking before putting the cap back and offering some to him. "Why don't the wolves work metal? Come to think of it, why do you live in caves and wear untanned furs?"

"Because we're youkai, not humans." Koga drank some of the water before staring in amazement at the container. "Humans are weak. That they have to pervert nature by doing things like working metal and growing crops proves they have no right to exist." He said in a tone that reminded Kagome of someone reciting something from habit in school.

"Oh is that so?" Kagome took the water from him. "Then I suppose you didn't need any of that medical care I gave you either?"

"Hey!" Koga grabbed for the water with his good hand, only for Inuyasha to grab his wrist with a growl. "I didn't mean it like that!"

"There is only one way to mean what you said." Kagome stared at the wolf. "Either you think all humans, including me, are weak and have no right to exist or you don't think that. Which is it?"

Koga lowered his gaze. "Grandfather said..."

"Who gives a shit what he said?!"

Inuyasha grabbed Koga's shoulders, making him look the hanyou in the eyes as the fire reflect in them. "In case you forgot wolf, your grandfather killed your father, stepmother, and baby sister, and has ordered the deaths of you and everyone you care about. Why the hell do you care what he said?"

Kagome sat in front of the two of them. "Koga, maybe it's time to think about what **you** believe, not what your grandfather told you to believe." She placed a hand on Inuyasha's shoulder, squeezing a little to let him know it was alright. "Do you think I'm weak? Do you think Inuyasha is weak?"

Koga looked to the two of them, first at one, then the other. Was she right? Was he just repeating what he'd been told by the older wolf?

"...No. You're both strong." He admitted after a tense silence. "Much as I hate to admit it, you're both far stronger than me."

Kagome nodded. "So, if he was wrong about that, maybe he's wrong about other things?"

Koga seemed lost in thought at that, and said nothing even as Inuyasha handed him the cooked fish.

...

"How much further is this burial ground anyway?" Inuyasha demanded as the noonday sun hung in the sky above the forest.

"It's close, I think." Koga shouted back as he ran behind the hanyou. Even carrying Kagome Inuyasha had to slow down so the wolf could keep up.

"You think?" Kagome asked from Inuyasha's back. She was glad he was running and not jumping, as sometimes while jumping in a forest with her on his back he would forget she was there and she'd get smacked in the face with sticks.

"I've never been there myself." Koga replied. "Only the old and sick go there to die." He stopped and sniffed the air. "It's close."

Inuyasha stopped and looked around. "I smell it too...that way." He began to run again. "So, I'm guessing we can't just walk in and grab this thing?"

"The legends say there are three trials." Koga said before looking away. "I...don't remember what they are."

"What?" Inuyasha skidded to a halt.

"I was a cub when I heard the story alright!” Koga waved his hands in front of himself.

“Wait, so this thing might not even exist?” Inuyasha demanded.

“It does exist!” Koga shouted back at him. “My elders wouldn’t lie to me!”

“Uh, guys...?”

Both boys looked up in the direction Kagome was pointing. In front of them stood two huge statues of wolf youkai, wearing armor and carrying katanas. Behind them stretched a deep canyon valley filled with bones.

“I think we’re here.”

...

“This place feels wrong.” Inuyasha thought out loud. “There are no bird songs, no insects. No life.”

“Show some respect. My ancestor’s bones are here.” Koga admonished him as Kagome climbed off of the hanyou’s back. Ignoring the bones for now, she looked at the two statues standing on either side of them. The were obviously supposed to be warriors, maybe even warrior kings. And their armor and swords looked to be pretty ornate, suggesting a high degree of craftsmanship.

‘Maybe the wolf youkai weren’t always as primitive as they are now?’ She thought to herself.

“Hey Kagome, you coming?”

Kagome looked up at Inuyasha’s voice. “Sorry, I’m coming.”

The three of them slowly made their way past the piles of bones in near total silence. Kagome couldn’t help feeling like they were being watched, and was half-sure she saw a skull move out of the corner of her eye. But when she turned it was right where it had been before.

It was Inuyasha who finally broke the silence. “So what now? Do we just start digging through the bones and hope to find this thing?”

Kagome was just about to scold Inuyasha for his rudeness in a place of burial when a figure stepped out from behind a section of the canyon wall in front of them.

"We wouldn't advise that."

Inuyasha instinctively reached for Tessaiga before Kagome's hand on his wrist made him pause. The figure looked like a wolf youkai, but very old. It wore clothing that reminded Inuyasha of the nobles in his childhood home. Of more immediate note was that the figure was partially transparent, he could see right through him.

After a few moments Koga found his voice. "What...who are you?"

"We are the elders of long ago." The spirit spoke not in one voice, but dozens speaking in unison. "We created this place to hold the remains of the war, as a monument to the pride and arrogance that nearly destroyed our race."

Koga shook his head. "I don't care about that. I've come for the Goraishi."

A rumbling sound echoed through the canyon, causing the bones around the three of them to rattle as Kagome huddled against Inuyasha.

"The cub would be wise to respect his elders." The spirit crossed it's phantasmal arms and glared sternly at Koga. The wolf prince quickly knelt before him, followed by Kagome and (with a bit of prodding) Inuyasha.

"Please, share your wisdom with us." Kagome asked, hoping to make up for Koga's rudeness.

The spirit nodded. "Stand." As the three of them stood the spirit looked to each of them.

"Koga of the eastern tribe." He began, eyeing the wolf. "Why do you seek the Goraishi?"

Koga let out a breath he didn't realize he had been holding in. "I need it to defeat my Grandfather and regain my position as alpha of my pack."

The spirit shook it's head. "The Goraishi was created to defend and unite the race of wolf youkai. Instead it has taken the lives of countless wolves and been the cause for the killing of countless more." The spirit gestured to a nearby wall of stone. As the three of them watched deep gouges began to form on the stone, as if invisible claws were being drawn across the surface. Gradually, a series of pictures began to come together.

"Once wolf youkai had a great and mighty kingdom." The spirit began as the first picture finished up, showing wolf youkai living in huts, wearing armor, and using swords and spears to slay monstrous-looking youkai that threatened them. "All were ruled by one alpha, a king of our kind."

The next picture showed a group of older wolves working in a forge and chanting over something. "One day, the alpha ordered us, the greatest craftsmen and sages of the kingdom, to his side. He commanded us to create a weapon that would serve as the symbol of our kind, of the unity of the kingdom. Together, we elders created the Goraishi."

The next picture showed a wolf in full armor, with a set of metal claws on his right hand. From it's tips he shot lighting at a group of huge centipede youkai. "The alpha was pleased with our creation. All envied the wolf kingdom. Even the new race of humans sent tribute. But then..."  
Another picture finished, this one showing four wolf youkai arguing over the body of the alpha. "The alpha died in battle. His four sons each desired the Goraishi for themselves, even though by rights it was the eldest brother's. Each drew popular support for his claim, and soon there was bloodshed."

The next picture was of a battle, wolf youkai fighting each other. The picture was longer than the others, implying time was passing. As it did the wolves depicted were no longer wearing armor or carrying weapons, instead wearing furs and fighting with their fists and feet. "The war went on for years, and then generations. The Goraishi was taken up first by one brother, only to be stolen by another soon after. When all four brothers had been killed others tried to claim it. Art, culture, and craft fell by the wayside as generations grew up knowing only war, many not even really knowing why they still fought."

The spirit gestured to a final picture. This showed the same elders from before, but even older. "Finally, we took the Goraishi from a petty warlord and looked on in sadness at what our creation had wrought. Our kind had split apart, and no longer considered each other as one tribe. We resolved to keep the Goraishi here, within the tomb of the alpha, where it could wait for a true alpha to claim it and unite the race of wolf youkai once again. If you, Koga, intend to be that alpha, then you must pass our three tests."

"I do." Koga replied. "And I, we are ready for anything you can throw at us."

The spirit gestured to a nearby wall. The stone shimmered and waved like water reflecting sunlight, until they could see through it into a cave made of worked stone.

"Then go." The spirit said. "Your tests are in there. You will face the test of regret, the test of fear, and the test of the mirror. Your companions must pass each test as well, or we shall refuse you."

The scarred wolf looked to Inuyasha and Kagome. "You two...are you sure you want to do this?"

"Like hell I'm coming all of this way to turn back now." Inuyasha walked forwards into the cave. Kagome rolled her eyes a little and followed him, Koga close behind.

...

Kagome pulled a flashlight from her backpack and turned it on, the light piercing the darkness. Her two companions, of course, could see in the dark just fine. Together they began to walk through the narrow cave.

"Stay close to me." Inuyasha told Kagome even as he tried to shove down his fears of the cramped, dark cave. 'I'm not afraid. I'm not afraid.'

Kagome placed her arm around his back. "It's okay. You can do this."

Soon the cave suddenly widened into a large room. The spirit was standing in the middle of the room, waiting for them.

"Your first test will begin now." He said. "You must answer truthfully, or you will not be allowed to proceed." He looked first to Inuyasha.

"Inuyasha, where to begin? So many have suffered and died to protect you. Your father, your mother, Kikyo. Even Kagome suffered to rescue you. Do you think it was all worth it? Do you think you are worth it?"

Inuyasha glared at the spirit. "What do you want me to say, no? I can't judge that, but I can say that at least they all thought I was worth something. And if they thought so, who am I to argue? I wish they didn't have to suffer and die, but I can't change the past. All I can do is keep on living so those sacrifices have meaning."

"An honest answer." The spirit replied before looking to Kagome.

"Kagome Higurashi. You have great power. But even that power wasn't enough for you, was it? You had to have power over Inuyasha, to have a leash at his neck. You enjoyed the power the beads gave you, didn't you? Even after you knew they were not needed you kept them. Why?"

Kagome hung her head in shame. "It's true. I did enjoy that power over him. I'm not proud of the fact. I was a bully, there's no other word for how I acted. I used the beads to hurt him, but also to keep him close. I was worried that if it weren't for them he would leave me alone, maybe even go to hell with Kikyo." She rubbed a tear from her right cheek with the back of her hand. "But Inuyasha has forgiven me. And...I've started to forgive myself. I've more than paid for my actions. Like he said, I can't change the past. I can only do better moving forwards."

Inuyasha pulled Kagome to him, hugging her to his chest. "Satisfied?" He asked while continuing to fix the spirit with a glare.

"Not yet." The spirit tuned to Koga. "Koga of the eastern tribe..."

"Let me spare you the trouble." Koga interrupted the spirit. "Yes, I failed. I'm a failure as a mate to Ayame, as alpha to my pack, and as a man. I sought easy power, and for that I have been crippled. And now I seek the Goraishi so I can at least use it to die an honorable death against an opponent I have no hope of defeating."

The spirit nodded in response. Behind him the back of the room shimmered like the entrance to the tomb had, revealing another chamber. "You have passed the test of regret. By admitting your faults, you display the humility needed in a true alpha."

Once again the spirit disappeared, and the three of them moved on into the next chamber.

...

Inuyasha shot awake.

'Where am I?'

He looked around, surrounded by darkness. He was cold, and he couldn't move his arms.

'Nononono!'

He crawled over to the corner, whimpering in terror as the door slid open, a familiar figure silhouetted in the light.

"Time for your lesson Dog." Master said with his usual smirk, whip in hand. He approached the boy slowly, drawing out his terror while Inuyasha trembled.

He hadn't been rescued. It had only been a dream. He was a weak little dog, powerless against Master.

.

.

.

.

No!

With a growl the hanyou got to his feet and pushed the slave trader against the wall.

"My name is Inuyasha!" He shouted as he clutched at the man's neck. "And I am nobody's slave!" He bashed the man's head against the wall over and over again, until he faded away as if Inuyasha had been trying to hold smoke. Instantly the dungeon disappeared, leaving Inuyasha standing in the tomb. Next to him Kagome and Koga stood staring ahead as if in a trance.

...

In the middle of a forest Kagome sobbed as Inuyasha's lifeless body turned cold. Why had she done it? Why had she let these stupid fights happen? Was protecting Koga's ego really worth Inuyasha's life?

"Inuyasha I'm sorry!" She pleaded, praying he would open his eyes. "Please don't die!"

The hanyou didn't move, his wide open eyes seeming to accuse her.

It was all her fault. It was all her fault. It was all her...

OUCH!

"Damn it Kagome, wake up!"

Kagome rubbed her cheek. "Inuyasha? But where...?"

She looked to the body at her feet. This wasn't Inuyasha at all. It was just a pile of old clothes.

"Inuyasha isn't dead." She told herself. "He isn't dead. I still have a chance to do better."

Around her the forest shimmed and vanished, even as Inuyasha appeared with his arms around her.

"Please Kagome, wake up!"

"Inuyasha?" Kagome touched his face, then rubbed her cheek. "You could have just shouted really loud."

...

Koga crawled through the mud, getting nowhere fast.

"Some alpha." A voice behind him taunted. He felt a foot on his broken back. "Little runt can't even beat his dear old grandfather."

The wolf prince growled, looking ahead of him at the bodies of Ginta, Hakkaku, Kichiro, Ayame, Kagome, his father, stepmother, and baby sister.

He had failed.

"You were always weak." The alpha sneered, stomping on his back once again. "Without the jewel shards you're less than nothing. No one will support you as alpha."

Koga howled in anguish, knowing the older wolf was right.

"Koga!" Kagome's voice shouted.

Something knocked the older wolf back and pulled Koga to his feet. To his surprise he could stand.

"No, you're wrong! Ginta, Hakkaku, Ayame, and Kichiro all stood by me even before I had the jewel shards! I don't need them to lead my people!"

He ran forwards, his fist pounding into the tomb wall hard enough to leave an imprint as the scene faded. He looked behind him at Kagome and Inuyasha. All around them were scattered the skeletons of would-be alphas who had been unable to escape their nightmares.

"I think we're done here."

Ahead of them the wall shimmered once again, revealing the third and final chamber as the spirit's voice came from nowhere. "You have passed the test of fear, and are the first to do so in fact. A true alpha is able to conquer his fears for the good of the tribe."

...

This chamber was different than the first two. The stone was glass-like, and polished to a mirror finish. Strangely though, the three of them only had reflections on the wall directly facing them.

"What is this?" Inuyasha crossed his arms while Kagome made her reflection wave at them. Suddenly her reflection stopped waving and stared at her.

"Um...guys...?"

As one their reflections walked forwards, changing as they steeped out of the mirrored surface. Koga's had no scars, but it's face was a mask of contempt and vanity. Inuyasha's double was his youkai form, snarling like a rabid animal.

Kagome's double, however, changed the most. It's hair was white, and it wore a black and grey version of the miko clothing Kikyo and Kaede wore. It reminded her of Tsubaki. It smiled evilly as it grabbed it's bow and drew an arrow.

A second hung in the air, time seeming to stand still, before the doubles attacked.

"We are no better than that slaver trader." Kagome's double hissed at her as it fired an arrow. Kagome rolled out of the way and drew her bow. "We only want Inuyasha as a slave."

Inuyasha was blocking his double's claws with the Tessaiga, but was being pushed back by the stronger, faster youkai.

"We are nothing but another monster!" The youkai roared. "We are good only for killing! It's all we were ever good for!"

Inuyasha growled, trying to find an opening.

Meanwhile Koga was getting pounded by the fists of his healthier double. "We only care about power." It said, starting to strangle him. "Our tribe can die for all we care. As long as we get more power who cares what happens to them?"

Kagome and her double shot arrow after arrow at each other, their aura's protecting them from their opponent's arrows. All throughout it her double never stopped taunting her.

"We are a tyrant, a hypocrite who claims to love Inuyasha but instead enslaves him. He deserves better than us." It laughed and readied another arrow. "One day we will ask Kaede for the power to kill him with a word."

"Shut up!"

Kagome ran towards her double and tackled her to the ground. "I've heard enough!" She began to punch her dark twin in the face. "I am **nothing** like you! I've done many things for Inuyasha! I've suffered for him and would gladly do so again! I've been his friend! I love him! He is my equal, not my slave!" She grabbed an arrow and jammed it into her double's throat. Instantly she found herself alone on the polished floor, her normal reflection staring back at her.

Inuyasha looked to Kagome, then began to force his double backwards. "I'm no monster! You may be a part of me, but I have a human side too! And thanks to Kikyo you're locked away where you can't hurt anyone else forever! So shut up and die already!" He ended the statement with a wind scar that tore the youkai apart. Strangely even that didn't mark the mirrored surface.

Koga used his legs to get leverage, flipping his double onto it's back and grabbing it's neck with his left hand. "You are not me! I love Ayame! I love my tribe! They need a real leader, not an arrogant asshole like you!" He screamed as he broke the other wolf's neck. As it vanished he panted on the floor, looking up as a clawed hand was offered to him. He grabbed it and let Inuyasha help him up.

Once again the spirit spoke. "One's greatest enemy will always be oneself. A true alpha must always keep that in mind. You have passed the final test." A section of the wall shimmered, revealing a small room with a stone sarcophagus at the center.

...

The three companions slowly approached the sarcophagus. Laying on the stone lid was a set of five silver claws that were connected to a wristband through the use of small chains.

"I can't believe it." Koga stared at the claws in awe as he picked them up. "The Goraishi. I never thought...hey, you two alright?"

Inuyasha and Kagome were staring straight ahead. Without a word Inuyasha lay on the sarcophagus, pulling open his robes to expose his chest. Kagome moved to his head and grabbed his arms.

"What are you doing?" Koga demanded.

"You didn't really believe that was all there was, did you?" The spirit's voices rang out. "True power requires sacrifice."

Koga looked around him, trying to find where the voice. "You can't be serious! You want me too..."

"Use the Goraishi. Tear the heart from your companion's chest. Unless you are willing to sacrifice him, the Goraishi will not work."

Koga looked at the silver claws. "My tribe...they're depending on me..." He closed his eyes.

_"Father, why is Grandfather mad at you?"_

_The wolf sighed, patting the space next to him for the boy to sit. "He isn't happy about your new mother and sister."_

_"Why not?"_

_"He doesn't think youkai and humans should be together."_

_The little wolf thought about that._

_"How come you didn't pick a mate from the tribe?"_

_His father looked over at his wife nursing their daughter. "Koga, the tribe is important. But not so important that you should go against your heart for it." He gently poked the boy's chest. "Listen to this, it will tell you what's right."_

With a growl he threw the blades to the floor. "Forget it! We're leaving! Now open the way out before I bash my way through!"

The spirit appeared before him as Inuyasha stood. "What the...?"

"You have passed the true final test." The spirit picked up the Goraishi. "A true alpha will not sacrifice allies for his own power." He placed the blades on Koga's right hand. With a flash of light they grew into long claws.

"Koga of the eastern tribe, you have earned the right to call yourself the true alpha of the wolf youkai." The spirit began to glow. "We will power the Goraishi. As a final gift, we will restore your hand. Use what you have learned to lead our people back to greatness."

As the spirit vanished in a flash of light Koga clenched his fist, finding that he could move his fingers. Be dismissed the Goraishi, then brought it back, now as much a part of him as his head.

"You did it." Kagome smiled. Inuyasha smirked a little.

"Mine's still cooler."


	20. Amends

Chapter 20: Amends

Kagome watched from her place by the fire as Inuyasha and Koga fought. Inuyasha as always had his Tessaiga in his hands, while the Goraishi decorated Koga's newly restored right hand.

But this was different from their past fights. This time neither really wanted to hurt the other. She could see them pulling blows, missing obvious openings as they blocked, countered, and parried among the trees. Even their insults weren't really insulting.

"Come on, you can't be **that** slow without those jewel shards?"

"You getting soft Pup? You used to hit harder."

"I don't use my full strength on broken-down wolves who look like they stuck their face in a fire."

"Still better looking than you."

Kagome sighed and shook her head as she checked on the ramen she was making to celebrate their victory. Well, best to be thankful for small blessings. Even if they still weren't quite friends, they at least were no longer enemies. That was it. Focus on the positive.

Truth be told, Kagome was still a bit shaken up from the tomb of the alpha. It wasn't everyday she faced her regrets, her fears, and her dark side one after the other. Though the boys seemed to be doing just fine as they fought/trained. In fact she thought if they had tails they'd be wagging. As she watched Inuyasha tackled Koga to the ground, finally 'winning'.

"You'll have to do better than that wolf." He smirked with one hand on Koga's shoulder to pin him to the ground and the other holding the Tessaiga to the wolf's neck. "If this were a real fight your head would be off by now."

"And you'd be breathing your last out of the gaping hole in your chest."

Inuyasha looked down, noticing the Goraishi's five claws pressed against his chest. "Keh, it'll take more than just your hand through my chest to kill me. Ask my bastard of a half-brother." He rolled off of Koga, putting the Tessaiga back in it's sheath before hopping up and offering the wolf a clawed hand.

The wolf prince sat up, taking Inuyasha's offered hand. "Half-brother?"

"We're not close or anything." He said as he pulled Koga up before holding his head high and crossing his arms. "He's never gotten over the fact that our dad liked me best and so gave me the Tessaiga while all he got was the western lands."

"What?" Koga blinked. "Are you...you're saying Sesshomaru is your half-brother?"

Inuyasha shrugged as Kagome called the two of them over for dinner. "Yeah, so?" He took his ramen and sat next to her.

Koga sat opposite them and thanked Kagome for his ramen. "I met him once. He's an arrogant prick who acts like he's got a stick up his ass."

Inuyasha threw his head back and laughed as he ate. "Yeah, he's always been like that."

Kagome smiled as the two boys laughed and joked at Sesshomaru's expense. Pretty soon they were competing to see who could do the best imitation of Inuyasha's elder brother. That had ended with Inuyasha walking around with his left arm hidden in his shirt, scowling at a rock and demanding it submit to the mighty Sesshomaru. Koga was holding his gut as he laughed on the ground and even Kagome had to admit his imitation was spot on, though she had refused to pretend to be Jaken.

Koga wiped his eyes as he sat up. "So, you really don't care that he has your father's lands?"

Inuyasha shook his head. "Why would I? What the hell would I do with them?" He snaked an arm around Kagome's waist as she blushed. "I have everything I need to be happy."

...

"Kagome?"

Kagome opened her eyes. To her surprise Inuyasha knelt next to her sleeping bag. She immediately sat up, looking around for danger.

"No, nothing's after us." The hanyou quickly assured her. "But I told the wolf there might be to get him out of the way." He moved to sit next to her. "You've been quiet tonight. In fact you've been quiet ever since we left the wolf burial grounds." His golden eyes looked into her brown ones. "So tell me what's wrong already before I have to sit you up in a tree again."

Kagome glared a little at him, then sighed. "No...you don't have to do that again. I'm just...still shook up about what I saw in that mirror room back in the tomb. My double, I think she was what I might have become if I continued acting like I was before...you know."

Inuyasha thought a bit, then put his hand on her shoulder like she did to him when he was upset, reminding her he was there for her. "You think you'd have become like that? A dark miko?"

"It's happened before." She reminded him. It was amazing how, after all that had happened, his touch still filled her stomach with butterflies. "If Tsubaki could turn out like that, then so could I." She looked away from him. "I still could one day."

"Stop it."

Inuyasha gently took her chin and made her face him. "Stop it. You are nothing like that witch. You and her have absolutely nothing in common."

"How do you know that?!" She shouted a little louder than she had meant to. "Sorry..."

Inuyasha saw that this was serious, and took her by her upper arms.

"Kagome...tell my why you think you might turn evil."

Kagome tried to turn away, but his earnest expression made it hard to ignore the question. Finally she had to give in.

"You don't think I do all of that homework, studying, and tests because I like it do you? In my time I don't get to make very many decisions. Someone is always telling me what to do. In some ways I guess I envied you. For most of your life you've been free. You could go wherever you wanted, do whatever you felt like. No one told you how to dress, how to act, what to eat, when to sleep."

"Are you kidding?!" The hanyou shouted before realizing he had also been louder than he'd meant to. "I would kill to live your life! To be accepted and have a family who loved me!"

Kagome sighed. "I know it doesn't excuse how I acted, but after I had the beads on you, that was the first time in my life I had power." She sniffed a little.

Inuyasha's head twisted slightly to the side. "I don't get it..."

"For once I was the one giving the orders. I could tell you what to do and you had to do it or I would hurt you." She explained, lowering her gaze. "I liked it. I liked it and kept doing it even though I knew it was wrong. That's why I'm worried I'll turn out like Tsubaki. If I could act like that before, how can I be sure I won't again?"

Inuyasha held her to his chest. "You won't because I know you won't. You said you believe in me right? That I'm not a monster? Well I believe in you. How can I not?"

Kagome eagerly returned the hug. Maybe she was being too hard on herself? Yes, she had made mistakes. But over the last horrible, hard month of almost losing Inuyasha forever, of suffering to find him, and building him back up after that slaver had torn him down, she had changed. She had learned to accept responsibility for her mistakes, to acknowledge them and to resolve to do better. To stop trying to control Inuyasha all of the time and sometimes let him take the lead.

"Thank you Inuyasha." She said, looking up into his eyes as tears filled her own. "Thank you for having faith in me. Thank you for putting up with me. Thank you for forgiving me. And thank you for helping me forgive myself."

Inuyasha kissed her forehead. "And thank you for having faith in me. Thank you for putting up with me. Thank you for forgiving me. And thank you for helping me forgive myself."

...

"Kagome!"

Kagome had only just stepped into Kaede's home when her arms were suddenly filled with a small furry bundle. "Hello Shippo." She smiled, placing the kitsune on her shoulders. She watched as Kichiro ran up to Koga along with Ayame and Ginta and Hakkaku, all crowding around him to see the Goraishi as Koga showed it off.

"I...I still can't believe it's real. Just like in the legends." Ayame held his wrist to look at the claws before hugging him. "I knew you could do it!"

"Can I try it?" The little wolf boy asked his uncle, only to pout when told it was a part of Koga now.

After a few minutes of everyone catching up Koga approached Sango, who was standing guard over the three wolves being held prisoner.

"They give you any trouble Slayer?" He asked her. She crossed her arms and glared at the three, instantly making them cringe and look at the floor.

"I've got it under control." She replied.

"You should have seen it." Shippo whispered to Kagome. "And I thought you were scary when you get mad."

Koga stared at the three bound wolves before summoning the Goraishi.

"I should kill the three of you for what you did."

Kagome moved to stop him before Ayame held out an arm to block her. Understanding, Kagome watched along with the others.

"But I will allow you to live if you acknowledge me as your alpha and swear on your father's honor never to betray me again." He added.

The three wolves looked at each other, then bowed and bared their necks to him. "I swear on my father's honor." They said in unison. Koga nodded at that.

"Untie them." He told Sango. The slayer looked to Kaede, who gave her a nod. With a final glare at the three prisoners she released them from their bonds.

"Come." The wolf prince ordered them. "Ayame, Ginta, Hakkaku, you too. We have a lot to talk about."

...

"So the wolves weren't always as savage as they are now?" Miroku asked as he helped prepare lunch.

"Looks like it." Kagome nodded while cutting vegetables. "I hope Koga and Ayame can work together to remind them that they were once something more."

Sango finished cleaning the rice and set it in the pot to boil. "Will you two be journeying with Koga back to his tribe to confront his Grandfather?"

"If he wants us too." Kagome sighed before adding the vegetabless to the rice. She felt a tug on her skirt. Looking down she saw Kichiro staring up at her.

"Is Uncle Koga gonna be the alpha again?" The boy asked her. "Is Momma going to come back?"

Kagome bit her lip as she knelt before the little wolf. "You don't know where your mother is?"

"We got separated when we ran from Grandfather." He sniffed. "I've never been away from her before. Ayame has been nice to me, but I really miss her."

Kagome smiled and hugged the little boy. "I'm sure she's looking for you, and is going to be very happy when we bring you back to her." She picked him up and held him on her hip. "Do you want to help us make lunch?"

From across the room Inuyasha watched as Kagome showed the wolf boy how to stir the rice. 'She'll be a great Mom someday.' He thought.

"Hey, snap out if it!" Shippo demanded, holding his sword in front of him. "You promised!"

Inuyasha smirked as he followed the boy outside. "Just don't go crying to Kagome because you think I'm too rough."

...

After lunch was ready Kagome called out for Inuyasha and Shippo. The boy came rushing in, eagerly telling Kagome about how awesome he was with his new sword and how he could protect everyone from now on, no need for her to worry. Inuyasha nodded as he came in, giving Kagome a look that said he had indeed gone easy on the boy. As everyone settled down to eat Inuyasha said he would eat later, there was something important he had to take care of.

"What about...?" Kagome paused. No, she had promised herself she would stop trying to control him. "Alright, but be back soon. Your food will get cold."

"I'll be quick." He promised as he headed out. But instead of running for the forest, he doubled back to the shrine on the hill behind Kaede's home. Once there Inuyasha knelt in front of a grave marker. With some effort he was able to make out the characters that spelled out Kikyo thanks to Kaede and Kagome's teaching.

"Hello Kikyo." He said softly, bowing his head against the grass. "I'm sorry I didn't come sooner."

Inuyasha sat in silence for a moment.

"I didn't come when I heard you died the first time, after Naraku's deception. I guess...I didn't want to see your grave. Because that would mean you were really dead. Even as mad as I was at you then, I couldn't have handled that. You were the only person in my life besides my mother who treated me as if I were more than a monster. To think that I was totally alone again just hurt too much."

He let out a breath, ears going flat. "I admit, when that witch brought you back a part of me hoped we could be together again. That we could just pretend it had all been some horrible nightmare. When I next saw you I tried to pretend that nothing was different. That even though you were dead and ate souls, it didn't matter to me."

Inuyasha laughed lightly, shaking his head. "I've never been a good liar, least of all to myself."

He sat up, looking at the grave marker. "That time, when you tried to drag me to hell, I knew you were gone. The Kikyo I loved was lost to me forever, and what was left was a hate-filled undead creature that just happened to look like her. But even then I wanted you with me. I thought a hate-filled undead creature was all I deserved and still better than being alone."

Not smelling anyone nearby, Inuyasha let the tears in his eyes fall.

"But I was lying to myself even then. I lied about my feelings for Kagome, tried to push her away. I still blamed myself for what happened to you and thought I didn't deserve to be loved, only punished. That she refused to condemn me, that she treated me like a human and worthy of love, made me furious."

A few tears fell to the ground.

"It took finding out that you had given our jewel shards to Naraku that finally made me give up on you. In fact, part of me began to hate you. I thought everything we had ever shared was a lie. That you had never really loved me even when you were alive."

Inuyasha hung his head in shame. "I think I would have killed you if we had met again after that." He shut his eyes tightly. "But...Kagome has told me you didn't know about the breaking of the Tessiaga and the release of my youkai side. She says you were sorry. And then you sacrificed yourself, knowing Hell probably awaited you, to seal my youkai side away once again." He opened his eyes to stare at the ground.

"I'm sorry for doubting you. You made a lot of bad choices, but in the end you tried to make up for them. Because deep down you were still the real Kikyo after all. I forgive you, and I'll never forget you."

Inuyasha heard a sound behind him. He quickly wiped his eyes and cursed himself for allowing himself to be snuck up upon.

"What do you want?"

Sango knelt next to him, holding a bowl of rice. "Kagome said for me to bring you your lunch."

Inuyasha blushed at being seen in such a vulnerable state. "How long were you watching?"

"Long enough." She replied. "Inuyasha, there's something I need to say to you. Something I should have said a long time ago."

The hanyou blinked. "Okay..."

"Thank you." Sango began. "Thank you for your mercy. When we first met and I tried to kill you, you didn't hold it against me. Even when I stole your sword to give to Naraku in exchange for my brother's life you refused to condemn me. I just wanted you to know that I'm forever grateful to you for that. Thank you Inuyasha."

Inuyasha wasn't sure what to say to that. He had been so rarely praised for anything in his life.

"I...you're welcome...?" He finally said.

Sango smiled and helped him up, bowing to Kikyo's grave. "After lunch Miroku wants to thank you for something too."

 


	21. Bloodlines

Chapter 21: Bloodlines

"So thank you Inuyasha. Thank you for giving me hope for a future."

Inuyasha rubbed the back of his head nervously. First Sango and now Miroku were thanking him, even praising him. It was all a little much to the hanyou who was so used to being insulted and reviled.

"Uh...you're welcome I guess." He finally said before shaking his head and continuing on into Kaede's home. "Enough of this sappy bullshit. Let's eat!"

The monk and the slayer looked at each other and rolled their eyes. They knew Inuyasha was plagued by self-doubt and questions about his own worth due to his rejection by both halves of his blood, making him often moody and irritable. But still they hoped to get him to open up more to them.

Someday.

...

"Do you have to go already? You just got back." Shippo pleaded from Kagome's lap.

The young miko nodded her head as she placed extra food in her backpack. "Koga's Grandfather has a jewel shard. We don't have a choice."

"If we don't get it Naraku will." Inuyasha added as he inspected the three recently released wolf prisoners. Though Koga had said they were loyal to him as their alpha once again, the hanyou wasn't quite so willing to trust them.

"Listen you mangy wolves. If I so much as suspect you plan to betray us I'll tear your heads off." Inuyasha grabbed the biggest one by the neck and lifted him as if he were a feather, growling and baring his teeth. "Got it?"

Ayame saw what he was doing and almost ran to help them before Koga's hand at her shoulder made her pause. The wolf prince shook his head.

"Y-yes...we understand." The wolf in Inuyasha's grip choked out. "Koga has told us...of our past...we used to be so much more."

The other two wide-eyed wolves quickly nodded. "We want to help him raise our people up again." One of them added.

Inuyasha glared at the three of them, before he released the wolf in his grip and carelessly let him fall to the ground. "Good." He turned from the three wolves and headed to Kagome. "I'll be watching."

The wolf stood, clutching at his throat before moving to stand next to his companions. Koga walked over to them, Ayame in tow.

"Don't think I'll stop him either." He said. "You three are still on thin ice with me. I'd better not see any of you anywhere near Kichiro."

The first wolf coughed and lowered his hand from his throat, nodding. "Yes alpha."

Koga nodded and dismissed the three of them with a wave of his hand. "Go wait outside until we're ready to leave." The three of them cringed as he raised his hand, then hurried to obey.

After the three of them were gone Koga sighed and lowered his head. "Is this what I can expect from now on?"

Ayame moved him to sit near the fire with her. Around them the humans were talking, Inuyasha was showing off Tessiaga to Kichiro, and Ginta and Hakkaku were being made to help clean up from lunch (alongside a still-grounded kitsune) by Kaede as she scolded their lack of table manners.

"When I first became alpha, I swore I wasn't going to be like my Grandfather." Koga told Ayame. "I was going to be different. My tribe would obey me because they respected me, not out of fear like they had him."

Ayame gently placed a hand on his back, tracing the large scar. Koga leaned into her touch.

"But somewhere along the way I forgot about that. I started to crave power more than anything, and look where that got me." He indicated his scars. "Now I have to keep those three in fear for their lives..." He shook his head and looked at her. "Is that what it's going to be like when I'm alpha once again? Will I have no choice but to be a brutal tyrant or be overthrown? Am I going to be no different than him?"

Ayame grabbed his face and turned it to her, kissing his lips softly. When she pulled back she gave him a firm look. "No. Not if I have anything to say about it."

...

Together Inuyasha, Kagome, Koga, Ayame, Ginta, Hakkaku, Kichiro, and the other three wolves set out for the eastern pack's territory. As usual Kagome was on Inuyasha's back, while Koga carried his nephew in the same way.

"Inuyasha, slow down!" Kagome yelled as she hung on to him.

"Not my fault the wolves can't keep up!" Inuyasha taunted as he ran.

After some time Kagome finally convinced Inuyasha to slow down, through they still moved ahead of the wolves.

"Hey Kagome..." The hanyou began after making sure the wolves were still out if hearing range. "You...you got a minute?"

"I'm riding on your back." She reminded him, rubbing one of his ears. "What do you want to talk about?"

Inuyasha closed his eyes at the rubbing. "I've been thinking...about after we win this fight and Naraku is dead."

"Oh..." Kagome replied softly. "I've been wondering that too."

Inuyasha was silent for nearly half a minute after that, before finally speaking up. "I was just wondering if you were still going to come back here?"

"What?" She grabbed onto his shoulders as he ran. "Of course I am? Why wouldn't I?"

"You...you've got a life in your era." The boy carrying her said. "Your family is there, your friends, that school place you go to, that Hojo guy."

Kagome was suddenly struck by a terrible thought. "Inuyasha, do you not want me to come back?"

"No!" Inuyasha rapidly shook his head. "I mean yes! Wait I mean no...!" He looked back at her over his shoulder. "I just don't want you to think you have to keep coming back here if you don't want to. Nobody would blame you if you wanted to go back to your safe, normal life once this is over."

'So that's what this is about.' Kagome thought as she wrapped her arms around him. "Inuyasha, I want to keep coming back to this era. I want to see Miroku and Sango and Keade. I want to see Shippo grow up." She leaned forwards and softly kissed his head between his dog ears. "And I want to be with you."

She felt Inuyasha relax, and realized how tense he must have been for her response. Had he really been worried she would abandon him? Didn't he know by now she would never do that?

But then again, with his past could she blame him for his trust issues?

"Remember that I've always come back because I wanted to see **you**." She continued as she held onto him. "Because **you** are worth it. I don't care what Sesshomaru or any of those awful people from your childhood told you. **You** have value. **You** are important to me and to all of our friends. Always remember that Inuyasha."

Inuyasha was silent, but she could have sworn she heard him sniffle. He suddenly sped up until the wolves were even further behind before slowing down again.

"Kagome?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you." He swallowed. "I know I haven't always been fair to you. I tried to push you away, insulted you, and treated you like dirt, all because..." He paused. "Because I didn't think I deserved someone like you."

Kagome rested her head on his shoulder. "I understand. You don't have to apologize. Those stupid fights we used to have were just as much my fault as yours. Remember what you said? About both of us trying to do better?"

Inuyasha nodded, then slowed down again to let the wolves catch up.

...

As night approached the group stopped to make camp. After catching dinner and setting it to cook Koga started to chase Kichiro around, seeming to always just miss him as the little wolf laughed.

Kagome sat next to Inuyasha and smiled at the cute sight. "Strange to see Koga acting so much like a dad."

Inuyasha shrugged as he held his fish on a stick over the fire. "Well he is his uncle."

Kagome shook her head. "I meant that he doesn't really seem the paternal type."

"Keh, I'd be one to talk." The hanyou said.

"Hey, you've been a good father to Shippo given the circumstances." She placed her hand on his shoulder. "I know he can be a bit of a handful."

'You mean he's a brat.' Inuyasha thought, but said nothing.

Kagome watched the wolves play for a few minutes before noticing Inuyasha looking away.

"Inuyasha?"

"Hmm?" He looked back at her. "Oh, sorry. I was just thinking about my father."

Kagome briefly wondered if she shouldn't have brought the subject up, but decided to press on. "You mean what he was like?"

Inuyasha leaned back against a tree. "Sometimes I wish I had just one memory of my father. Just one would be enough really. Mother never talked much about him; and when I would ask her about him she would get really sad. I think she thought she'd have more time to tell me about him once I was older..." He sighed. "And it's not like Sesshomaru has been exactly eager to have a heart to heart about our old man."

Kagome was silent for a moment, before she began to speak. "My best memory of my father is him taking me to my first day of school. I was so scared that I cried. But he just hugged me and told me what a big girl I was and that he was so proud of me." She smiled at the memory, then frowned. "He died right after Sota was born."

The hanyou felt her lean against him. "How?"

"It was an accident." She told him. "He was in a car wreck. You know those metal things people in my time use to get around? Another one hit his from the front really hard."

Inuyasha slowly took her hand in his. "You don't have to talk about it if you don't want too."

"It's okay." She said before wiping her eyes. He gently squeezed her hand as she continued, trying to frame it in a way that he would understand.

"Dad didn't die right away. The doctors in my time used special machines that can breath for a patient and pump their blood to keep him alive for a while. But his brain..." She sniffled. "His brain had been too badly hurt. The doctors showed Mama other machines that could tell what was going on in his brain, and they showed that his brain wasn't working anymore. They said that Dad would never recover. He'd never wake up; never be able to walk or talk or even open his eyes again."

Inuyasha placed his arm across her shoulders.

"Mama and the doctors decided that there was nothing more that could be done for him except...turn off the machines and let him go."

The boy next to her gently patted her on the back. He didn't know what to say. But maybe just being with her would be enough. He would be strong for her like she had been for him.

Kagome suddenly sat up and shook her head. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't just dump my sad memories on you like that."

"I don't mind." Inuyasha took her hands in his. "After all you've done for me it's the least I can do."

Kagome nodded, then grinned a little as she watched Kichiro searching through the tall grass, then try to pounce on a bug.

"Just make sure you stop him before he tries to hand me anymore slugs."

...

The next day the group set out once again for the territory of Koga's tribe. After leaving Kichiro walking with Ayame Koga ran up to Inuyasha and Kagome. The hanyou growled a little and moved closer to Kagome out of habit, then took a breath. "Yeah?"

"I just wanted to say that I don't want either of you interfering in this fight." The wolf prince put his hands behind his head. "I have to do this myself if I'm going to be alpha again."

"Keh, you get killed we still need that jewel shard." Inuyasha snorted. "But I guess we can let you do all of the work this time."

Kagome was about to scold Inuyasha for his rudeness when she tripped over a root in her path. As she fell face-first towards the ground she suddenly felt strong hands holding her up and setting her on her feet.

"You okay?" Inuyasha asked. When she nodded he continued. "Be more careful."

While such an incident might have seemed like nothing to others, to Kagome it was much more. Usually in a situation like that Inuyasha would have been much more insulting than a mild "Be more careful." He'd have called her a clumsy idiot at the very least. But now he was working to keep his temper in check, at least where she was concerned.

It was amazing to her how one of the most powerful beings in the world, who could lift boulders and tear steel like it was paper, who was practically indestructible and thought a hole in his chest was no big deal, who could level entire cities if he felt like it, was worried about her feelings. Just thinking about it made her appreciate Inuyasha's restraint all the more.

'He may be rough around the edges, but in fact he shows a lot of restraint. All of his life he's run from the humans who abused him, when he could have killed them all..."

A hand waved in front of her face brought Kagome back to reality. Inuyasha was sniffing the air, and around her the wolves were all doing the same.

"What is it?" She looked around before something wet dripped onto her shoulder. She wiped it off and held her hand in front of her face to see what it was.

'Blood?'

She looked up and gasped at the grizzly sight. Three wolf youkai hung in the trees above them, branches piercing their bodies to hold them in place. One was impaled through the neck, another through the chest, and a third was hanging upside down with two branches through his stomach. Blood dripped from their wounds, creating a red rain beneath them.

Kagome felt Inuyasha pull her aside as he growled. Meanwhile Koga had Ginta cover Kichiro's eyes even though he new the little wolf could still smell the blood.

"Who...why?" Kagome managed to stammer after a moment. "Naraku?"

"No...my Grandfather." Koga hissed. "They must have opposed him." He sat on the ground in disgust. "As if our tribe hadn't been depleted enough. Inuyasha, help me. They deserve better than this."

Inuyasha nodded, jumping up and grabbing the wolf impaled through the neck down. He laid the lifeless body on the ground, then went back for the next as Koga went for the one hanging upside down.

"I'm sorry..."

The corpse suddenly opened his eyes, grabbing Koga's wrist. Koga nearly fell out of the tree before steadying himself. "This one's alive! Help me get him down!"

...

"Can't you do anything?"

Kagome shook her head as she washed the blood from her hands. "I'm sorry." She said sadly. "He's lost too much blood and his stomach has been punctured. He'd already going septic."

Koga growled, clenching his fists. "His name is Jinsoku. I've known him since I was a cub..." He shook his head. "I know all three of them. Maybe that's why they were targeted, because of me."

"It's not your fault." Kagome gently put her hand on his shoulder. "At least we can give them a proper burial."

Koga looked over to where Jinsoku lay, wrapped in a blanket. He was still breathing, but was clearly losing the fight. Behind him Inuyasha was finishing up with digging a third grave. The wolf prince walked over to the dying wolf and knelt.

"Koga..." Jinsoku gasped. "You...you're really here...?"

"Of course I am." Koga tried to smirk. "And I have recovered the Goraishi." He summoned the claws with an act of will.

"It's real...?" With great effort Jinsoku lifted his head up.

"It is." Koga held it up close so he could see. "I swear I will kill my Grandfather for what he has done to our people."

"He has gone mad...with power." Jinsoku said before collapsing into a coughing fit that left bloody foam all over his chest. "You...you have to stop him... He speaks of war...on all other youkai...and on...humans..."

Koga grabbed Jinsoku's hand. "I swear to you, our people will rise again once I've killed him. We will no longer be monsters, but a true civilization again."

The wolf smiled, then laid back and closed his eyes.

...

After burying the three murdered wolves the group continued on. The mood was somber, no one feeling much like talking. Kagome thought Inuyasha seemed to be taking it particularly hard. He was slowing down, almost to the point that the wolves could keep up with him when he carried her on his back.

"Hey?" She patted him on the shoulder. "You okay?"

Inuyasha shrugged and set her down as they reached the edge of the forest. Ahead of them were the caves of Koga's tribe.

"So what now?" Inuyasha said as the wolves caught up with the two of them. "Do we just fight our way to the alpha?"

"Doesn't look like we'll have too." Koga pointed into the distance. A group of male wolf youkai were running towards them, led by a miniature whirlwind. It stopped in front of them, revealing a wolf youkai who somewhat resembled Koga. He looked to be in his early forties in human years, and was somewhat taller and more muscular than his grandson. Kagome could sense a jewel shard in his neck.

"You dare show your face to me?" The alpha demanded. "And you bring humans and a half-breed to defile our sacred territory?"

"Shut up old man!" Koga growled. "You stole my title and murdered our people, and now you will pay."

"You are weak!" The alpha sneered. "Under your rule our tribe faced slaughter after slaughter. If I had still been alpha I'd have killed the half breed and the miko, and taken their jewel shards for myself!"

"You can try it you mangy wolf!" Inuyasha yelled, but made no move to attack the alpha. No, this was Koga's fight.

"Do you dare to face me one on one?" Koga summoned the Goraishi, causing the alpha and his wolves to step back for a moment before the alpha regained his composure.

"So, you have the Goraishi. I will claim it for myself after a leave your broken body for the crows." He flashed a sadistic grin. "Just like I did your father."

With a snarl, Koga lept at the older wolf.

Kagome watched as the two wolf youkai fought, bow at the ready in case one of the alpha's followers tried anything. They were both moving so fast it was hard for her to track them. Instead she would only see flashes, like a flickering picture. Koga slashing at his Grandfather with the Goraishi, the older wolf dodging Koga's blows and landing a kick that sent Koga flying, Koga jumping back up as his Grandfather tried to pounce on him. When both wolves paused it was clear that each had landed a few blows, but neither was about to give in. In moments they were back at it, snarling and growling like beasts.

"You disgrace our kind!" The alpha shouted as he dodged the lightning from the Goraishi. "You want to taint our bloodline with half breeds! Just like your father!"

"My father loved a woman and didn't care that she was human!" Koga shouted back as he slashed at the alpha. "But you were too afraid of change to accept that! I only wish I'd had the courage to stand up to you a long time ago!"

"And I wish I had killed you along with your half breed sister!" The alpha replied before howling as the Goraishi cut him across the chest, opening up five deep gashes. He fell back and glared at Koga, eyes blazing with hate.

"You can't beat me old man." Koga held the bloody claws before him. "Your single jewel shard is no match for the Goraishi."

The alpha charged at him, but it was becoming clear that Koga held the advantage. If he got to close he risked the Goraishi's claws, while trying to hit and run only exposed him to the lighting shooting from the silvered tips. As the battle went on he was cut more and more, and they began to take their toll.

"You might be right cub." The older wolf hissed and spat out blood. "But I'm still smarter than you." He turned his head and glared at Inuyasha and Kagome standing near the edge of the cliffs running against the wolf dens, before delivering a massive punch to the ground.

Inuyasha had no time to react. In a split-second the ground underneath Kagome and himself collapsed and sent the both of them tumbling down the cliff.

"NO!" Koga ran to the edge of the cliff, hoping desperately to see them holding onto an outcropping or stray root. But before he could even look the alpha rammed his elbow into the wolf prince's spin, sending him tumbling to the ground. He then pounced on Koga, his right hand holding Koga's own by the Goraishi off to the side, while his left closed around Koga's throat.

Koga kicked and struggled, but was rapidly losing air. Sparkles formed behind his eyes, and he knew that meant he was close to passing out.

"Once I have the Goraishi no one will stand against me!" The alpha roared in triumph. "I'll kill all who followed you!"

He leaned in close to Koga until their faces were almost touching. "And you called yourself alpha. But I have proven who is the strongest here."

Koga's right hand suddenly jerked, and the alpha felt himself pushed back. Looking down he was astounded to see Koga's right hand punching through his stomach. He hadn't accounted on Koga being able to dismiss the Goraishi while his Grandfather held it, freeing his right hand, then immediately summoning the claws back to take advantage of the older wolf's open vital spot.

Koga stood, pulling his Grandfather up and setting the older wolf on his knees. He held the alpha by the neck with his left hand while pulling his right and the Goraishi free. The older wolf sneered as blood ran from his mouth.

"No Grandfather." The wolf prince stared into his elder's eyes. "Inuyasha and Kagome were stronger than you or me. In ways you would never understand." With one swift uppercut the claws of the Goraishi entered below the wolf's jaw and came out at the top of his skull.

Koga let the body fall, then turned to the fallen alpha's followers. He held the bloody the Goraishi claws-up before him. "Who else dares challenge me?"

The wolves fell to their knees, baring their necks to the true alpha.

...

'I'm...I'm alive?'

Kagome opened her eyes, seeing the cliff above her. For a few seconds she could only stare in awe before deciding to try moving.

'Okay...so far so good.' She thought as she wiggled her toes. 'At least I'm not paralyzed.' Taking a breath and bracing for pain, she tried sitting up.

The first thing she noticed was she was remarkably uninjured. After briefly checking herself she found blood coming from her forehead, and felt a little sting when touching there. A shallow cut, probably a small, sharp rock falling on her.

The second thing she noticed was she was laying on something soft.

Something...red.

"Inuyasha!"

Kagome quickly rolled off of him. He had broken her fall, taking the full force of the impact for her.

"Inuyasha, are you alive?!"

The hanyou opened his eyes. "I...maybe..."

Kagome looked around for her backpack, cursing when she realized it must still be at the top of the cliff. One look told her how bad this was. Inuyasha's left arm was splayed at an unnatural angle that could only mean multiple fractures. His left foot was turned almost completely around. And that was only what she could see. He had to have internal injuries too.

"I tried to catch you." Inuyasha said. "Wasn't fast enough...forgot it had been a month since the last one." He used his right hand to point at the darkening sky.  
Kagome followed his gaze, horror filling her as she realized what he meant.

It was the new moon.

...

Koga got Kagome's backpack and had Inuyasha carried back to the den, then sent for all of the clan's elders to do what they could. But nothing seemed to help. As sunset approached Inuyasha lay on a mat of straw in a cave, growing weaker and weaker as Kagome held his hand.

"You idiot!" She yelled through her tears. "Why didn't you tell me?!"

"Sorry..." He mumbled. "My fault..."

Kagome squeezed his hand. "You just have to make it to morning Inuyasha. Just hold on."

"Can't..."

"Yes you can! You can and you will!" Kagome pleaded. Koga, Ayame, and the healers had stepped back, wanting to give the girl and her dying friend their space. "I just got you back! I am **not** losing you again!"

"Kagome." Inuyasha opened his eyes. "Sorry...thought I'd have more time to...say this..." He coughed, blood spattering his chest.

"Love...you..."

"Inuyasha, please don't go..."

The hanyou sighed as the sun slipped below the horizon. His hair turned dark and his ears moved to the side of his head, reshaping themselves into a more human-like shape.

He breathed once, then was still.

"Inuyasha?" Kagome shook him.

"Inuyasha please!"

Koga slowly approached as Kagome threw herself upon Inuyasha's lifeless body.

"Kagome, I'm so sorry."

"NO!" She grabbed the jewel from her neck and jammed it into a cut on Inuyasha's neck. "You are **not** dying! You hear me?!"

"Kagome no!"

But Koga was too late. Inuyasha took a deep breath, his eyes snapping open and turning from brown to golden. His hair turned silvery-white and his ears turned back to their familiar canine form.

"Inuyasha...?" Kagome whispered as the hanyou took another breath. His mangled limbs twisted, bones snapping back into their proper place and fusing back together. His chest began to quickly rise and fall as power surged through him.

"Everyone get back!" Kagome yelled as Inuyasha's eyes turned red while his fangs and claws grew longer. Magenta stripes decorated his cheeks as she held him, pink light coming from her.

"It's okay Inuyasha." She told him in the tone a mother would use to soothe an upset child. "I'm here for you."

Inuyasha growled, but made no move to attack her. This female...she was familiar.

'Mate?'

"Everyone out of the cave!" Kagome yelled again. "Don't come back until sunup!"

The feral youkai watched as the wolves left, instinct telling him to hunt and kill. But an even stronger urge told him he had to stay with the strange girl. His mate. He held onto her as the urge to kill faded.

'Kagome?'

Yes, that was her name. Kagome. His Kagome.

He was with his Kagome now, and everything was going to be fine.

...

"I can't believe you would do something so stupid!"

"What choice did I have?" Kagome yelled at him as they began to journey back home underneath the rising sun. The jewel once again hung at her neck.

"I could have killed you!" Inuyasha grabbed her arms. "Don't you understand that?!"

"But you didn't." She looked to her feet. "I just...I panicked okay?"

Inuyasha rolled his eyes and let her go. He sighed and crossed his arms. "Hell, I don't know if I should be mad or grateful. I'm both at once."

"Fine with me as long as you're alive." Kagome placed her hand on his chest. "I never want to lose you again. If you died..." She looked up at him with tears in her eyes. "Inuyasha, you mean the world to me."

"Don't you get it? You mean the world to me?" Inuyasha hugged her to him. "I'd never forgive myself if I hurt you."

Kagome was closed her eyes, then suddenly felt herself pulled behind him. "Inuyasha?"

The hanyou growled, sniffing the air before pulling out the Tessiaga.

"Kagura."

Kagome quickly readied an arrow, looking all around for the feather the wind sorceress rode.

"No need for that."

Naraku's spawn stepped from behind a tree. "Put your weapons away. I'm not here to attack you."

Inuyasha kept pivoting, keeping between Kagura and Kagome. "Bullshit. What's Naraku got planned this time?"

"That's why I'm here." Kagura said. "I'm here because I've run out of time and options. I would have contacted you sooner had you not been around those wolves."

She paused. "Naraku is dying, and he plans to take the world with him."


	22. Reflections

Chapter 22: Reflections

_Sessomaru had not expected to end up here again._

_He had been watching Rin play, as he often did these last few months, when his mother had appeared before him. As was her way she ignored Jaken and the human girl, instead saying she had come to inform her son that Inuyasha had been taken as a slave by a gang of humans, then rescued by his friends. When Sesshomaru asked her why she had told him this, or why he should care, she had simply smirked._

_"I merely wished to see what my son has to rival his half-brother's companions." She had shaken her head. "A dragon, an imp, and a little girl. Is that truly the best you can do?"_

_Sesshomaru had said nothing as she turned from him. "Your father was a great leader Sesshomaru. If you truly wish to follow in his footsteps, you must learn what made him one. Inuyasha already understands, and will one day surpass you unless you understand as well." And then she had left._

_And so, the previous morning Sesshomaru left Rin with Jaken and Ah-Un, then did something he swore he would never do again. He went to his father's remains._

_He stood before them and thought, all through the day and night. He thought upon his father, upon himself, upon Inuyasha, and upon Rin._

_His father and he had been very different. Even he had to admit that. While he was quiet and controlled, his father was loud and uninhibited. They had often argued, with Sesshomaru unable to understand why his father told him to show mercy to those weaker than himself._

_Was it as simple as that? Inuyasha was more like their father than he was? Was that what he was supposed to understand?_

_No, no that couldn't be it. There had to be more too it than that._

_Sesshomaru thought further on the subject of his father. He had always resented his father's choices. Marrying a human, fathering a hanyou, giving that hanyou his prized sword while he received a lesser blade (though one that had admittedly proven quite useful in very specific circumstances)._

_But now, for the first time, he asked himself **why** his father had made those choices._

_Rin was a human, like his father's mate. Yet Sesshomaru valued Rin's life. He would be unhappy if she were to die._

_Perhaps...his father had felt something similar for his human mate?_

_But what did that make Inuyasha? Before now Sesshomaru would have chosen to ignore this train of thought. But he had resolved not to leave his father's bones until he understood what had made his father a great leader._

_As the sun had set Sesshomaru finally admitted something to himself. Something he really did not want to acknowledge, but had known all along._

_His father had valued Inuyasha. But why? He was a half-breed. Even ignoring the shame of human blood in their line, Inuyasha would never be as strong as his full youkai relatives. He would always be weak, always need to be taken care of._

_Taken care of...like he took care of Rin._

_But then again, was Inuyasha really so weak? Inuyasha had won his share of their battles. And Inuyasha, not he, had avenged their father by slaying Ryūkotsusei._

_Inuyasha had done what he had been afraid to do. Inuyasha had already surpassed their father in raw power._

_Inuyasha had already surpassed him by drawing powerful companions to himself, while Sesshomaru was the only one of his group who fought._

_How was that possible? He was a lowly half-breed. How could he surpass the Lord of The Western Lands?_

_And for the first time in his life, Sesshomaru began to doubt himself._

_'What if,' He thought. 'What if it's not something he possesses, but something I lack? What if **I** am flawed?'_

...

Kagome had been through a lot this month. She had almost lost Inuyasha to that slaver. She had taken Inuyasha's pain onto herself to find him. Then she had believed him lost forever to his youkai side, with only Kikyo's sacrifice bringing him back. Afterwards she had been left with a timid, frightened boy who needed her and her family to help him get back to himself.

But that had only been the beginning. She had been almost overwhelmed with guilt, blaming herself for what happened to Inuyasha and for all of those sits. She had been harder on herself than ever before, questioning if she was in fact nothing but a mean-spirited bully. Inuyasha's personality leaking into her mind had made her rough and aggressive towards her friends, and led her to humiliate Koga. That had led to them following Koga to his tribe's burial grounds, and having to face the three trials that had led her to further doubt herself. Then to top it off she had almost lost Inuyasha once again, with only the quick use of the jewel saving his life.

But now as she held onto Inuyasha's back as he ran through the forest, Koga at their side, she knew that what lay ahead would be her greatest trial of all.

Together, they had to save the world.

...

_Kagome looked from Inuyasha to Kagura. After using the jewel to keep him alive through the night of the new moon, holding him so her aura purified and keep him sane, she wasn't about to loose him to what was probably a trap. "Naraku is dying? How?"_

_"He can't hold himself together." The wind sorceress explained. "He's absorbed too many youkai into himself too quickly, using the jewel's power to subdue them into his body, and now without it he's coming apart. Pretty soon he'll to just...break apart into a horde of youkai and no longer exist."_

_Inuyasha glared at Kagura, the Tessaiga still pointed at her. "Say we believe you, how is Naraku going to destroy the world?"_

_Kagura smirked at that. "I have to admit, it is quite a plan. He believes that all of the world's volcanoes are connected to a central source, deep beneath the ground."_

_"He's right." Kagome said. "But what does that have to do with anything?"_

_"Do you know of Mt. Fuji?" Kagura asked. "There is a cave on the slopes, and within that cave rests an ancient youkai with power over the volcano. Naraku believes he can absorb this youkai, then before he dies use it's powers to cause every volcano is the world to erupt at the same time. He thinks this will end the world."_

_Kagome quickly ran through in her head what she knew about volcanoes from school and TV. She knew that some, like the Yellowstone or Indonesian super volcanoes, could scour continents of life on their own. But if all of them blew at once... she paled at that. "He-he's right. It'd be a nuclear winter."_

_Inuyasha raised an eyebrow at that. "A what? Don't tell me you're actually buying any of this?"_

_Kagome shook her head. "I'll explain it to you later." She looked back to Kagura. "But why are you telling us this?"_

_"I don't want to die anymore than you do." Kagura crossed her arms. "And I want to be free of that bastard." She turned to leave. "I've already told your friends. They're on the way."_

_"Hold it!" Inuyasha growled. "Where are you going?"_

_Kagura rolled her eyes. "I doubt you want to be seen with me when you go tell the wolves about Naraku's plan. Besides, I have someone else to warn..."_

...

"So you're saying it would be the end of life on Earth?" Koga asked as he ran alongside Inuyasha. He had just finished taking a tally of who was left alive, who his grandfather had killed, and who was unaccounted for (which unfortunately included Kichiro's mother, his sister), when Inuyasha and Kagome had come running back to get him.

Kagome nodded as she held onto Inuyasha. "The clouds of ash and smoke will block out the sun, killing all plant life. It will be winter for decades, everyone who doesn't freeze to death will starve."

"Damn it." Koga hissed as he ran. "I would be pissed that you let the wind bitch escape, but much as I hate to admit it, this is more important than revenge." He summoned the Goraishi. "But once this is over, she's dead!"

...

"Are you sure we can trust Kagura?" Miroku asked as he rode on Kirara's back with Sango, heading for the mountain in the distance. Already he could see dark clouds forming around it.

"No, but I don't think she wants to die." The slayer replied before brightening up a little. "Maybe...maybe once Naraku is dead Kohaku will be himself again?"

Miroku nodded. "I hope so. He deserves to be free. And so do you." He slowly reached his hand around her, holding her belly.

Kirara flew towards the volcano, landing in front of a large cave that the dark clouds were pouring out of. As they watched a bird flew through the cloud, then fell dead.

"Stay back!" Miroku covered his mouth as he hopped off of the fire cat. "That's Naraku's miasma, but worse then ever!"

Sango's head was swimming even after she put on her mask to block the fumes. "We need Kagome to purify it!"

"I'm afraid you will be dead long before the miko gets here."

The three of them spun around upon hearing Naraku's voice. Behind them stood the evil hanyou, his face hidden by the white baboon pelt. In less than a moment he sprouted a nest of tentacles, then attacked.

...

The Lord of The Western Lands bowed before his father's corpse as the morning sun shone behind him. Looking back upon his actions was far more difficult than he thought it would be.

He had decided not to follow his father to the battle with Ryūkotsusei, instead abandoning him. His father had died in that battle...

His father's death was his fault. The realization hit him like a punch to the gut.

Wanting the Tessaiga had been purely about his bruised ego. He had wanted it solely because it was Inuyasha's. And that had cost him an arm, in a fight he started. In fact, he had initiated every battle with his younger half-brother. Inuyasha had never sought him out. It had always been him.

"Father." Sesshomaru knelt as he looked up at the massive skeleton. "Am I...a disappointment to you? Is that why you favored Inuyasha? All this time, have I only been envious of him?"

What if his father had been seen something in Inuyasha that his first-born son did not posses? A strength that Sesshomaru couldn't see? One that had drawn powerful companions to Inuyasha? What if he had given up on the son who had rejected everything he had tried to teach him and instead chose to embrace the younger as his second chance?

"Perhaps..." Sesshomaru began. "I should have listened when you tried to teach me all of those years ago. Maybe then I would have understood. Your love for Izayoi didn't weaken you. It made you stronger. I see that now. She did not cause you to die by Ryūkotsusei's claws, nor did Inuyasha...I did. I know I can never truly atone...I do not deserve to atone. But I must try. I will protect Rin, and I will protect Inuyasha."

He suddenly clutched at the stump of his left arm as it began to burn. With a cry of agony and amazement he watched as a new arm pushed it's way out of the stump, holding a gleaming sword. He was so shocked he almost failed to notice the large feather flying down towards him, carrying Kagura.

...

Sango jumped to catch her hiraikotsu, dodging one of Naraku's tentacles as she did so. Nearby Kirara clawed and bit at the tentacles, while Miroku lashed out with his staff and sutras as hell wasps swarmed around them. But try as they might, more tentacles seemed to spring up as fast as the three of them could cut them down.

"This isn't working!" Sango yelled before getting an idea. "Cover me!" She shouted to the monk before dropping her hiraikotsu and running straight towards Naraku.

"Sango!" Miroku yelled as he threw sutras before her, clearing a path.

The slayer dodged the tentacles, weaving and running around some and jumping over others. Naraku saw her reach into a pouch at her side and throw something at him.

"Foolish girl." He laughed, stepping to the side. "Those smoke bombs can't harm me."

He almost thought he caught a smirk on her face, then saw her make a movement with her other hand before he felt pain in his chest.

Looking down, he saw a knife sticking out of him.

"I just needed you to lower your guard for a moment." The slayer panted. "Good thing I didn't waste that poisoned blade on Inuyasha."

Naraku grasped the knife in both hands and attempted to pull it out, then suddenly collapsed to the ground. His body quickly shirveled up, leaving behind a wooden doll with a hair wrapped around it.

"A puppet?" Miroku looked around as three more of Naraku's puppets appeared from within the cave, heading for them. He raised is staff, prepared to at least die fighting...

"WIND SCAR!"

Lines of lightning shot out from the Tessaiga, incinerating one of the puppets and most of the hell wasps. Koga jumped at another and rammed the Goraishi through it's head. The third was hit by one of Kagome's arrows, instantly disintegrating it.

Kagome!" Sango ran to her friend. "You made it!"

The young miko readied another arrow, firing it into the cave and clearing away the miasma in a flash of light. The mouth of the cave stood cleared before them, leading into the heart of the volcano.

"This ends today." Kagome said calmly. "Today Naraku pays for all that he's done."

"Damn right!" Inuyasha agreed, rushing in first.

...

Together Kagome, Inuyasha, Sango, Miroku, Koga, and Kirara walked through the dark cave. Kagome held her flashlight from the wolf tomb before her so she and the two other humans could see, while their youkai and hanyou companions walked on the sides and used their sensitive ears and noses to keep watch for danger.

"I don't like this." Koga thought out loud. "Where are the hordes of youkai? Where are more of those puppets?"

Miroku nodded, holding a sutra in front of him. "I agree, this seems too easy."

"Well Kagura did say he was dying." Kagome replied as Inuyasha sniffed the air. "Maybe those puppets were the last of his power?"

Inuyasha suddenly held out his hand. "Hold it. I smell something. Something dead."

He pointed ahead of them to what looked like a bundle of clothes.

"There."

Kagome shined her flashlight on it. Her heart sank as the beam illuminating pale skin and a blade made of bone attached to a chain.

'Oh no.'

"Kohaku!"

Before they could stop her Sango ran to her brother, dropping to her knees and lifting him into her arms.

"Kohaku! Kohaku please answer me!" She cradled him, praying, hoping, begging him to not be dead.

Inuyasha and Miroku hung their heads while Kagome clutched at her chest. Koga, though he did not know the slayer that well, still knew enough to be silent.

"No...no please!" She sobbed and rocked him.

"He...he doesn't have a jewel shard." Kagome sniffled as the three men remained silent, letting Sango express her grief. It was clear what had happened. Naraku had removed Kohaku's jewel shard and discarded him like trash. "Sango, I'm so sorry."

The slayer rocked her brother's lifeless body as Kirara slowly approached her, whining softly. The fire cat nuzzled her, offering what comfort she could.

"Sango."

The heartbroken girl looked over her shoulder at Miroku. The monk had come up behind her and placed a hand on her shoulder. "We can only avenge him now."

Sango wiped her eyes and nodded. She kissed Kohaku's forehead, then gently and carefully laid him back down.

"I promise you...you won't lay here." She ran her hand through his dark hair. "I will bury you at our village, next to mother and father."

With one last look to the sad little corpse, Sango stood and rejoined the group. Kagome gave her a quick hug, while Inuyasha stood still, having no idea what to do or say. He still wasn't great with other people's emotions, even though he had been getting better.

"Let's go."

Sango's sharp tone snapped Inuyasha out of his thoughts. He nodded and led the way.

 

 

 


	23. Inferno

**Hey there, anyone remember me? Well I'm back, with the final chapter of When I Almost Lost You. I'm still amazed how many views and review this story has gotten, especially considering it started out as a short five chapter story. I just want to thank all of you for being patient and putting up with my uneven upload schedule and long periods between chapters.**

Chapter 23: Inferno

Not a word was said as the group continued on in the darkness. Each had his or her weapon at the ready, expecting an ambush or trap at any moment. This, they all knew, would be the end. They would either defeat Naraku, or the world would die.

It wasn't long before the group arrived in a vast open chamber with an orange light that seemed to come from the ground. Kagome shut off her flashlight and saw that, except for a large stone island in the center and a small land bridge leading from the entrance of the chamber to the stone island, the chamber was a vast lava lake. And on that island stood five more figures in white baboon pelts, more of Naraku's puppets, alongside a smaller figure she recognized as Kanna. And behind the six, a dark figure stood facing the massive lava lake. Kagome could sense the single jewel shard within him.

"Naraku!"

Inuyasha ran towards the island, only to be slammed to the ground with a force far greater than any of her sits.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome ran to help him. She held her breath, then let it out after a few moment as he began to move.

"Naraku you coward!" The hanyou shouted as he stood.

The five puppets suddenly turned as one, along with Kanna, to stare at the intruders. Their master, on the other hand, made no move to face them.

"You cannot get past my barrier." Kanna said in her emotionless voice. "Soon everyone in the world will die." Her pale eyes shifted to the jewel hanging from Kagome's neck.

"Unless..."

Kagome wrapped her hand around the jewel. "Never." She placed her free hand in the barrier, willing all of her power into it. Naraku's young spawn almost managed a surprised look as the barrier buckled under Kagome's power.

"Impossible." Kanna clutched her mirror, pouring more of her own power into the barrier. Even Sango, who had no mystical abilities, could feel the massive tug-of-war of energies as Kagome and Kanna each sought to overpower the other.

"Don't just stand there! Help her!" Inuyasha shouted to his friends as he began pounding on the barrier with the Tessaiga.

Miroku nodded and threw a sutra onto the barrier, while Koga shot lighting from the Goraishi into the barrier and Sango pounded it with her hiraikotsu. As it buckled Kanna grimaced, blood beginning to run from her nose and eyes from the strain.

"You're not getting away this time Naraku!" Kagome yelled and with a last surge of power the barrier shattered.

Kanna sank to her knees and fell to one side, out cold.

Before she could stop him Inuyasha ran forwards, only to be blocked by one of Naraku's puppets. As he cut it down the other four moved towards his friends.

"DIE NARAKU!" He shouted and unleashed a windscar at the evil hanyou-

Only to stare in shock as it had no visible effect.

"Didn't your master teach you animals don't talk?"

Naraku slowly stood, finally turning to face him, and even Inuyasha hesitated when he saw his archenemy.

His flesh was black as obsidian, with tiny trickles of glowing orange magma running through it like blood. His eyes were gone, replaced by smoldering embers. He had no legs, only a mass of tendrils that writhed in constant motion.

They were too late. Naraku has absorbed the youkai of the volcano into himself.

With a growl, Inuyasha jumped to attack.

...

A ball of light flew from the sky, setting down in front of the cave. It quickly dimmed and split into two figures, Kagura and Sesshomaru.

"I did not expect you to be so eager to stop him." Kagura looked on as the lord of the western lands held his new sword before him, burning through Naraku's miasma and clearing out the tunnel.

"This Sesshomaru would rather not live in a desolate wasteland." He replied, sheathing the blade.

"Is that the only reason?" The wind sorceress asked, moving a step closer to him. "You aren't acting like someone only interested in self-preservation. You have someone to protect? Is it that little girl?"

Sesshomaru began to walk into the cave, not looking at her. "This Sesshomaru might ask you the same."

"I want to be free from Naraku." Kagura shrugged and followed him. "He still has my heart. Even after telling me to leave and spend the last few hours of my life however I wished he refused to give it too me."

"And your sister?" He asked. "What of her?"

Kagura placed her hands behind her head. "Kanna? She'll be free to do whatever she pleases once I return her heart to her."

"That is not what I meant." Sesshomaru sniffed the air. "Do you wish to protect her? Would you be willing to give up something you care about to do so?"

"The only thing I care about is my freedom." Kagura huffed. "I'm not weak enough to become attached to someone like that. I am the wind. I go where I please and do as I will." She paused as she almost ran into him.

"Why'd you stop?"

She followed Sesshomaru's gaze down upon the little form in front of him. It didn't take a dog youkai's nose to determine it was a corpse.

"That bastard!"

"You knew this boy?" Sesshomaru asked as Kagura got to her knees to check his pulse, even though she knew it was futile.

"He's some slayer kid Naraku killed and brought back to life with a jewel shard." She sighed, standing. "I was hoping he would live. He deserved better than this."

Sesshomaru nodded. "He traveled with me for a time as well." He withdrew Tensaiga.

"Indeed, he deserves better."

...

Inuyasha struggled as the flaming tentacles held him fast. While his fire rat clothing provided some protection even they couldn't completely block the levels of heat Naraku was putting out. Out of the corner of his eye he could see his friends fighting Naraku's puppets, who were keeping them away from the real Naraku.

The evil hanyou clearly wanted time to gloat before killing him.

"I'm disappointed." Naraku chuckled, his breath sending out waves of shimmering heat that distorted the air. "I was hoping for a challenge."

"Ha! You always run when I get close!" Inuyasha sneered as he pulled against Naraku. "You'd rather torture a helpless victim than have a fair fight!"

"True." Naraku agreed, forming his hand into an obsidian blade that gleamed in the orange glow of the lava. "Your master told me you're afraid of the dark now, so I think I'll start with your eyes..."

Inuyasha kicked out with both feet into Naraku's chest, ignoring the burning pain and tearing the tentacles enough to allow himself just enough room to break free. He rolled as he fell, grabbing the Tessaiga from where it had fallen and slashing at his foe. Naraku blocked with his obsidian blade, his face a demonic grin.

"You can't win. " He hissed, forcing Inuyasha backwards. "Even without the jewel I can crush you."

"Yeah, then why don't you?" Inuyasha retorted as he pushed back. "Kagura told us all about you. We know you're dying."

Naraku swiped at his foe with a flaming tendril. "One of my only regrets is creating that bitch. The other..." He smirked. "Is not taking Kikyo for myself when I had the chance."

"Kikyo is dead."

Inuyasha took advantage of the moment of shock the news caused Naraku to move past his guard, cutting him in half with the Tessaiga. As he expected the evil hanyou immediately began to fuse back together, but for a moment Inuyasha could see odd, tentacled growths form under Naraku's skin, and even an eyeball within the cut that bisected him.

"So it's true." Inuyasha cut him again, severing an arm. "You're breaking apart." He began to hack away at Naraku, sending chunks of him flying just as fast as he could regenerate. More and more odd growths began to appear, forming into eyes, mouths, and even whole limbs.

Suddenly a tentacle wrapped around Inuyasha, tossing him against the rock wall. He was stunned long enough for Naraku to pull himself together. Naraku made a hand motion and said something in a language that Inuyasha didn't recognize. Instantly thick chains of obsidian sprung from the rock wall, binding Inuyasha's arms at his sides. As he struggled Naraku slowly approached him, a ball of fire in his hand.

"They say that burning alive is the worst, most painful way to die." He held the fire close to Inuyasha, so close he could smell his hair starting to smolder. "I can tell you that it's true." He pulled back the fireball, holding it in both hands and making it grow larger until it was big enough to consume both of them.

"Farewell Inuyasha. I look forward to our meeting in hell."

Naraku suddenly gasped, letting the fireball dissipate in the air. Looking down, he saw a sword stick out from his chest.

"Sesshomaru!" He hisses as the lord of the western lands withdrew his blade. As the two began to fight Kohaku descended with Kagura on her feather, then ran up and began to cut Inuyasha free.

"I thought you were dead!" Inuyasha said as he struggled.

The boy only shook his head and cut through the last of the obsidian. "I'll explain later. I have to go help my sister."

Nodding he understood, Inuyasha grabbed Tessaiga and jumped back into the fight.

...

Sango tasted blood in her mouth as Naraku's puppet stood over her. It's tentacles held her fast, unable to move. Looking over she saw Miroku fall as well. None of her other friends, still fighting their own Naraku puppets, were close enough to help.

'So this is how it ends.' She thought. 'Forgive me Kohaku.'

A flash of black and green suddenly flashed across her vision, nearly severing the puppet's head. She felt the tentacles go slack and quickly stood, drawing her sword and cutting the puppet down before turning to her rescuer.

"Kohaku?!" She stared in shock at the boy before her, but he quickly ran towards where Miroku had fallen. Understanding, she grabbed her hiraikotsu. Together they cut down the puppet and pulled the monk to his feet. He swayed a moment, then along with the two siblings went to help their friends.

...

Inuyasha and Sesshomaru hacked at Naraku with their swords, finally able to overcome his regeneration with the both of them attacking at once. Naraku made a last ditch attempt to grab Inuyasha, only for the hanyou to cut both of his arms off and kick him into the lava.

"Good riddance!" He spat in disgust.

"You fool..." Sesshomaru shook his head. "He's not dead."

"What do you..." Inuyasha was cut off as the whole chamber began to shake. The lava surged at both of them, only missing by a hair as they jumped back. The mass of molten rock rapidly cooled and began to shape itself into the crude likeness of a man, though five times as big. It raised one massive fist and swung at Inuyasha and Sesshomaru, knocking them back.

"Just great!" Inuyasha shouted, and prepared to attack.

...

Kagome watched as the puppet she had been fighting turned to ash, dissolving from her purification arrow. Nearby Koga impaled his puppet with the Goraishi. She then saw him turn to Kagura as the wind sorceress cradled the unconscious body of Kanna.

"No time for that!" She grabbed his arm. "Come on!"

Koga gave one last glare at Kagura, then nodded and ran with Kagome towards Inuyasha and Sesshomaru.

...

"Everything you ever fought for never mattered." Naraku hissed as he held both brothers in his massive obsidian fists, their flesh smoldering. "Everyone you love is going to die."

"You're never...going..to win." Inuyasha forced out with the last of his breath as the monster began to crush him.

"Oh, and how do you figure that?" Naraku relaxed his hold enough so Inuyasha could take in another breath to speak.

The hanyou took a deep breath. "You...never really...understood others." Inuyasha gasped. "You can't imagine why someone might...not put themselves above all else."

"I understand that some people are fools." Naraku replied, stepping into the lava and raising his arms to drop the brothers in. "I am not a fool. I took what I wanted and damn the consequences for anyone else even when I was a human."

"And look where that got you. Crippled and stuck in a cave." Inuyasha continued. "You're still that same bandit on the floor of a cave. Even with all of your power, you're no closer to having Kikyo's love than before."

Naraku growled and held Inuyasha to the lava. "I will dip you slowly..."

"And there's one more thing you never understand." Inuyasha said calmly even as his flesh seared.

Naraku lifted him back up. "And that would be?"

"When someone is stalling."

Naraku only had a moment to think on that before howling in pain as one of Kagome's purification arrows tore into his back, disintegrating his tainted obsidian flesh like so much smoke. He dropped the brothers, who were quickly grabbed by Koga and Sango riding on Kirara and deposited safely on solid ground.

"Kagome!" Inuyasha yelled as the wolf prince let him go. "Where's his jewel shard?"

"In his heart!" She replied, readying another arrow. Meanwhile Sesshomaru jumped at Naraku and cut into his shoulder with his sword, quickly followed by Koga using the Goraishi on the other shoulder. As Naraku tried to grab them to pull them off Inuyasha released a windscar that tore into the wounds from Kagome's arrow in the obsidian giant's chest.

"Get him on the ground!" He shouted.

Naraku tore Koga from his shoulder and threw him aside before grabbing Sesshomaru. He squeezed the youkai lord in both hands.

"I'll crush you!" He snarled...

Only to be knocked onto his back by a blow from both Inuyasha and Koga.

"I see it!" Inuyasha yelled as he plunged his hand into the giant's wounded chest, heedless of the extreme heat. A moment later he pulled out the purple jewel fragment.

"Nooooo!" Naraku made a desperate attempt to grab them as they jumped away along with Sesshomaru. His body began to ripple and pulsate.

"No! This cannot be! I won't let it end like this!"

Inuyasha quickly pushed his friends back. "We have to get out of here, I think he's gonna blow!" He looked to Kagome as she walked past him.

"Kagome? What are you doing? Get back here!" He pleaded and moved to grab her.

"No Inuyasha, I have to do this." She said calmly. "I can't leave it to chance. I'm going to make sure he's gone."

Inuyasha hesitated, then nodded that he understood. "Do what you have to do."

Kagome concentrated, summoning the red aura she had first used when binding herself to Inuyasha through the beads to rescue him. As she slowly approached Naraku various insect and vermin youkai broke from his body and moved to attack her. But as soon as they touched her aura they shrieked and turned to ash. As more youkai born from the dying Naraku saw this and tried to flee she expanded her aura, incinerating them as they crawled and slithered away.

Finally she reached Naraku, her aura burning away the layers of obsidian to reveal the squirming mass of corruption beneath before that too began to burn. Naraku tried to crawl away, but was quickly caught and held up by his neck as he shrieked in agony.

"What's she doing?" Koga asked to no one in particular.

Inuyasha didn't take his eyes from Kagome. "I think I know. It's the worst possible thing she could do to him."

Naraku's cries grew louder and louder, and not once did Kagome look away as her aura licked at him like flames. His flesh became charred, one of his eyes withered away, and his limbs hung uselessly at his sides. His screaming died down as her aura faded, until at last she laid the pathetic figure on the ground.

Slowly everyone approached her, still in shock.

"Is he...dead?" Kagura asked, carrying Kanna in her arms.

As if in answer, the corpse-like figure took a shuddering breath.

"No, but he probably wishes otherwise." Kagome stated. "I've purified him. He is no longer a hanyou. He is no longer Naraku. He's just..."

"Onigumo." Inuyasha interrupted her.

Kagome knelt before him. "Onigumo, can you hear me?"

The bandit slowly turned his head to look at her with his one good eye. "Yes..." He gasped, his voice raspy from his burned vocal cords.

"I just want to know one thing." She asked him. "Was it worth it? The lives you took. The families you tore apart. The misery and pain you inflicted for no other reason than because you could."

Onigumo gave her a lip-less grin, revealing his blackened gums. "I could have been a husband for Kikyo. We could have shared the jewel if it weren't for..." He turned his gaze to Inuyasha. "Him."

Inuyasha growled at that.

"If it weren't for him I wouldn't have had to trick Kikyo and she wouldn't have died. I could have just taken the jewel and made her love me. But to answer your question, I wouldn't hesitate to do it all over again."

Kagome stood and shook her head. "You're a pitiful fool Onigumo. We're going to put you back in that cave, this time with wards to prevent you from calling on any youkai. You'll lay alone and unable to move in the dark until the day you die, and after that you have hell to look forward too."

"This is all very interesting..." Kagura stepped forward, holding Kanna in one arm. "But I'm taking back my heart." She knelt before Onigumo and placed her hand on his chest. A moment later she withdrew a glowing red sphere and placed it on her own chest, gasping as it slid in easily.

Onigumo sneered at the wind sorceress. "Kagura, do you remember what you told me about going for the hurt instead of the kill? You were right..."

He summoned a glowing silver sphere into his hand.

"...but going for the hurt is so much more satisfying."

"No!" Kagura tried to grab it, but was a moment too late as his hand closed around it.

In her arms Kanna shuddered, blood pouring out of her open mouth. She opened her eyes and looked to Kagura.

"Sister..." She whispered, before her eyes rolled back in her head.

"Kanna! Kanna!" Kagura shook her.

"No!" Kagome yelled, raising her hand to her mouth. Onigumo began to laugh as Kanna dissolved into nothingness.

"Bastard!" Inuyasha jumped onto him, plunging his claws into the bandit's chest. Onigumo didn't even have time to scream as Inuyasha tore him apart.

"I thought you didn't kill humans?" Koga asked.

Inuyasha stood up and spat on the corpse. "Yeah well, nobody's perfect." Suddenly the entire chamber began to shake, the lava starting to rise.

"Fool! He wanted you to kill him!" Sesshomaru shouted. "His will was the only thing keeping the volcano from erupting!" He held up his sword, holding it in front of him and channeling his strength into a barrier. "Run! I'll hold it back as long as I can!"

"Like hell I'm going to let you do this by yourself!" Inuyasha shouted as he held up Tessaiga next to his brother. "The rest of you, get out of here!"

"Inuyasha!" Kagome tried to run for him, only to be grabbed by Sango and Miroku. Her last glimpse of the brothers was the both of them standing side to side, holding back the lava to give everyone else enough time to escape.

...

The group barely got out of the volcano cave before smoke and lava began to billow from the crater. After running far enough away they turned to look, hoping and praying to see Inuyasha and Sesshomaru.

"Inuyasha..." Kagome held her hands clasp together at her chest. "Please Inuyasha...please come back to me."

Koga placed a hand on her shoulder. "He was very brave." He looked to Kagura, who sat silently crying over her sister. Leaving Kagome, he approached her.

"Have you come to kill me?" She asked him, not looking up.

Koga summoned the Goraishi, then after seeming to consider for a moment dismissed it.

"No, I want you to live with your grief. But if I ever hear of you in the lands of the wolf youkai again, I won't hesitate."

Everyone suddenly looked up at the volcano at a loud bang. A huge white dog flew out of the crater, it's fur burned in several places. Koga moved in front of the humans and summoned the Goraishi once again. "Damn it, what now?"

"No wait!" Kagome pulled his arm down as the giant dog flew towards them. "That's Sesshomaru!"

The dog stopped several feat from the group, then knelt and opened his mouth, Something red and wet tumbled out onto the ground.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome ran and embraced him, not caring that he was covered in dog drool. Sesshomaru transformed back into his humanoid form and began to retch.

"You taste horrible! When's the last time you bathed?"

"It wasn't exactly a picnic for me either!" Inuyasha replied before hugging Kagome, holding her tight as she started to cry.

"It's alright now Kagome." He said, stroking her hair. "It's all going to be okay."

He would hold her as long as she needed. He would be her rock, just as she had been his.

"We're safe now."

**And that's the last chapter! See you at the epilogue!**


	24. Epilogue: One Year Later

Epilogue: One Year Later

Kagome knelt before the grave marker, trying her best to ignore the sounds of traffic around her and the overcast sky above her.

"Hi Dad." She said, smiling a little. "Sorry it's been a while since my last visit."

She reached up, feeling the jewel she wore around her neck. She had decided not to risk a wish on the jewel, as she had a feeling it would go badly. And destroying it wasn't a option either. It had already come back once. It could do so again, and who knows whose hands it might end up in then? In the end Kagome had decided that she would carry the jewel with her at all times, keeping it purified, until a more permanent solution could be found.

"I sometimes wonder what you would say about the choices I've made." She began. "I've always tried to be the kind of person you were. To be kind and generous to others, to be patient with them, to treat them like I'd want to be treated. I know that sometimes I haven't lived up to that standard, but still, I've always believed in the things you taught me."

Kagome thought back to that day a little over a year ago...

...

_"So you want to let her go?"_

_Kagome nodded at Inuyasha's question. She and her friends were gathered in a circle, the setting sun above them, to debated Kagura's fate. Koga had already left, wanting to get back to his tribe to begin the massive effort of rebuilding. "I think she deserves a chance. I know she's done a lot of evil, but don't forget she was created as an adult by Naraku. He was her only teacher, her only source of moral guidance. Can we really hold her accountable for her actions?"_

_Inuyasha looked over his shoulder at the wind sorceress, who stood with Sesshomaru and Kohaku to await their decision, then back to Kagome. "You're saying she's like a little kid? That she doesn't know right from wrong?"_

_"Yeah." Kagome nodded. "I think so. I think she really doesn't."_

_Inuyasha snorted at that. "You know, she did try to kill me."_

_"Some of your best friends tried to kill you when you first met." Kagome quickly reminded him._

_At that Inuyasha looked to Sango and Miroku, then shrugged. "Can't argue with you there. Alright, I vote we let her go."_

_Sango shook her head. "I don't think she deserves that level of trust. She could just be waiting for us to lower our guard. Can we really take that risk?"_

_Miroku placed his hand on her shoulder. "I'm afraid I must agree. No good can come of something spawned by Naraku."_

_Kagome was just about to argue the point when Kohaku approached their small circle. The boy had his head down, and his face held lines that said he had seen things no child should._

_"I...I just want to tell you something I think you should know. About Kagura." He paused._

_Sango moved to embrace him, but Kohaku quickly moved out of her reach._

_"Kohaku?"_

_"Please...please don't." He said sadly. "Sango, I'm sorry. But I can't come with you."_

_"What?" Sango moved to grab him before Miroku's hand on her shoulder held her back. "Of course you're coming with me! I'm going to take care of you!"_

_"Sango..." The boy shook his head. "I can't pretend that everything I did didn't happen. I remember everything, all of it. I know...I know it wasn't my fault. But I can't face you yet. Please, just give me time. Let me figure this out on my own."_

_Sango was silent for a moment, then nodded sadly. "Alright. I hope someday you'll come back to me."_

_Kohaku raised his head, a little hint of a smile. "Thank you. And thank you to the rest of you, for fighting so hard to free me from Naraku. But I wanted to tell you, Kagura fought for me a lot too. She would protect me from Naraku, even when I was his puppet. She isn't all bad."_

_Miroku and Sango looked at each other, then nodded. "Alright, we'll give her a chance." Miroku finally said._

_"One chance." Sango added._

...

Kagome placed her hand on the grave marker. "It hasn't always been easy. Sometimes I still feel so guilty about everything that happened. And then I feel bad for comparing my life to my friends and the tragedies in their lives. Like I'm being selfish. But then I remember something Inuyasha told me his mother told him when he was little. That it's okay to be upset when bad things happen in your life. That isn't being selfish. That's just being human, and it's okay to feel that way sometimes."

She stood up, keeping her eyes on the marker. "I'm sorry, but I can't stay long. Tonight is, well, you know..." She kissed her hand, then touched the marker. "Bye Dad."

...

"K-I-C-H-I-R-O. That spells Kichiro!" The little wolf beamed up at Inuyasha.

"That's right. Nice job." Inuyasha said as he looked at the small chalkboard in the wolf boy's hands before turning his gaze to the next child in the group of about twenty sitting outside of Kaede's home, this one a human girl. "Okay Yukimi, show me how to write your name."

The little girl furrowed her brow in concentration as she copied the characters from memory onto her chalkboard (Kagome had brought back enough for all of them). They were crude, slanted this way and that, but still legible. "Y-U-K-I-M...I?"

"Right, good job." Inuyasha praised her. Some of the students were talking in the back, but a quick look from their teacher quieted them. Everyone knew Inuyasha-sama wasn't fooling around when it was study time.

Inuyasha looked over his shoulder as Kaede came walking up the path, Shippo on her shoulder, followed by Ginta and Hakkaku and some of the village men carrying the dried meat and hides they'd traded with the wolf youkai in exchange for iron tools and technical know-how. The wolves came to the village every two weeks to trade ever since Koga, Alpha of all wolf youkai, had combined the tribes and set down new laws for how they would live and interact with humans. There had been some grumbling from more traditional wolves, but the results of his policies spoke for themselves. Now it looked like the wolf youkai might have a future as something more than beasts.

Inuyasha stood up, turning to tell the class to keep practicing their writing. He went over and took the heavy bundle of furs Kaede had been carrying from her.

"Don't we have enough of these already?"

"We can always use more." The old miko told him as she straightened her back as Shippo hopped off. "The children give you any trouble?"

"Nothing I couldn't handle." He said before directing the villagers to go store the rest of the hides and meat.

Kaede nodded. "Thank you again. Between meetings with the wolves and helping out Miroku and Sango I'd never have the time to teach the children."

Inuyasha shrugged. "It's not that hard. I just do what you and Kagome did to teach me."

The old woman smiled at that. "If I didn't know better, I'd think you enjoy teaching them."

"You're crazy." He crossed his arms, but gave a little smile too.

As they spoke Ginta and Hakkaku had gone to gather up Kichiro and the few other wolf children. As Ginta talked with them Hakkaku went over to Inuyasha and Kaede.

"Kichiro's mother wants him to come back to the dens for a while. Ayame and Koga's cub is due soon and she wants him to be there to meet his little cousin." He said.

Inuyasha looked to Kaede for a moment, then nodded his consent. "Alright, but tell him to keep practicing his writing. I expect him to be just as far along as the rest when he comes back, no excuses."

The wolf nodded in agreement, going to join his pack mate. As it was already late in the day, after saying goodbye to Kichiro Inuyasha told the rest of the small class to head home while he took Shippo over to see how his friends were doing.

...

"I didn't think the boy could be restored to life, since he'd already had his life prolonged with magic."

Sesshomaru did not turn to face his mother, instead keeping his gaze in the distance on Rin as Kohaku showed her how to start a fire on her own. The little girl was trying hard, but couldn't seem to get the flint and steel to spark the kindling. Nearby Kagura sat with Jaken and Ah-un, watching the two young humans.

"Perhaps you underestimated my power." The Lord of The Western Lands replied. He flexed his regrown arm. "Or perhaps I merely wished to prove you wrong for once."

His mother laughed at that. "You really are like your father after all. If someone told him something was impossible, he'd find a way to do it just to spite them." She moved in front of him. "So, how long are you planning to keep the humans?"

"When they are older I will send them to Inuyasha." He told her. "Rin especially needs to live among her own kind."

His mother nodded at that. "And you trust Inuyasha with them? With her?"

Sesshomaru nodded back to her. "I do. He may not be full-blooded, but he can take care of them. They'll be safe with him. And he can teach them of life among humans." He paused. "And I still have some unfinished business with him."

...

_"Wait."_

_The sun was nearly gone, and Sesshomaru was about to leave the slope of the volcano with Kagura and Kohaku at his side, when Inuyasha spoke a single word to pull him back. The Lord of The Western lands had hoped to avoid any awkward talks. He turned to see his half brother, his own companions at his side._

_"Not that I'm not grateful...but why?" Inuyasha asked him. "Why did you save me? Why are you taking them with you?"_

_Sesshomaru sighed. "This Sesshomaru..." He paused for a moment. "I...have recently had some time to think. If our father believed you valuable enough to risk his life, I can not allow his sacrifice to be in vain."_

_Inuyasha raised an eyebrow. "That still doesn't explain..."_

_"It is all the explanation you shall have for now." Sesshomaru turned to leave once again, then added._

_"Take care of yourself Inuyasha. One day I shall tell you about our father. I cannot have you dishonor him by remaining ignorant of your sire."_

...

Inuyasha and Shippo entered through the sliding door, greeting Miroku when he stood and quickly shushed them.

"She's asleep." He whispered. The hanyou and fox youkai quickly quieted down, but it was too late. After a few seconds an angry scream rang out from the other room.

"Oh sweetie, did they wake you up?" They heard Sango say. A few moments later she walked out, carrying a small wrapped baby.

"Sorry." Inuyasha said as Sango sat and held the baby to her. "How is Himiko?"

"She's doing great." Sango replied, letting Shippo jump onto her shoulder to get a closer look at the baby girl. Inuyasha looked away for a moment, causing Miroku to sigh.

"We told you, if you want to hold her you just need to ask."

When Himiko was born Inuyasha had been afraid to even touch her. She was so little, he was worried he would accidentally hurt the newborn. It had taken a lot of coaxing and reassurances, from both Sango and Kagome, that it was going to be okay before he had allowed himself to hold her. Miroku motioned to Sango, who quickly thrust the baby into Inuyasha's arms.

"Hey wait..." The hanyou began, before looking down at the baby's face. Her eyes were open, brown like both of her parents, as she looked curiously at her Uncle Inu.

Inuyasha stared back at her, then after she seemed okay he let his guard down. "Heh, hey runt." He finally said, sitting with her in his lap. Sango grabbed Miroku's hand as they watched Inuyasha hold their daughter.

"She likes you." Shippo piped up. "Or maybe she just thinks your ears are funny-looking."

"You're one to talk tail-boy." Inuyasha fired back, but without any anger in his voice. He looked out through the window at the setting sun, silently cursing to himself.

"I have to go." He handed the baby back to Sango, then stood up and turned to the kitsune before leaving. "Don't forget, sword practice in the morning."

"I won't." Shippo said proudly. "Someday everyone will tell stories of the great warrior Shippo!"

Inuyasha quickly exited the home as Shippo cringed and the baby started crying again.

...

Kagome climbed out of the well, noting the chill in the air. It wasn't spring yet, but it was coming. Soon enough the trees would be green again. Maybe she would go take her friends swimming? They had all been so busy, her with school and Sango and Miroku with their new baby, that they hardly did anything together anymore.

"Hi."

Kagome turned around, seeing the familiar dark-haired boy. As the last ray of sun faded she watched his ears disappear into his head.

"Sorry I'm late." They both said at the same time before smiling. "No, I'm late." They said in unison.

"I was with Sango and Miroku and the baby." Inuyasha explained.

"I was with my father." Kagome told him.

They both shook their heads, then embraced.

"Hey Kagome, I never thanked you, did I?"

"Hmm?" She asked, her head on his chest. "Thank me for what?"

"For everything." He wrapped his arms around her. "For saving me. Saving me in so many ways. You released me from the tree. You saved me from that slave trader. And you saved my life at the wolf's den. Thank you."

Kagome looked up at him, his dark hair almost hidden by the dark of the moonless night. "And thank you Inuyasha. Thank you for saving my life. Thank you for teaching me patience. Thank you for forgiving me."

They stayed like that for a while, until Kagome let him go. "Come on, Momma will be mad if we let our dinner get cold." Inuyasha nodded, and together they headed into the well.

...

That night, as he had many nights since the end of their adventures, Inuyasha lay in Kagome's bed. At first she had needed to hold him as he worked through his trauma, the torture and kidnapping he had gone through. But after a while he began to hold her instead, Kagome pouring out her emotions into his chest. Now though, they held each other, each being strong and accepting comfort in turn. They were each other's rocks, their support against adversity, and nothing would ever tear them apart again.

Before finally closing his eyes and letting sleep claim him, one thought repeated through Inuyasha's mind.

'I'm home.'

**THE END**

**Thank you to everyone who supported me throughout this story. You're amazing. Reviews were greatly appreciated and inspired me to expand what was once a short 5 chapter story. And don't worry, this isn't the end. I have a few more story ideas in mind.**


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